Healthy Relationships and Sexuality

1. Healthy Relationships and Sexuality

2. Characterizing and Forming Intimate Relationships • Intimate Relationships characteristics • Behavioral interdependence • Need fulfillment • Emotional attachment • Emotional availability • Need Fulfillment • Intimacy • Social integration • Nurturance • Assistance • Affirmation

3. How Intimate Is a Relationship?

4. Characterizing and Forming Intimate Relationships • Being Self-Nurturant • Accountability • Both partners see themselves as responsible for their own decisions, choices, and actions. • Self-nurturance • Developing individual potential through a balanced and realistic appreciation of self-worth and ability • Families: The Ties That Bind • Family of origin • The people present in our household our first years of life—usually parents and siblings

5. Today’s Changing Families

6. Characterizing and Forming Intimate Relationships • Establishing Friendships • Relationships are between two or more people that involve mutual respect, trust, support and intimacy that may or may not include sexual intimacy. • Significant Others, Partners, and Couples • Fascination • Exclusiveness • Sexual desire • Giving the utmost • Being an advocate or champion

7. This Thing Called Love • Theories of Love • Intimacy—closeness, sharing, and mutual support • Passion—lust, attraction, and sexual arousal • Compassion—decision to be open to love in the short term and the commitment to the relationship in the long term • There are many different definitions of love. How would you define it?

8. Sternberg’s Triangular Theory of Love

9. This Thing Called Love • Anthropologist H. Fisher and others theorize love and attraction based on brain circuitry and chemistry • Imprinting - gen. predisp. + past exp. • Attraction – neurochemicals = euphoria • Attachment – endorphins = secure, calm, peaceful • Production of a “cuddle chemical” called oxycontin = satisfaction, attachment

10. This Thing Called Love • Picking Partners • Proximity—being in the same place at the same time • Similarities—“opposites attract” usually isn’t true • Reciprocity—react with mutual regard • Physical attraction • Men tend to be attracted primarily to youth and beauty. • Women tend to be attracted to older mates who are financially stable.

11. Communicating: A Key to Good Relationships • Self-Esteem and Self-Acceptance • Self-concept is the way you define yourself. • Self-esteem is the way you evaluate yourself. • Learning Appropriate Self-Disclosure • Get to know yourself. • Become more accepting of yourself. • Be willing to discuss your sexual history. • Choose a safe context for self disclosure.

12. Gender and Health

13. Communicating: A Key to Good Relationships • Becoming a Better Listener • We listen best when • we believe that the message is somehow important and relevant to us • the speaker holds our attention through humor, dramatic effect, use of media, or other techniques • we are in the mood to listen (free of distractions and worries)

14. Communicating: A Key to Good Relationships • Using Nonverbal Communication • Touch • Gestures • Interpersonal space • Facial expression • Body language • Tone of voice

15. Committed Relationships • Marriage • Monogamy—exclusive sexual involvement with one partner • Serial monogamy—a monogamous sexual relationship with one partner before moving on to the next monogamous relationship • Open relationships—partners agree that there may be sexual involvement for each person outside of the marriage • Cohabitation • A relationship in which two unmarried people live with an intimate connection together in the same household. • Common-law marriage

16. Marital Status of the U.S. Population by Sex

17. Committed Relationships • Gay and Lesbian Partnerships • Significant increase in such partnerships in 2000 census— three times the reported number than in the 1990 census • Obtaining the same level of marriage benefits continues to be a challenge, though some U.S. states now recognize same-sex marriage along with several countries. • Staying Single • 76.4 percent of women aged 20 to 24 have never been married according to data from 2007. • 86.9 percent of men aged 20 to 24 remain unmarried according to data from 2007.

18. Confronting Couples Issues • Jealousy in Relationships • Overdependence on the relationship • Severity of the threat of jealousy • High value on sexual exclusivity • Low self-esteem • Fear of losing control • Changing Gender Roles • Our modern society has very few gender-specific roles. • Over time, if couples are unable to communicate how they feel about gender roles, the relationship may suffer.

19. Confronting Couples Issues • Sharing Power • Power dynamics between women and men have shifted. • Successful couples have power relationships that reflect their unique needs rather than popular stereotypes. • Unmet Expectations • An extension of our values, beliefs, hopes, and dreams for the future • Partners in healthy relationships can communicate wants and needs.

20. Having Children… Or Not? • Factors to Consider • Relationships change when a couple decides to have children. • Resources and attention are split. • Existing stressors in a relationship are further accentuated when parenting is added to existing responsibilities. • Having a child is not a cure for a bad relationship, and may actually increase stressors on the relationship. • Blended Families • Nearly half a million children each year become part of a blended family.

21. Having Children… Or Not? • Common Parenting Styles • Authoritarian—“giving orders” • Permissive—“giving in” • Assertive–Democratic—“giving choices”

22. Healthy versus Unhealthy Relationships

23. When Relationships Falter • When and Why Relationships End • Illness • Financial concerns • Career problems • Unmet expectations • Communication breakdown • The highest the divorce rate in the United States has been 41 percent • See p. 141

24. When Relationships Falter • Coping with Failed Relationships • Recognize and acknowledge your feelings. • Find healthful ways to express your emotions. • Spend time with friends, both old and new. • Don’t rush into a “rebound” relationship.

25. Your Sexual Identity: More Than Biology • All eggs carry an X chromosome. • Sperm carry an X or a Y chromosome. • Sex hormones play a major role in puberty: • Male hormone—testosterone • Female hormone—estrogen, progesterone • Pituitary gland—gonadotropins • Secondary sex characteristics are developed

26. Your Sexual Identity: More Than Biology • Sexual Identity • Recognition of oneself as a sexual being; a composite of biological sex characteristics, gender identity, gender roles and sexual orientation. • Intersexuality—not exhibiting exclusively male or female primary and secondary sex characteristics • Gender Identity • The psychological condition of being feminine or masculine as defined by the society in which one lives • Gender roles • Gender identity • Transgendered • Transsexual

27. Your Sexual Identity: More Than Biology • Sexual Orientation • A person’s enduring emotional, romantic, sexual or affectionate attraction to other persons • Heterosexual • Homosexual • Bisexual • Sexual Prejudice • Sexual minorities are often targets of hate crimes, discrimination, and hostility

28. Sexual Anatomy and Physiology • Female Sexuality Anatomy and Physiology • External Female Organs • Mons pubis—pad of fatty tissue covering the pubic bone • Labia majora—folds of skin and erectile tissue that enclose openings • Labia minora—folds of mucous membrane • Clitoris—female sexual organ, only known function is pleasure • Urethral opening—urine leaves the body • Hymen—a thin membrane that may cover the vagina in some women • Perineum—the area between the vulva and anus • Vaginal opening—opening to the vagina

29. Sexual Anatomy and Physiology • Female Sexuality Anatomy and Physiology • Internal Female Organs • Vagina—a tubular organ that serves as a passageway from the uterus to the outside of the female body • Uterus (womb)—hollow, muscular, and pear-shaped • The endometrium—inner lining of the uterus, either prepares the uterus for implantation or menstrual flow • Fallopian tubes—two thin tubes where sperm and egg meet extending from the uterus • Ovaries—almond-sized structures suspended on either side of the uterus that produce the female hormones

30. Female Reproductive System

31. Sexual Anatomy and Physiology • The Onset of Puberty and the Menstrual Cycle • Hypothalamus signals to ovaries to produce estrogens and progesterone.

32. Sexual Anatomy and Physiology • Menarche • First menstrual period • Generally starts between ages 9 and 17 • Body fat influences onset of puberty. • Menstrual Cycle • Usually 28 days long • Proliferative, secretory, and menstrual phase • Menstrual Problems • Premenstrual syndrome (PMS): food cravings, fatigue, irritability, depression, tender breasts • Premenstrual dysphoric disorder (PMDD): severe PMS • Dysmenorrhea = menstrual cramps • Toxic shock syndrome (TSS): bacterial infection facilitated by tampon or diaphragm

33. Hormonal Control and Phases of the Menstrual Cycle

34. Sexual Anatomy and Physiology • Menopause • Permanent cessation of menstruation • Generally occurs between ages 40 and 60 • Often accompanied by decreased vaginal lubrication, hot flashes, headaches, dizziness, and joint pain. • Onset symptoms can be ameliorated by hormone replacement therapy (HRT) • Results from the Women’s Health Initiative (WHI) suggest that hormone therapy may actually do more harm than good. • It is important to find a doctor who specializes in women’s health.

35. Sexual Anatomy and Physiology • Male Sexual Anatomy and Physiology • External Genitals • Scrotum—protects the testes • Penis—deposits semen • Internal Genitals • Testes—manufacture testosterone • Epididymis—sperm ripen here • Vas deferens—stores and transfers sperm • Ejaculatory ducts—through which semen is ejaculated • Urethra—passes sperm and urine

36. Male Reproductive System Figure 5.8

37. Sexual Anatomy and Physiology • Accessory Glands • Seminal vesicles—provide nutrients and fluids to semen • Prostate gland—provide fluids to semen • Cowper’s glands—secrete fluid that lubricates the urethra • Circumcision • Surgical removal of a fold of skin covering the end of the penis known as the foreskin • Decreased risk of urinary tract infections in the first year, and HIV

38. Sexual Anatomy and Physiology • Human Sexual Response • Excitement/arousal—vasocongestion • Plateau phase—nipples and penis erect, preejaculatory fluid+sperm! • Orgasmic phase—muscles contract • Resolution phase—profound relaxation • Refractory period— “time out” for men

39. Expressing Your Sexuality • Sexual Behavior: What Is “Normal”? • Coital standard • Orgasmic standard • Two-person standard • Romantic standard • Safer sex standard

40. Expressing Your Sexuality • Options for Sexual Expression • Celibacy—avoidance or abstention from sex • Autoerotic behaviors—sexual fantasy and masturbation • Kissing and erotic touching—erogenous zones • Manual stimulation—use of sex toys, touching by partner • Oral-genital stimulation • Cunnilingus—oral stimulation of the female’s genitals • Fellatio—oral stimulation of the male’s genitals • Vaginal intercourse—insertion of the penis into the vagina • Anal intercourse—insertion of the penis into the anus

41. Expressing Your Sexuality • Variant Sexual Expression • Group sex • Transvestism • Fetishism • Exhibitionism • Voyeurism • Sadomasochism • Pedophilia • Autoerotic asphyxiation

42. Types of Sexual Dysfunction

43. Responsible and Satisfying Sexual Behavior • Good communication as the foundation • Acknowledging that you are a sexual person • Understanding sexual structures and their functions • Accepting and embracing your gender identity and your sexual orientation

44. Drugs and Sex

45. Drugs and Sex • Alcohol can inhibit sexual response • Increasing number of young men experimenting with the recreational use of drugs to treat erectile dysfunction • Viagra • Cialis • Levitra • “Date Rape” Drugs • Rohypnol (“roofies”) • Gamma-hydroxybutyrate (GHB) • Ketamine