Write about an event in your life that changed you.

1. Write about an event in your life that changed you. Be as specific as possible, using as much detail as possible…

2. Best college admission essays: www.petersons.com (look under education) Sample essays

3. Moment in time—grab the attention of the reader • Story—sensory diction, visual • Reflection—futuristic • What has this done to you now? • What will it do in the future? Essay basics

4. Defining Moments

5. Epiphany • Unforgettable conversations • Change in family • Change in geography • Failure • Death Ideas to get started

6. Who are you personally? What can you personally do for the university? • DO NOT talk about other things that are shown on your app • First paragraph is key… dean of admin is reading and they want to be captivated by the first paragraph. • Reflection… • You are writing to a complete stranger.. they don’t know your circumstances, they don’t know anything, so you can feel comfortable—you’ll never meet this person. What they want to know

7. What does this event mean to you now? • How do you cope with this memory? • Have you used this memory/moment to mentor younger students or siblings? • How do you think this might affect you in the future? • What scares you about it? • Is there a pattern you see in life? (divorce, addiction, gambling, etc.) How to REFLECT

8. What colleges look for

9. I had gone my whole life knowing my father wasn’t the most stable person. Although he was able to maintain a job consistently and take care of us for the most part, my father is an abusive alcoholic which makes it difficult for him to be a part of my life. Despite his flaws, I trusted that he would have told me something as important as what I just discovered. It’s the second week of my sophomore year. It’s lunch time and I just met up with my friends and we are still adjusting to the excitement of the new school year. I’m listening to my friend talk about some summer-time adventure they had had, when a senior I recognized from my freshman Geometry class and one of his friends walks up to me. At first, I’m sort of annoyed; he is asking me questions about my dad. I felt like he must have been stalking me to know what he did. I was very uncomfortable with a stranger knowing this much about my family. Then he blurted it out. His name is Jack Kramer and he is my brother. Sample intro

10. Imagine being four again; young, care-free, innocent to the world and its troubles with two loving parents who would do anything in the world for you. Now imagine dull white walls, dim lights, and long depressing hallways. These will be the images instilled into me forever from when I was four. Very different from the care-free, innocent, and playful memories of the stereotypical four year old. These images put together the scenery of the hospital where my mom suffered many years ago. A moment that I will always remember vividly. As I embraced this moment of approaching my mom’s room I knew this would be the last time I would see her. It was an incredibly intense realization for a four year old to know, he would grow up raised by a single parent, and no mom. But this isn’t just my story. This is every AVID student’s story. Sample intro

11. I will never forget the day my father left the house for the last time. Jordan hysterically cried while blaming herself and my mother was screaming and yelling around the house breaking everything that had crossed her path. I come from a broken home, one that offered only hostility and chaos. All I knew was abuse, neglect, drug use; homelessness was not a mystery to me. I yearned for a "normal" life filled with success and peace, with a father who comes home every night and a mother who tucks you in at the end of each day. Once my father left us for heavier drugs and another woman, things continued to spiral further downward. My mother, sister and I became homeless, which led to Jordan's and my ending up in foster care. Despite all of this, I have decided I want to break the cycle; I want to thrive. I never want to serve time in a jail and I definitely never want to rely on illicit activity to support myself. Sample intro