Simple Tips while choosing a guy girl in arranged marriage

1. Simple Tips while choosing a guy/girl in arranged marriage How much ever Bollywood/Hollywood romantic movies inspire us, how much ever attempts we make to ‘patofy’ a girl, how many times we dream of having a love marriage, how much ever maybe the rise of live-in relationships…the fact of 2024 remains that around 80% of marriages in India still happen to be ‘ARRANGED MARRIAGE’ So having accepted this fact, how and what does one do while choosing the right boy/girl through arranged wedding? Here is what we can do while choosing the right guy/girl when families try to arrange marriage! Choosing the guy/girl for arranged marriage: @Boys – When you meet the girl for the first time, please don’t start with asking the sterotype Q’s like “what do you expect from your life partner”, “do you know cooking”, “what you expect from the marriage” etc etc. First make her feel comfortable with you, so start with topics which would interest her. Discuss about the latest good movie running these days. If she is active on Instagram, ask her about the various influencers and famous accounts she loves to follow. If she enjoys watching any OTTs like Netflix or Amazon Prime, ask her about the various series that she enjoys watching. If she is a Bollywood fan, keep discussing on what she likes about Shraddha Kapoor or Alia Bhat or Deepika; and ask about her favorite actors like Ranbir, Ranvir, etc. Girls love to discuss on such topics. Else you can go to the most boring yet safe question asked since time immemorial – What about your hobbies? Her stiff body language would ease up and she would start behaving her own self. You would be marrying this girl, so she needs be her own self when she is talking with you. As the conversation hits from there, you would surprisingly get the answers of your sterotype

2. questions in the midst of your talk . If you don’t get it, when conversation extends, you can sneak in your sterotype Q’s Being funny is not everyone’s cup of tea but cracking a joke here and there, lightens the situation a lot. Memorizing the WhatsApp forward jokes are not necessary, even narrating real life funny incidents can also do the needful. Discussing on any recent funny memes would also work. MOST IMPORTANTLY..please be your own self! In arranged marriage, you both might not get many chances to meet, that she can know the ‘real you’ after every new meeting. If she has to like you, it has to be the real you. If you are shy,so be it! Some girls find shy really cute. DONTS- Try avoiding bragging about yourself. You might be the next start-up millionaire, but no need to showcase it. It is a big turn-off for many girls. If she has to get impressed by you, she definitely will get, without your bragging. Hiding things. Honesty is highly needed in an arranged marriage. Some things can’t be told in the first meeting, but they have to told in the next meetings for sure. Wear clothes which you usually wear. No need to wear a formal clothes to prove that you are a good boy. Don’t judge the girl highly on looks. After 15 years, neither you nor she are going to look great. Always look for qualities by which she can be a great companion for the next 50 years of your married life. Of course she needs to carry herself well, is what you need to check @Girls – Ideally when you meet for the first time the guy is supposed to break the ice, but not all boys may be outspoken. So there is no harm in you yourself doing the honors of breaking the ice. Always remember that you both have positively come to meet each other, so both would be tensed, excited and positively looking forward. Indian boys are typically interested in cricket, video games , binge watching, social media reels, food and Nora Fatehi ? . Of course you need not discuss the last topic .

3. Girls are mostly lesser interested in cricket and gaming ; so movies, OTT series, social media reels and food happens to be common topic very often! You never know how amazingly you can hit off, once you find a strong common point of interest. Another set of highly crucial questions every girl must ask are: –How many siblings do you have? (because in few cases, post marriage the husband’s unmarried sister can make the wife’s life tough) – Was your mother working in a job or not? (because in few cases, a housewife mother-in- law may not positively support the wife in doing professional job) Now I must admit that it tougher for a girl to actually analyze if the boy is faking or is he genuine or not. Your parents will only see if the boy is earning well and if he comes from a decent family. They always tend ignore other things. So the onus is only on you to find if the guy’s nature is good or not, is he genuine, is his nature compatible with my nature, etc. How on earth do you find it out? Take your time here and don’t get carried away. Because a fake person cannot carry out his bluff for a longer period of time. Try thinking more from head than from heart. Consult sensible and mature people in your life about this prospect and his nature. Don’t take advice from dumb girls. DONTS- Please don’t probe much into his job and profession. For sure, your parents will do that job for you. Although salary is a critical factor, don’t make him feel like he is sitting in a job interview. In an Indian arranged marriage, the highest criteria for a ideal groom is his salary. My suggestion- don’t give it so much high preference. He might be highly qualified, just that he hasn’t got his right break till now. So judge him overall for his professional growth. So do ask him – What are your career aspirations? You can identify to some extent – is he toxically workaholic/ positively career oriented/ not serious about future. Hell with the looks, only check if he carries himself well with the whatever looks God has given him.

4. If you had already prepared a list of 10 points that you seek in your potential husband, and if the guy in front fulfills even 6/10 or 7/10 of the points….marry that guy. You can never get 9/10 or 10/10. When the engagement happens- “Time” is biggest problem in arranged marriage. You get to spend little time with this guy/girl and as soon as things seem positive by then, parents get you both engaged. Well, we can’t do anything with it and have to live with this issue. But please try and keep a little long gap between engagement and marriage i.e. courtship period. It is the most beautiful period of your life, when things are clicking with you both. You would love it. That is one good reason, why you need a little long courtship period. If things aren’t clicking well within you both, then take your time. Please analyze each other’s priorities. Most importantly, if things go really very bad between you and everything is going out of hand, then its OK, you can OPT OUT from the marriage. Its better to have broken engagement, than marrying the wrong person So summarizing the entire blog, please go ahead and successfully get into this sacred and great institution called Arranged Marriage. Feel free to ask me any doubts by commenting on my blog or best would be to directly call or Whatsapp me on +91-9970838025 Also, I am conducting an online webinar to help you with better mentoring and detailed steps to find the right partner in arranged marriage. Directly register on this link below for the free webinar session – https://deepeshchandran.com/Arranged_Marriage_Consultancy/ TO Know More: https://deepeshchandran.com/ TO Know More: https://deepeshchandran.wordpress.com/2014/06/14/simple-tips- while-choosing-a-guygirl-in-arranged-marriage/