Cyber Safety and Bullying

1. Cyber Safetyand Bullying Officer Sean Riley Housing Liaison Officer Framingham Police Department Nationally Certified Crime Prevention Specialist

2. A big thank you to the Framingham Police Association for sponsoring tonight’s presentation and providing pizza and drinks.

3. How am I going to live today in order to create the tomorrow I’m committed to? - Tony Robbins

4. Cyber Safety • Internet Predators • Cyber Bullying and Bullying • Responsible sharing of pictures and videos

5. Internet Predators http://www.soc.ucsb.edu/sexinfo/article/sexual-predators-cyber-space

6. What is an Internet Predator? • Uses the internet (e-mail, IM, social networks, online gaming) to search for vulnerable children • Is usually an adult • May pretend to be a child or teenager • May pretend to be a responsible adult • Tells lies to gain the trust of the child • Intends to cause some type of harm to the child, usually sex crimes or kidnapping

7. Social Networks • Facebook • Twitter • Instagram • Snapchat • Can have photo, video or text delete within 1 to 10 seconds. • You can capture the screen if fast enough. • The Vine • Create and Share video • Online gaming • Others? • *PC and Mobile Device Apps provide access

9. What should you look out for? • They look for children who spend a lot of time online, and usually at the same time of day • They look for children who are willing to “chat” online with someone they do not know • They prefer to use Instant Messenger to communicate • They seek out children who talk about being lonely or sad

10. What should you look out for? • They usually seek a child from a one-parent home • They search out children who post personal profiles on the internet, especially those that provide name, age, gender, photos, etc. • They favor children who own webcams or digital cameras • They will sometimes send a camera to the child they are targeting

11. What should you look out for? • They will usually try to convince children to use the webcam or digital camera to send pictures of themselves • They will most likely eventually start to talk about “sex” or sexual things

13. How do you prevent yourself from becoming a target? • Do not post personal information (pictures, school, address, phone number, etc..) • Create privacy settings so YOU control who can see your information (ask a parent or teacher if you don’t know how to do this) • Limit the amount of time you spend online, and change up the time of day

14. How do you prevent yourself from becoming a target? • Do not talk about private family matters online • Do not respond to instant messages from someone that you don’t know • NEVER AGREE TO MEET WITH PEOPLE YOU DON’T KNOW!!!Predators will spend days, weeks, months, even years building your trust and pretending to be your friend.

15. What should you do if you think you may be talking to an Internet Predator? • STOP! • Walk away but do not erase the messages • Immediately tell someone you trust! • Parent • Teacher • Police Officer

16. Internet Safety When surfing online, always remember WWW. • Who is going to see it? • What am I sharing? • Why do they need it?

17. Internet Safety Posting Pictures Online • Anyone can see your pictures, so choose wisely. • Would you show the picture to your parents? • Pictures showing you consuming drugs or alcohol could get you in trouble. • Once something is shared or published on the Internet, it never truly goes away. • Future employees may check websites or pictures before deciding to hire you.

18. Cyber Bullying

19. I’m not concerned with your liking or disliking me… All I ask is that you respect me as a human being. - Jackie Robinson

20. What is Cyber Bullying? • What is Bullying? • Bullying is unwanted, aggressive behavior • The bully tries to show power over the person that is being bullied • There are three types of bullying: • Verbal Bullying (teasing, name calling, inappropriate comments, threatening) • Social Bullying (embarrassing someone in public, leaving someone out, spreading rumors) • Physical Bullying (hitting, kicking tripping, pushing, spitting)

21. What is Cyber Bullying? • Cyber Bullying is bullying that happens using the internet (social networks, e-mail, texts, chats, etc.) • Mean text messages or e-mails • Rumors posted on social networking sites • Posting or sharing embarrassing pictures of someone else

22. What makes Cyber Bullying different from other types of bullying? • Cyber Bullying is harder to get away from • It can happen 24 hours a day, seven days a week • Messages and pictures can be posted anonymously and can reach a lot of people very quickly • It is very hard to delete inappropriate or harassing messages or pictures once they have been posted

24. What problems can Cyber Bullying cause to the victim? • Kids who are Cyber Bullied are more likely to: • Skip school • Receive poor grades • Have lower self esteem • Have more health problems • Abuse drugs and alcohol

25. Bullying 74% of 8 to 11 year olds say teasing and bullying happen at their school. Every day, nearly 160,000 children miss school because they are scared of bullying. National Education Association.

26. Bullying Bullying is: • Fighting, threatening, name-calling, teasing, or excluding someone repeatedly and over time. • An imbalance of power, such as size or popularity. • Physical, social, and emotional harm. • Hurting another person to get something.

27. Bullying • 85% of the time kids are around to see bullying. • Most of the time kids witness bullying, they stand by passively. This causes bullying to last longer because it reinforces the bullies power and status. • Most kids don’t want to get involved because they don’t want to be the next “victim”.

28. Bullying • 2 out of 3 kids want to help when they see bullying, and helping out is one of the most effective ways to stop bullying and prevent it from happening again. • When friends help out, 57% of the time bullying stops in 10 seconds (Hawkins, Pepler, and Craig, Social Development, 2001)

29. Bullying There are effective and safe ways for kids to step in and help others being bullied. Remember, only step in when you feel safe to do so. • Walk Away • Speak Up • Be a Friend • Ask others to help • Get an adult

30. You just can’t beat the person who never gives up. - Babe Ruth

31. What problems can Cyber Bullying cause to the bully? • Massachusetts has a law, C.71 S.370 addressing bullying that your school has to respond to bullying happening online. What does that mean? You could be disciplined at school for something that you did at home. • Being a bully can get you suspended or expelled from school • Being a bully can get you kicked off a sports team or banned from other fun activities

32. What problems can Cyber Bullying cause to the bully? • If you get expelled for being a bully, it can be hard to get into a new school • If you have bullying on your school record, it will be harder to get into college and to get a good job • IF BULLYING GOES TOO FAR, YOU CAN GET ARRESTED!!!

33. What can you do if you or someone else is being Cyber Bullied? • SPEAK UP! • Immediately tell an adult that you trust • Do not allow yourself to get “sucked into the drama” because you might end up posting something back that could get you into trouble too • Reporting bullying does not make you weak or a “rat.” Bullying is extremely harmful, and reporting it may save someone’s life!

34. How can you make sure that you are not being a Cyber Bully? • DO NOT USE THE INTERNET, iPHONE, OR iPOD (and other mobile devices)TO : • Spread rumors • Post embarrassing pictures or videos • Post hurtful or inappropriate messages • Post threatening messages • Purposely exclude others from the group • Turn some friends against others

35. What can parents do? • Teach kids to solve problems without using violence and praise them when they do. • Give children positive feedback when they behave well to help build self-esteem. • Give them the self-confidence to stand up for themselves and what they believe in. • Talk to your children about their day and listen to what they say about school, classmates, and any problems they have. • Take bullying seriously. Many kids are embarrassed to say they have been bullied. • If you see any bullying, stop it right away, even if your child is the one doing the bullying. • Encourage your child to help others who need it. • Don’t bully your children or bully others in front of them. Many times kids who are bullied at home react by bullying other kids. Your children will repeat what they see and hear at home.

36. Parents: Warning signs • Withdrawal • A loss of friends • A drop in grades • A loss of interest in activities he or she previously enjoyed • Torn clothing • Bruises • A need for extra money or supplies

37. Parents: How you can help • Talk to your child’s teacher instead of confronting the bully’s parents. If teacher doesn’t act, go to principal. • Teach your child nonviolent ways to deal with bullies, like walking away, playing with friends, or talking it out. • Help your child act with self-confidence. With him or her, practice walking upright, looking people in the eye, and speaking clearly. • Don’t encourage your child to fight. This could lead to him or her getting hurt, getting in trouble, and beginning more serious problems with the bully. Your child does have the right to defend themselves though. • Involve your child in activities outside of school. This way he or she can make friends in different social circles.

38. I firmly believe that respect is a lot more important, and a lot greater, than popularity. - Julius Erving

39. When Your Child Is a Bully It is hard for any parent to believe their child is a bully, but sometimes it happens. Your child may bully if, he or she: • Lacks empathy and doesn’t sympathize with others • Values aggression • Likes to be in charge • Is an arrogant winner and sore loser • Often fights with brothers and sisters • Is impulsive

40. When Your Child Is a Bully What you can do to stop your child from bullying • Take it seriously. Don’t treat bullying as a passing phase. Even if you’re not worried about long-lasting effects on your child, another child is being hurt. • Talk to your child and find out why he or she is bullying. Often, children bully when they feel sad, angry, lonely, or insecure and many times major changes at home or school may bring on these feelings. • Help build empathy for others and talk to your child about how it feels to be bullied. • Talk with the school, perhaps there is something going on you have not been made aware of. • Ask yourself if someone at home is bullying your child.

41. Video chatting and sharing pictures and videos http://portables.about.com/od/otherdevices/ig/iPad-gallery/iPad-2-FaceTime-Video-Chat.htm

42. Video chatting and sharing pictures and videos • Webcams • Skype • Face Time • iPhone and iPod pix messages • iPhone and iPod video messages

43. Consequences of inappropriate use of video chat and picture/video sharing • Sexting is sending a message with pictures of children or teens that are inappropriate, naked or engaged in sex acts • Sexting is against the law, and often the sender of the message as well as everyone who receives it are at risk of getting arrested

44. Consequences of inappropriate use of video chat and picture/video sharing • Posting nude or suggestive photos is EXTREMELY DANGEROUS and could be considered child pornography. What does that mean? If you are caught, you could be arrested • Tens of thousands of predators are using social media under false names even though there are new security and privacy settings. What does that mean? You never know who you are REALLY talking to online

45. Video chatting and sharing pictures and videos • Always be responsible when video chatting, posting pictures and videos on social networks, and sending pictures and videos to friends • THINK BEFORE YOU POST! The information you post can NEVER be completely removed or deleted. • Don’t post anything you wouldn’t want your parents/teachers/employers/college reps to see NOW or in the FUTURE (pictures and messages).

46. Criminal Offenses • Stalking • Annoying telephone calls/Electronic Communications • Criminal Harassment • Enticement of a child under 18 by electronic communication • Pornography Offenses

47. Internet Safety Tools and Resources • “Google Alerts” (google.com/alerts) • “Safe Eyes” software (internetsafety.com) • fbi.gov • kidshealth.org • netsmartz.org • *There are numerous on-line resources and safety tips available to parents and children!

48. Test your knowledge http://www.safekids.com/quiz/

49. Commit to Safe Internet Use • Kids’ Contract http://www.safekids.com/safekidscontract.pdf • Teen Pledge http://safekids.com/pdfs/teen_pledge.pdf

50. SMART 911 • The Framingham Police Department is encouraging everyone to sign-up for SMART911. (this is a free service) • Sign up at www.smart911.com • If you call 911 we will be able to now see any information you want to provide, for example medical history, medications, emergency contacts and more • ALL INFORMATION IS CONFIDENTIAL