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This presentation by Dr. Julie Bazemore from the Georgia Center for Assessment focuses on scoring argumentative essays using the EOC rubric. The topic of the essay is whether online social networking activities have improved teenagers' lives. The presentation includes review of models and scoring practice papers.
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Scoring Argumentative Items Paulding County Schools Grade 9 Presentedby Dr. Julie Bazemore The Georgia Center for Assessment
OBJECTIVES • Increase knowledge of how text-dependent arguments are scored using the EOC rubric
Agenda • Introductions • Review models • Score practice papers
Grade 9 Extended Response • Has online social networking activities improved teenagers’ lives? Write an argumentative essay that addresses this question. In your essay, be sure to: • Give at least three reasons to support your argument. • Develop these reasons with appropriate evidence from the passages. • Identify and address at least one counter claim.
Score Point 4 The student’s response is a well-developed argument that develops and supports claims with clear reasons and relevant evidence based on text as a stimulus. • Effectively introduces claim(s), acknowledges and counters opposing claim(s), and engages the audience • Uses an organizational strategy to establish clear relationships among claim(s), counterclaim(s), reasons, and relevant evidence • Uses specific and well-chosen facts, details, definitions, examples, and/or other information from sources to develop claim(s) and counterclaim(s) fully and fairly and to point out strengths and limitations of both while anticipating the audience’s knowledge and concerns • Uses words, phrases, and clauses that effectively connect the major sections of the text and clarify relationships between claim(s) and reasons, between reasons and evidence, and between claim(s) and counterclaim(s) • Uses and maintains a formal style and objective tone that is appropriate for task, purpose, and audience • Provides a strong concluding statement or section that follows from and supports the argument presented
Student Response The current generation of children are no strangers of the ever growing social media sites. For many, it consumes a lot of their time per day. They can talk to people through social media that they could have never been able to in the past. They can stay more connected to their friends by chatting with them outside of face-to-face meetups. However, many people say that social media is destroying the younger generation. This is completely false. Firstly, social media is keeping kids connected all around the world. If they were to go to a special event and meet someone who they like and want to stay in touch with, social media is the perfect tool to use. According to 2014's Forrester's North American Consumer Youth Survey, 57% of teens get to know a friend better by following their social media and 46% agree that social media sites encourage social awareness and community involvement. These are both very positive social behaviors that social media has caused.
Student Response Continued… • Another reason why social media is a positive thing is that it can lead to more information being passed on, leading to higher intelligence. Before the internet or social media, there weren't many ways to receive a lot of knowledge outside of books. Now information can be passed on instantly between people. This can lead to people learning facts that they had never heard before or finding an opinion that they had never thought of. It can also lead to topics that leave everyone more knowledgeable about a subject. According to the same survey mentioned previously, 59% of teens that use social media note that academic performance has increased. This is due to the unlimited supply of information on social media that kids are exposed to every day.
Student Response Continued… • While some may say that social media is not good because it can lead to things such as identity theft or private information being made public, this is simply false. According to Identity Theft and Social Media, there are only a few easy steps that must be followed in order to prevent identity theft. Following these simple steps will make it a lot harder for people to steal your identity. As for people making private information public, that is simply not the social media site's fault. Social media sites have an option to make your account private so that only people you approve can see what you post. This can eliminate a lot of the worries about unknown people seeing your posts. Also, people themselves should not be posting private information onto social media. Everyone has been taught since they were young children that they shouldn't talk to strangers, so the same should apply online. Both of these problems on social media can be completely eliminated by following only a few easy steps.
Student Response Continued… • All in all, social media is a positive on the youth of today. It can connect them to many people across the world, it can lead them to finding new facts or opinions that they never knew or thought of before, and as long as they are safe and think before they post something for the world to see, they will stay safe. • Score = 4 (The student did an excellent job including relevant details from the passages AND developing his/her argument about whether social networking has improved teenagers’ lives. The essay was also well organized.)
Student Response Social networking has helped teenagers' lives immensely. Now, teens can look at their phones (or other electronic devices) and be more connected with their friends and family. Social networking can also improve the grades of teens. Finally, they can be informed about big news faster. Buzz Buzz! You're getting a notification that it's your best friends birthday. Today, social networking has helped teens stay informed about everything that's going on today, including birthdays, holidays, and special events happening at school. In the 2nd paragraph of Passage A, it says "Teens around the world insist that these online communities promote interactions among family and friends...". Teens can stay involved with society with social networking. Social networking can also improve the grades of teens. Left your book bag at school? Well I bet you still have your phone with you! Even if you leave any of your school papers that you needed to study somewhere, you can just pull out your phone and look it up. Simple as that. According to Passage A, Forrester's North America Consumer Youth Survey, it states, "59% note an increase in academic performance.". Social networking can answer a lot of questions for your test you have tomorrow.
Student Response Continued… Lastly, teens tend to stay more involved with the news (such as weather) than others. People on social media sites often give out information to others, letting them know if anything is happening. In Passage A, it states "Because of their access to instant information... today's teens may appear more informed than previous generations.". With social networking, teens just have a faster, better way of getting informed with news. Many believe that people can just get our information like how people 10-20 years ago did it, by letters and things like that. This method would get to you way later than it should, and not only that, it could get lost somewhere. So, let's just stick to today's way of doing it, social networking. Social networking has really improved teens' lives. They can stay updated and not get left behind. Also, teens can do better in school if they had social networking. Score = 3 (The student’s essay would be improved if he/she more fully addressed the counterargument.)
Student Response The negative effect on teenagers" lives from social networking activities is tremendous. Statistics show that 20% of teens report that social networking activities have led to a negative affect on their grades, 49% report they've learned false information online, and 49% also report being a victim of cyberbullying. Identity theft is another major problem that can cause trouble in the online teen community. A whopping 68% of teens remain vulnerable to hacking, viruses, and other malware. This means that a hacker could easily hack into a teenagers social networking account and learn valuable information about that person. Before a teenager knows it, a hacker has already found their social security number and sold it to a person, such as an illegal immigrant, who can then use this to buy things, get jobs, loans, and access to loads of other stuff!
Student Response So if you're still convinced that social networking is positively affecting teenagers lives, you may already be a victim to identity theft, cyberbullying, or having your grades affected in negative ways. Score = 2 (The student included relevant details in his/her essay, but he/she needs to elaborate more on these details to support his/her argument. The essay would be improved if he/she addressed a counterargument.)
Student Response Honestly social media is a bad thing. A person puts to much personal information out into the world. Like passage A said "virtual spaces where teens meet, chat, view or post photos, exchange personal stories, ect." Them things can get out there and stuff like identity theft can happen. as in passage B, these thefts can take everything of yours, including your credit card that has all your money. Score = 1 (The student’s response contained little original writing.)
Score Point 0 • Blank • Copied • Too Limited to Score/Illegible/Incomprehensible • Non-English/Foreign Language • Off Topic/Off Task/Offensive
Student Response Social networking has helped teenagers' lives immensely. Now, teens can look at their phones (or other electronic devices) and be more connected with their friends and family. Social networking can also improve the grades of teens. Finally, they can be informed about big news faster. Buzz Buzz! You're getting a notification that it's your best friends birthday. Today, social networking has helped teens stay informed about everything that's going on today, including birthdays, holidays, and special events happening at school. In the 2nd paragraph of Passage A, it says "Teens around the world insist that these online communities promote interactions among family and friends...". Teens can stay involved with society with social networking. Social networking can also improve the grades of teens. Left your book bag at school? Well I bet you still have your phone with you! Even if you leave any of your school papers that you needed to study somewhere, you can just pull out your phone and look it up. Simple as that. According to Passage A, Forrester's North America Consumer Youth Survey, it states, "59% note an increase in academic performance.". Social networking can answer a lot of questions for your test you have tomorrow.
Student Response Continued… Lastly, teens tend to stay more involved with the news (such as weather) than others. People on social media sites often give out information to others, letting them know if anything is happening. In Passage A, it states "Because of their access to instant information... today's teens may appear more informed than previous generations.". With social networking, teens just have a faster, better way of getting informed with news. Many believe that people can just get our information like how people 10-20 years ago did it, by letters and things like that. This method would get to you way later than it should, and not only that, it could get lost somewhere. So, let's just stick to today's way of doing it, social networking. Social networking has really improved teens' lives. They can stay updated and not get left behind. Also, teens can do better in school if they had social networking. Score = 3 (The student’s sentences, usage, and mechanics were consistently correct, in a variety of instances.)
Student Response Social networking has not improved teenagers lives because people can get their identity stolen, cyber bullied, and could also make them less social in the real world. When teens get on social networking, they could suffer from addiction. If their device stops working and they lose social media, it could lead to depression or loneliness this could lead to actions that harm themselves or someone else. Identity theft is when someone uses another persons identity to commit crimes or to look at their personal information. Teens give out their personal information on social networking sites very often, and this is very dangerous. In passage B it says that some sites ask for sensitive information, and use it to steal your identity or can be used to commit crimes in malicious ways.
Student Response Another way social networking sites do not improve teen lives is cyber bullying. Cyber bullying is serious case where people harass, tease, or harm someone physically and mentally online. People can do this by posting or sharing something about someone else that is inappropriate. This can make a person physically injure themselves or even commit suicide. This can lead to serious consequences like serving time in prison. People might say that social networking sites are safe because they limit the information that you could put on it, but just posting something that says that your going on vacation for a week lets a thief know that your house will not have anyone in it and that it is vacant. This could also lead to identity theft by thieves being able to connect to your personal information hidden in your home, which again can be used to commit crimes in inappropriate ways.
Student Response Teens lives do not need to have social media a lot. People need to limit their time on social media and go into the real world and not a simulation. Social networking can keep people connected but can also have many consequences. These can include things like identity theft, cyber bullying, and many more. Score = 2 (Sometimes, the student lost control when trying longer sentences. When revising, he/she needs to check to be sure his/her sentences make sense.)
Student Response Honestly social media is a bad thing. A person puts to much personal information out into the world. Like passage A said "virtual spaces where teens meet, chat, view or post photos, exchange personal stories, ect." Them things can get out there and stuff like identity theft can happen. as in passage B, these thefts can take everything of yours, including your credit card that has all your money. Score = 1 (The student’s essay would be better if he/she worked on using correct noun and verb forms.)
Score Point 0 • Blank • Copied • Too Limited to Score/Illegible/Incomprehensible • Non-English/Foreign Language • Off Topic/Off Task/Offensive
Let’s Practice • Read the response. • Using the rubric, INDEPENDENTLY decide how you would score the paper. • When everyone has finished, compare the scores at your table. • Discuss results.
Practice 1 Do you think that social networking activities have improved teenagers lives? Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Snapchat have all become a way of communication within the new generation of teenagers, But is it worse than the way it was before we had all this? Were the times of sending a letter and waiting for a few days to get one answer better than today? With all the forms of communication we have today there is no distance to great that we can't have a conversation with someone. I think that the world we live in now with the technology we have is way better than the time of writing letters and sending emails of the family computer. Now we have that "family computer" in our pocket in the form of a phone and along with that phone we have new forms of communication. We can send a text one minute and the next be receiving an answer from that person. We can get on Facebook, Instagram or twitter and see what is happening all around the world in a matter of seconds.Back in the day what would you do if you didn't know how to do something? Did you have to stop what you are doing and wait for someone or did you have to go ask someone for help?
Practice 1, continued Now if there is something you don't know how to do all you have to do in hop on YouTube and right there at your fingertips you have the answer to all your problems. Going to the store is becoming a thing of the past as well, we have the ability to order something and have it show up our house on that day or within a day or two. There are downfalls to doing all this though, with having all these ways for us to have personal information stolen. By making large purchases on line you are exposing yourself and all your information, but there are ways to protect yourself from this. One way is to always keep your information on private and when making large purchases online be sure to be on a secure network. Also when signing up for social medias make sure to give only the information that you feel comfortable giving. Your privacy is your choice be sure to keep it that way.
Practice 2 Online social networking has improved teenagers' lives. Though it has its downsides, through the use of the internet, teens are able to easily acquire information that would have been harder to locate before, and they have access to many diverse groups of people to socialize with. They are made much more aware of the world around them, and establishing friendships with more people is made much easier. One of the most popular examples of the internet being an improvement of people's lives is that it is a huge source of information. While before, someone may have had to locate different books or articles that may not have even been available near them in order to learn about a subject, it is now possible to access all of that information and more from their own home. Said information is also constantly being updated while a book centered around, for example, a specific area of science could easily become outdated as time goes on. While it was reported in a survey in 2014 that 49% of teenagers between the ages of 12 and 17 learned false information on the internet, this problem can easily be corrected through simply doing more research, checking sources, and correcting whatever source said false information came from.
Practice 2, continued All of the new social media sites also feature people from all around the world. Through these sites, someone is exposed to more diverse groups of people and much different ways of thinking. Along with that, forming long-distance friendships and relationships from across the country, or even between two separate countries, is made much easier as social interaction is promoted an incredible amount online. 46% of teenagers even agree that "sites encourage social awareness and community involvement." People are overall made much more aware of the world around them and the cultures that exist outside of them. One problem arising with online social networking, however, is identity theft. With people creating many different accounts across all these different sites, they are making themselves big targets for this crime. According to Passage A, "28% [of teenagers] have had personal information unknowingly shared with companies." This information is able to be sold and used against them without their knowledge. This issue is further confirmed in Passage B, which says, "With only limited information in the profile (name, place of birth, and year), a thief has ample information to steal a person’s identity." Any posts made on social media can be harmful if identity theft were to occur, no matter how innocent the post can seem.
Practice 2, continued However, specific actions can be taken in order to avoid identity theft, such as using different passwords for each site, using credit protection services if possible, and monitoring any credit card and bank statements regularly. There are inevitably some problems that accompany the use of online social networking. However, it has improved teenagers lives. Everything has some problems and nothing is perfect, and the good that social media brings outweighs the bad. People have more access to information than ever before, and they are given the chance to interact and form relationships with all kinds of people. The internet can even lead to someone learning more about themselves through contact with people who experience the same issues and through trustworthy sources online. Social networks have proven themselves to be helpful and worthwhile to many people.
Practice 3 No it hasn't improved teenagers lives. 40% of teenagers spend at least a hour on social media a day if not more. also 49% of people learn false information about other people on social media. with the information you put on social media over 360,000 people had there identity stole in 2012. but the good part is its a good way to connect with friends and family it also keeps you entertained.
Practice 4 Do you think social media is good for you? Social media is the top thing everybody is focused on know a days. Teenagers talk on social media more than they talk face-to-face. Social networking activities has not improved teenagers' lives because grades have decreased, cyber-bullying, stolen information. Most people may argue that social network is good for them because it keeps them entertained, but most of those are the wrong things. Most teenager entertain drama and other bad things, but could end up in trouble for doing that. If someone was arguing on Facebook, and a lot of teenagers are entertaining it like laughing, commenting, or liking it they could end up in trouble or get the ones that was arguing in more trouble. In Passage A: "Information about Social Networking" says,"40% spends a average of one hour per day on social media." Which means many teenagers are able to see and entertain the drama. Most teenagers focus on social networks more than they focus on their school work. In Passage A: Information about Social Networking it states," 20% report that social networking activities have negatively affected their grades." When grades go down, students’ futures can really suffer. They might not get into college.
Practice 4, continued In Passage B it also excliaim, "Teens are often share personal information via sites such as Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram." When teenagers share personal information really bad things can happen. In Passage B: "Identity Theft and Social Media" it says "In 2011 a Carnegie Mellon study of more than 40,000 children report that children under the age of 18 were twice as often victims of identity theft." If your identity is stolen, people can take out loans or credit cards in your name. That can ruin your future. In conclusion, social networking activities did not improve teenagers' lives it made some bad such as bad grades, cyberbullying, and stolen information. You might think social networking is good but its really bad. Try to limit to limit the usage of social networking.
Reflect • How will you use insights gained today in your classroom? • What questions do you still have? • Reflect, then discuss with colleagues, then share out large group.
Julie Bazemore Georgia Center for Assessment Julie.bazemore@uga.edu
