Navigating Challenges of Parenting a Teen in the Church

1. www.kevinhinckley.com

2. Pictures from Big Lou’s childhood …Little League

3. An recent email I have a 20-year-old son that is attending BYU in Utah. He has has been raised in an active LDS family and given every opportunity that a teen can be given. He is good looking and was always attracted to the "popular crowd". His friends are not members of the church and do not have the same morals or standards we have. He has been active in the church throughout high school even though he hung out with these friends and copied their morals and standards when he’s with them. He is "in a relationship" with his girlfriend here at home and won't go out with any girls in Utah. In fact, this girlfriend has made trips to Utah to see him, and her mother has called him telling him how much she misses him and how much her daughter misses him. He tells his father and I that he wants to come home this summer and enroll at the local university where the girlfriend goes part-time. I fear that he will end up marrying her, not serve a mission and leave the church completely. What do I do?

4. From last week:Four Keys to Effective Prayer. Step 1: Know Your Needs (Humility) Step 2: Know Your Redeemer (Trust) Step 3 Know His Tender Mercies Toward You (Gratitude) Step 4 Know His Voice (Listen)

5. Book of Mormon Timeline Mormon’s Original Abridgement Book of Lehi Book of Nephi Book of Jacob Book of Somebody Book of Mosiah Small Plates of Nephi

6. 1828 Martin Harris helps with the translation process Lucy Harris pressures Martin to see manuscript Martin asks Joseph who asks the Lord Lord says no Martin asks Joseph who asks the Lord Lord says no Martin asks Joseph who asks the Lord Lord says show only to 4 people Martin breaks promise, Lucy steals Joseph loses plates and rights to translate for several months

7. From Mother Smith’s Autobiography "Joseph who had not expressed his fears till now, sprang from the table, exclaiming, 'Martin, have you lost that manuscript? Have you broken your oath, and brought down condemnation upon my head as well as your own?‘ "'Yes; it is gone,' replied Martin, 'and I know not where.‘ "'Oh, my God!' said Joseph, clinching his hands. 'All is lost! all is lost! What shall I do? I have sinned--it is I who tempted the wrath of God. I should have been satisfied with the first answer which I received from the Lord; for he told me that it was not safe to let the writing go out of my possession.' He wept and groaned, and walked the floor continually. "At length he told Martin to go back and search again. "'No'; said Martin, 'it is all in vain; for I have ripped open beds and pillows; and I know it is not there.' "'Then must I,' said Joseph, 'return with such a tale as this? I dare not do it. And how shall I appear before the Lord? Of what rebuke am I not worthy from the angel of the Most High?' "I besought him not to mourn so, for perhaps the Lord would forgive him, after a short season of humiliation and repentance. But what could I do to comfort him, when he saw all the family in the same situation of mind as himself; for sobs and groans, and the most bitter lamentations filled the house. However, Joseph was more distressed than the rest, as he better understood the consequences of disobedience. And he continued pacing back and forth, meantime weeping and grieving, until about sunset, when, by persuasion, he took a little nourishment. "The next morning, he set out for home. We parted with heavy hearts, for it now appeared that all which we had so fondly anticipated, and which had been the source of so much secret gratification, had in a moment fled, and fled forever." (History of Joseph Smith by His Mother, p127-129) Question: What can be the effect of praying, getting an answer, then choosing to do something else instead?

8. Book of Mormon Timeline Mormon’s Original Abridgement Book of Lehi 116 Pages of Lost manuscript Book of Nephi Book of Jacob Book of Somebody Book of Mosiah Small Plates of Nephi

9. Foreknowledge Needed Martin Harris’ heart Lucy Harris’ intentions Joseph’s heart, response, and repeated questions Lessons Joseph would need to learn That 116 pages of translation would be completed and what they would cover Nephi’s (and other author’s) obedience

10. Editor’s Note Looking at the great amount of events that needed to be understood so the that the Book of Mormon could survive Lucy Harris’ theft, we need to then trust that the Lord can know what we need, our future and the events that need to transpire “for our good”.

11. Question Think about heavenly answers you would like from the Lord… Does the Lord know your heart? …your needs? …your future? …the growth you need? …your potential? …the hearts and needs of others around you? So, just what are you praying for?

12. Editor’s Notes For our prayers to be more effective, the less we tell the Lord what we need (since He already knows our needs), and the more we ask Him what He wants us to do, the better.

13. Elder Gene R. Cook I have a wonderful friend whose daughter began to be wayward when she was about fifteen years old. How this good mother prayed, along with her husband, that this girl would walk the straight and narrow path. However, the girl's agency was in play, and she determined that she wanted to participate in worldly things. And that's exactly what she did. The mother increased her faith, increased her prayers, increased her fasting, but seemingly to no avail. She felt her prayers were not answered. Her daughter went astray even more and participated in all the worldly things in which a wayward young lady might participate. Fortunately for this woman, she went on praying. About five years later, this young lady was touched by the Spirit, repented of her sins, fell in love with a young returned missionary, and was ultimately married in the temple. This entire process took about ten years. Were the mother's prayers answered? Were they consecrated for her good? I bear testimony that they were and that the Lord does answer prayers—but many times not in the way men desire, nor according to the timetable men would choose.Receiving Answers to Our Prayers ( 1996)