Six Characteristics of Strong Relationships

1. Six Characteristics of Strong Relationships

2. Appreciation & Respect • Appreciation: • To have gratitude; thankful recognition towards someone Looks like in a relationship… Recognition of day to day behaviors • Respect • To regard someone favorably or to have a sense of worth towards someone Looks like in a relationship.. How you are treated day to day Creates feelings of Love Warmth Closeness

3. Appreciation & Respect con’t • Absence of these characteristics leads to a vicious cycle • Negative behavior produces a negative reaction; which produces more negative behavior • Do we take our loved ones for granted in our relationships? • How do you feel when you are unappreciated or disrespected?

4. Shared Morals & Values • Morals are the “glue” of a relationship. Their purpose tells people what you will/not tolerate. • What will you “draw” the line on? • What does forgiveness mean to you?

5. Morals & Values con’t Morals are demonstrated through actions and behaviors • Individuals who are lacking acceptance of themselves may compromise their morals b/c they are “lost,” “confused,” or “scared.” • If individuals improve their feelings towards themselves; their “moral compass” is more defined and will help with decision making

6. Morals & Values con’t • Do “Opposites Attract?” • It’s appropriate to have different interests; but having the same morals will strengthen the bond

7. Commitment • Purpose: • Improves the quality of the relationship • Commitment means… • Monogamy • Love not infatuation • A relationship is taken to the next level (not sexually) • Assumption that the relationship will last a “long time.” • Willingness to let your partner to know and accept your vulnerabilities

8. Spending Time Together • Purpose… • Nurtures your commitment to one another • Discover what you share or have in common (compatibility) • Discover how you’ll be respected and appreciated • Determine what type of communication skills are used • It’s FUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

9. Blocks of Time “Blocks of Time”

10. Spending Time Together con’t How is Happiness defined? • Balance between work and love How is Happiness achieved? • “Painful” compromise. If the way you spend your time is “out” of balance, then what are you willing to change in order to regain the balance? Myth of Quality vs. Quantity • Make the time you spend with loved ones count

11. Communication= Conflict Resolution Skills • Unhealthy responses to conflict are characterized by: • An inability to recognize and respond to matters of great importance to the other person • Explosive, angry, hurtful, and resentful reactions • The withdrawal of love, resulting in rejection, isolation, shaming, and fear of abandonment • The expectation of bad outcomes • The fear and avoidance of conflict

12. Communication & Conflict Resolution Skills con’t Fair fighting: Ground rules Remain calm.= Time OUT/ Time IN • Try not to overreact to difficult situations. By remaining calm it will be more likely that others will consider your viewpoint. Avoid accusations = I FEEL statements • Accusations will cause others to defend themselves. Instead, talk about how someone's actions made you feel Be a better listener = EMPATHY • Repeat the other person’s words, and ask if you have understood correctly. • Resist the temptation to interject your own point of view

13. Crisis Management All Relationships experience stress. The question is… “How will the additional stress affect the relationship?” • How is communication affected? • How is appreciation/respect affected? • How is spending time together affected? • How is commitment affected?