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BA5 – Revision for integration of sources. Activity-Please write a paraphase of the few paragraphs below by David Goldman.
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Activity-Please write a paraphase of the few paragraphs below by David Goldman NEW YORK (CNNMoney) -- Apple's stock market value topped the $500 billion mark in early trading Wednesday, another record high for what was already the world's most valuable company. The half-trillion dollar valuation puts Apple in some extremely exclusive territory, making it one of the five most-valuable companies at any point in history. Only Microsoft, ExxonMobil, Cisco , General Electric and Intel have ever surpassed that mark. Exxon did it most recently in late 2007, when oil prices were soaring. Microsoft, Cisco and GE reached half a trillion dollars in market capitalization in 1999 during the height of the tech bubble. Microsoft was the only company ever to have a valuation of $600 billion. Its market cap now sits about $267 billion. Apple's valuation is now higher than the gross domestic product of Poland, Belgium, Sweden, Saudi Arabia, or Taiwan. (For more comparisons, check out this excellent blog: Things Apple is Worth More Than.)
Why integrate sources? • Properly adding context can help: • Define an idea • Introduce a source • Explain a relationship • Inform your readers • Highlight an idea
BA5 – what it’s all about • Select 3 paragraphs with at least five sentences in which you’ve integrated sources • Write a separate paragraph that evaluates how well you’ve integrated sources into your text: • Do they strengthen your synthesis? • Do they show a specific viewpoint? • Did you synthesize them with other sources/viewpoints? • What role do they play in moving from one idea to another? • Did you use too many sources? • Did you use too few sources excessively?
BA5 continued • Write a second paragraph that identifies how you could more effectively integrate sources for readability • How to better define an idea • Introduce a source • Explain a relationship • Inform your readers • Highlight an idea
BA5 continued • Put your BA5 in this order: • Original paragraph (clearly labeled as “original”) • Discussion paragraphs (clearly labeled as “discussion”) • Revised paragraph (clearly labeled as “revised”)
Some cool integration info • Do not use standalone quotes. • Ex: • According to Smith, The New Orleans Saints played exceptionally well and brought their blighted hometown a much-needed boost in morale. Player Marques Colston was philisophical. “We did this for the city of New Orleans” (Smith 3).
Punctuation when quoting • Mr. Smith states that “roses are better than tulips” (23). • Mr. Smith states that “roses are better than tulips,” even though he admits that “the Dutch are nicer than Germans” (33). • Mr. Smith lauds the superiority of tulips over roses: “roses are better than tulips” (23). • A popular idea is that “roses are better than tulips” (Smith 23).
Using ellipses • Indicate the omission of words/paragraphs by using ellipses: • McDaniel understands that “the New Orleans Saints were due for a win […] and they made their hometown proud” (4-5).
Changing words in a quote • indicate adding or changing the words in a quote (your own words) by using brackets [ ] • only change the text of a quote when it is necessary to match your meaning (grammar, punctuation, issues with clarity, completeness). DO NOT change the specific idea of the quote to match your needs. This is cheating. • EX: Smith argues that Eliot’s ideas are “ridiculous and that [he] is silly” (33).
Did you overuse a source? • Highlight each use of a source in your piece in a different color (on paper or through word) • Go back and see how often and for how long you've used each source. • Each source should be equally represented
A Sample Informative Paragraph What are NSAIDs? “There are two main kinds of anti-inflammatory medicines: non-steroidal and steroidal” (“Anti-inflammatory Medicines”). Non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drugs, commonly known as NSAIDs, are used on a regular basis “to treat mild to moderate discomfort such as muscle or joint pain”, which may be due to swelling caused by either infection, disease, or injury (Barrett et al. 150). NSAIDs are easy to obtain and available to almost everyone since many forms can be purchased over-the-counter. Since NSAIDs are so easily obtainable, it is then the responsibility of users to consult their healthcare providers in order to assure proper usage (Gorsline et al. 80).
Interplay between 2 Sources In Mike Adams article, “How Bad Is The Drought in Texas, Really?,” he tells how society has started to shoot the animals to put them out of their misery caused by the drought. Adams says that as much as people are suffering from droughts, “Even the wildlife are facing starvation and dying of thirst” (Adams). He also has begun to question whether or not he should kill some of the wild animals he’s seen in order to spare them from suffering. Adams thoughts about the suffering of animals is supported by Blair Fannin’s article, “Texas Drought Losses to Agriculture Approach $1.5 Billion.” Fannin tells how agriculture has suffered a major loss in livestock. Dr. David Anderson says that “the drought has been so severe that many stock tanks that provide water for livestock have become ‘dangerously low or dry’” (Fannin).
Highlight similar claims within a paragraph "The Effects Of Diagnostic Group And Gender On Challenging Behaviors In Infants And Toddlers with Cerebral Palsy, Down Syndrome Or Seizures" Ali Kozlowski discusses the comparison of different disabilities and CP in the behavior aspect. They define CP as the most common disability in child hood and DS as most common chromosomal disability (258). Behavior problems are more significant depending on how severe the form of CP is. Young children with DS and CP exhibit similar rates of challenging behaviors, and no gender differences exist at this age for these three populations in regard to challenging behaviors (263). In "Communication Deficits In Infants And Toddlers With Developmental Disabilities” Nicole Turygin discusses that motor problems are related to speech impairment delays toddlers with CP experience.
Explaining a Relationship/Consensus In fracturing, the greater concerns would be the potential for water blocking in the matrix feeding the fracture created and emulsion formation“(Kalfayan, 42). Both of these authors [instructor's note: Kalfayan and an author mentioned earlier in the paragraph] seem to agree in their books that hydraulic fracturing poses a possible threat to the surrounding environment around the drill sight. L. P. Dake also states that “fracking”, while still an efficient process of drilling, can cause some serious environmental issues. Dake states that production of natural gas using this method of drilling could cause damage due to chemical reactions and gas blockages around the gas well around a certain bubble point pressure (Dake, 153).
Group Work Please use the procedures we've outlined for BA 5 to edit and then discuss specifically the changes you've made to the specific paragraphs on the worksheet. Pretend like the paragraphs on the worksheet are your own, making suggestions and then following through to improve the individuals use of sources.
How to edit for sources Groups of 2. Choose one single sheet to edit. 1 person will make write down the edits on the sheet and then record revised sentences; the other group member will write down the rational behind making the changes. 1) Edit the piece for citation/grammar errors. 2) Underline key citation passages (probably 1 per paragraph) and rewrite this sentence or two to make a stronger synthesis. 3) Be prepared to share your revised source integrations and rationale with the class.