TEEN DATING VIOLENCE

1. TEEN DATING VIOLENCE Presented by:

2. Teenagers can choose better relationships when they learn to identify the early warning signs of an abusive relationship, understand that they have choices, and believe they are valuable people who deserve to be treated with respect.

3. FACTS

4. Dating Violence Facts • 72% of 8th and 9th graders reportedly “date” • 10% of students nationwide report being physically hurt by a boyfriend or girlfriend in the past 12 months • 1 in 3 teenage females are victims of physical, verbal, emotional or sexual abuse • Teen dating violence most often takes place in the home of one of the partners. CDC (2009) and Love is Not Abuse

5. Dating Violence Facts • 18-24 year-olds comprised only 11.7% of the population in 1998 and 2002, but were the majority of victims of violence committed by a boyfriend or girlfriend (42%) • One study reported that 38% of date rapes victims were young women between the ages of 14 to 17 years old. • 68% of rape victims knew their attacker as either a boyfriend, friend or casual acquaintance. Study by the American Bar Association

6. Dating Violence Facts • In a study of eighth and ninth graders, 25 percent indicated that they had been victims of dating violence, including 8% who disclosed being sexually abused • In a survey of 232 high school girls, 17.8% of the participants indicated that they had been forced to engage in sexual activity against their will by a dating partner • Among female students between the ages of 15-20 who reported at least one violent act during a dating relationship, 24% reported experiencing extremely violent incidents such as rape or the use of weapons against them • In a study of 724 adolescent mothers between the ages of 12-18, 1 of every 8 pregnant adolescents reported having been physically assaulted by the father of her baby during the preceding 12 months Study by the American Bar Association

7. Teen Cycle of Violence Who were you out with so late? Let me see your phone. You shouldn’t have done that Pushing I’m sorry! I’ll change. You never do anything right! Let me make it up to you! Hitting

8. Power and Control Wheel Courtesy of Alabama Coalition Against Domestic Violence

9. HEALTH REASONS

10. HEALTH • Estimated medical costs of Domestic Violence are anywhere from $4-7 billion a year • Victims of domestic violence have health care costs TWICE that of those who have never been abused  • Victims of violence are more likely to suffer from anxiety, depression, sexually transmitted diseases, alcoholism, and drug abuse Study by the Family Violence Prevention Fund and CDC, 2009

11. HEALTH • Emotionally and verbally abused women who have NEVER been PHYSICALLY abused have health care costs 33% more than women not suffering from abuse • Children born to women who have been abused have twice the number of EMERGENCY ROOM follow up visits 18 months after birth • Children of women who have been abused are 3 times more likely to seek mental health services

12. HEALTH • Girls who reported that they had been sexually or physically abused were more than twice as likely as non abused girls to report smoking (26% versus 10%), drinking (22% versus 12%), and using illegal drugs (30% versus 13%) • 32 percent of girls who had been abused reported bingeing and purging, compared to 12 percent of girls who had not been abused Study by the American Bar Association

13. Emotional Development • Victims carry the patterns of violence into future relationships • Physically abused teens are three times more likely than their non-abused peers to experience violence during college CDC, 2009

14. What’s technology got to do with it?

15. What’s technology got to do with it? • A recent survey by the Associated Press and MTV shows that nearly 25% of respondents ages 14 to 24 reported that partners check in multiple times a day to see where they are or who they are with and more than 10% said partners demanded passwords • 1 in 4 teens has been harassed, put down, or called names via cell or text • 1 in 5 teen have been harassed via social networking site • 17% of teens in a recent survey report that a boyfriend or girlfriend has made them afraid to not respond to a cell phone call, email, IM, or text message because of what he or she might do

16. Technology • 1 in 3 teens say they are text messaged up to thirty times an hour by a partner or ex-partner inquiring where they are, what they are doing, or who they are with • 1 in 4 teens in a relationship communicated with their partner by cell phone or text messaging hourly between midnight and 5:00 a.m • 50% of teens believe that computers and cell phones make abuse more likely to occur in a teen dating relationship and make it easier to conceal abuse from parents • 67% of parents were unaware that their teens’ dating partners check up on them 30+ times a day on their cell phones and 82% of parents did not know that their teens were emailed or texted 30 times per HOUR Courtesy of Break the Cycle

17. SUPPORT SYSTEM

18. SUPPORT SYSTEM • 50-80% of teens report knowing someone involved in a violent relationship • Teens are unlikely to report any abuse, including high-tech abuse, to parents or other adults • Peer Acceptance

19. Yeardley Love:The trial began last week http://www.wjla.com/articles/2012/02/yeardley-love-murder-case-jury-selection-begins-monday-72259.html

20. Yeardley Love Friends knew about: • a violent encounter between the couple that was broken up by several visiting lacrosse players • an incident in which Huguely attacked Love while drunk but did not recall having hit her • threatening e-mail and text messages that Huguely sent to Love post-breakup • Yeardly could NOT have gotten a TPO

21. Access To Protective Orders • In Georgia, minors can obtain Protective Orders (POs), but the law does not specify whether POs can be granted against minor abusers. Georgia’s law excludes people in dating relationships from accessing POs. This results in an automatic failing grade for Georgia. • State law does not allow minors to petition for a PO on their own behalf. A person who is not a minor must petition for the order on the minor’s behalf. Georgia law does not specify whether the parent or guardian of the minor will be notified about the PO. • A judge may issue a PO if the respondent has physically abused, sexually abused, or stalked the petitioner; or damaged the petitioner's property. The statute fails to explicitly recognize harassment and threats of physical abuse as qualifications for relief. The statute may recognize other forms of abuse not specifically listed here.

22. Where can I go for help? • Teens can go to parents or other trusted adult. • Anyone can call National Teen Dating Abuse Hotline at 1-866-331-9474. This hotline is staffed by teens and adults. The also have a live, interactive website loveisrespect.org. • Cherokee Family Violence Center’s hotline at 770-479-1703. • YWCA of NW GA Hotline 770-427-3390.

23. Answers to the Pretest Questions • Which of the following could be considered a sign of relationship abuse? • My boyfriend didn't call me last night. • My boyfriend called me a slut in front of his friends because I was wearing makeup. • My boyfriend forgot our anniversary. • My boyfriend doesn’t know my favorite color. • Which of the following is considered a crime? • Robbery • Rape • Relationship violence • All of the above

24. 3. What kind of behavior could be considered relationship abuse? • Keeping someone away from their friends or family • Calling someone names • Controlling what someone wears • All of the above 4. What percentage of teenage girls age 14 to 17 report knowing someone their own age who has been hit or beaten by a boyfriend? • 10% • 25% • 40% • 55%

25. I think a friend of mine might be in a violent relationship. What • should I do? • Take her shopping • Talk to her, ask if everything's okay, in a calm non-judgmental way • Have your boyfriend beat up her boyfriend • Mind my own business • I think a friend of mine is hitting his girlfriend. What is the first thing I • I should do? • Sit down with him one-on-one, in a quiet place, and start talking to him about it. • Go immediately to a school counselor • Don't say anything • Go beat him up

26. 7. If everyone said you and your boyfriend were a cute couple but he was starting to get violent, what could you do? • Talk to a friend • Talk to a parent • Talk to a teacher, counselor or another trusted adult • All of the above 8. What can you do if you end a violent relationship, but your ex-boyfriend keeps trying to see you? • Explain your situation to an adult you can trust • Avoid situations where you might see your ex • Call the police if you are threatened or if you feel afraid • All of the above

27. Myth or Fact?? • “Teen dating violence only happens to kids from bad homes.” MYTH • Jealousy and possessiveness are a sign that the persons sees you as a possession. It is one of the most common early warning sign of abuse. FACT • Boys, as well as girls, can be victims of teen dating violence and it can occur in any type of relationship—gay or straight. FACT • My partner checks up on me because he/she is worried about me. MYTH

28. Dating Bill of Rights • To always be treated with respect. • In a respectful relationship, you should be treated as an equal. • To be in a healthy relationship. • A healthy relationship is not controlling, manipulative, or jealous. • A healthy relationship involves honesty, trust, and communication. • To not be hurt physically or emotionally. • You should feel safe in your relationship at all times. Abuse is never deserved and is never your fault.Conflicts should be resolved in a peaceful and rational way. • To refuse sex or affection at anytime.

29. Dating Bill of Rights (cont) • A healthy relationship involves making consensual sexual decisions. You have the right to not have sex.Even if you have had sex before, you have the right to refuse sex for any reason. • To have friends and activities apart from my boyfriend or girlfriend. • Spending time by yourself, with male or female friends, or with family is normal and healthy. • To end a relationship. • You should not be harassed, threatened, or made to feel guilty for ending an unhealthy or healthyrelationship. You have the right to end a relationship for any reason you choose.