SIBLING SEXUAL ABUSE

1. SIBLING SEXUAL ABUSE

2. Why Might This Type of Abuse Be Unique • Interacts with family dynamics • Victim and perpetrator will have ongoing relationship • There will be issues around family separation and family reunification

3. How Much Do we Really Know • There is little research on sibling sexual abuse • Research limited, often not specific to sibling sexual abuse, and often quite old • Much of the information from studies of: • Incest • Juvenile Sexual Offenders • Sibling abuse (physical and sexual)

4. Definitions • Includes stepsiblings, half siblings, and cousins • Nonconsensual • Severe

5. Nonconsensual Age Differences • 3 - 5 years • Florida law Power Difference • Favored Child • Caretaker Child • Differences in strength, size, gender, intelligence, or developmental sophistication

6. Nonconsensual Coercion • Threats • Force • Injury • Manipulation • Bribes

7. Severity • Type of Activity • Frequency

8. Severity Type of Activity • Intercourse • Oral Sex • Other Penetration • Can include “hands-off abuse” (ex. indecent exposure, forcing the sibling to watch pornography, taking pornographic pictures of sibling)

9. Severity Frequency • Repeated instances • Compulsive and interferes with normal activities

10. Models Nurturant or Psuedoconsentual Abuse • Repeated consensual contact over time • Sexual activity provides affection, contact and support (i.e. critical emotional needs) missing in children’s relations with parents • The behavior often begins with elements of loyalty, mutual satisfaction, and support Power-Oriented • May be to experience power in its own sake • May be to compensate for the abuser’s own sense of powerlessness or past abuse

11. Prevalence • Little information is known about the specific prevalence of sibling sexual abuse • It is more likely to go underreported and ignored • Older brother, younger sister most common, although all possible dyads occur • Anecdotally, it appears to occur at all levels of income and education, and across all ethnicities • Court Sample – 2/3 Sex Batt 1/2 L&L’s

12. What Do We Know About Sibling Offenders • No single “type” of abusive sibling • Sibling offenders have been found to have a diverse variety of personality characteristics

13. Sibling offenders • often have experienced past trauma or maltreatment • have not always been sexually abused themselves • are very likely to have been physically abused • may have experienced neglect and isolation • may have access to pornography • may be isolated and not relate well with peers • average age of 15 ?! (Caffaro & Conn-Caffaro, 1998)

14. Favoritism • They may be favored and feel immune from detection or consequences if they target a scapegoated sibling • They may feel rejected and retaliate against a weaker sibling

15. Research Comparing Sibling with Extra-familial Offenders • The literature that does exist typically summarizes case studies • O’Brien (1991) compared: • sibling offenders • youth who abused peers and adult

16. Behavior of Sibling offenders O’Brien found: • Committed more acts of abuse over a longer period of time • More likely to have penetrated their victims • More likely to have 2 or more victims • Less likely to have had court-ordered treatment • O’Brien speculated that opportunity and the nature of sibling and family dynamics may have contributed to these findings

17. Characteristics of Sibling Offenders O’Brien found: • More likely to have been physically abused • Only a small percentage of O’Brien’s sample reported that they had been sexually abused by a family member

18. Characteristics of Sibling Offenders’ families • O’Brien found: • Parents, especially mother’s, were much more likely to have been physically abused • 36% of mother’s of sibling offenders versus 9% of extra-familial offenders • 10% versus 5.5% of fathers • Rate of family dysfunction higher in sibling sexual abuse families

19. What Do We Know About Sibling Victims • Average age of victim is 7 - 9 (De Jong, 1988; Caffaro &Conn-Caffaro, 1998) • Sexual abuse is likely to have been more severe and/or frequent (O’Brien, 1991) • Consequences especially severe and traumatizing if force or aggression involved

20. Sibling Victims Laviola (1989) in a study of brother sister incest found: • Force and aggression more likely to be associated with intercourse • With force - victim likely to feel very negatively toward sibling and the behavior • But less severe abuse problematic as well • Less severe sexual behavior was likely to be associated with more subtle forms of coercion; Victim likely to feel ambivalent about the offender, and blame themselves for the incest

21. Consequences to the Sibling • More likely to become precociously sexualized, and act out sexually - including sexually abuse others* • More likely to exhibit disturbances of conduct* • May be come confused about their sexuality • More problems in family and romantic relationships • More sexual problems • Possible problems with emotional regulation

22. Consequences to the Sibling • More likely to runaway • More likely to experience teen pregnancy • More likely to make suicide attempts, especially between ages 14 and 16 • Frequently re-victimized throughout life, including physical abuse, rape, and domestic violence • Lower self-esteem (Most of this from general incest research)

23. What Do We Know About The Families • Providepoor supervision and little structure • Tend to have had a history of domestic violence and physical abuse • Secrets - Discourage open communication

24. Sibling Abuse Families • May fail to provide appropriate boundaries: • Extramarital affairs (76% of the sibling cases of Smith & Israel, 1987) • Parent-child hierarchies • Sleeping arrangements • Privacy for family members • Family member sexual behavior (ex. allow children to observe adult sexual behavior) • Choice of surrogate caretakers (ex. allow children to remain unsupervised with/in the care of known sibling offenders)

25. Sibling Abuse Families • Parental absence - physical or emotional • Divorce • Work • Parent dealing with own trauma • Substance abuse • Psychiatric illness • Dependent personality orders • Some researchers argue that this is the most important dynamic in sibling incest families

26. Problematic Families • Deny the allegations of abuse • Ignore or minimize the abuse • Acknowledge the abuse, but blame and/or punish the victim • Acknowledge the abuse, but fail to protect the victim and stop the abuse • When abuse is disclosed, divide into teams, (victim versus offender) which compete for power resources, and support • In the end, problematic families can leave the victim feeling unprotected, helpless, rejected, and further blamed as the victim begins to act out

27. Safety Planning • Assess victim’s comfort with the offender in the home • Assess parent’s ability to supervise appropriately • Identify internal and external risk factors

28. Common Safety Plan Elements • Offender not to supervise other children • Offender not to be left alone with younger or vulnerable children or share a bedroom with them • Vulnerable children bedroom’s will be closer to parents • Alarms may be placed on offender’s door • Family members will not shower or bathe together • Family members will dress appropriately at all times

29. Common Safety Plan Elements • Family members will knock if doors are closed • No babysitting • No changing diapers • No dressing, bathing or helping younger or disadvantaged children get ready in the morning • No sleepovers • No pornographic materials

30. Treatment • Important to distinguish between mutually consenting among similar age siblings or even age-appropriate sex play before starting • NCSBY Handout on Sexual Behavior Problems from 2 – 12

31. Cloé Madanes’ (1990) Model for Sibling Sexual Abuse Treatment • General Principals • Create a positive framework by emphasizing compassion, higher emotion, and spirituality • No secrets – Secrets allow abuse to continue • Emphasize blamelessness of the victim • Find outside protectors (for each child) • Emphasize offender responsibility and reparation • Steps can be modified depending on the situation

32. Madanes’ 16 Steps: • Obtain an account of the sexual offense(s) moving from parents, to siblings, to offender, to victim • Ask each family member why it was wrong beginning with the offender • Therapist - it was also wrong because it caused the victim spiritual pain or “pain in the heart” • Therapist - it also causes a spiritual pain in the victimizer

33. Discuss other sexual victimization that has gone on the family • Therapist – these behaviors also causes a spiritual pain in the family • The Apology – offender gets on knees in from of the victim and repents • The Apology II – other family members get down on their knees and repent for not having protected the victim • Discussing the consequences of any future abuse

34. Find a protector for the victim (e.g. responsible uncle, 2 grandmothers, etc) • Individually with victim – work to place the abuse in context and orient victim to positive things in her life • Reparation – an act of long-term sacrifice for the offender that is beneficial to the victim • Reconnecting the offender to peers and appropriate social and sexual activities

35. Restoration of the parent’s love for the offender • Restoration of the offender’s role as protective of younger sibling • Help offender to forgive him/herself

36. Wes Crenshaw, PhD (Family Therapy Institute Midwest) • Has taken the apology step and broadly applied it to a broad variety of dependency cases • Appears to have worked more frequently with cases where victim, offender, and/or have been removed from the home • Madanes had the apology take place toward the beginning of treatment - Crenshaw’s model seems to build to the apology which is seen as the heart of the intervention