Emma Soutar and Claire Cooper Southwark Floating Support 17 th June, 2009

1. Emma Soutar and Claire Cooper Southwark Floating Support 17th June, 2009

2. National domestic violence charity Largest single provider World’s first refuge – 1971 Supporting 1,000 women and children on any given day Refuge – who we are

3. Psychological services for women and children Independent advocacy Culturally specific refuges Generic refuges Freephone 24 Hr National Domestic Violence Helpline, run in partnership between Refuge and Women’s Aid Generic floating support Peripatetic staff across London Outreach services for women from Eastern Europe Sanctuary Refuge’s package of services Child support workers

4. Using intimidation: making her afraid by using looks, actions, gestures, smashing things, destroying her property, abusing pets, displaying weapons. Using emotional abuse: putting her down, making her feel bad about herself, calling her names, making her think she's crazy, playing mind games, humiliating her, making her feel guilty. Using isolation: controlling what she does, who she sees and talks to, what she reads, where she goes, limiting her outside involvement, using jealousy to justify actions. Minimizing, denying, and blaming: making light of the abuse and not taking her concerns about it seriously, saying the abuse didn't happen, shifting responsibility for abusive behavior, saying she caused it. Power and control wheel 1

5. Using children: making her feel guilty about the children, using the children to relay messages, using visitation to harass her, threatening to take children away. Using male privilege: treating her like a servant, making all the big decisions, acting like the "master of the castle", being the one to define men's and women's roles. Using economic abuse: preventing her from getting or keeping a job, making her ask for money, giving her an allowance, taking her money, not letting her know about or have access to family income. Using coercion and threats: making and/or carrying out threats to hurt her, threatening to leave her, to commit suicide, to report her to welfare, making her drop charges, making her do illegal things. Power and control wheel 2

6. The problem 2 Women killed by a current or former partner every week 25 Percent of women will be abused in their life-times 45 Percent of women who experience repeat victimisation 35 Average number of assaults before a woman seeks help

7. The problem 90 Per cent of abuse witnessed by children (where a woman has children) 1 Call received by the police in the UK every minute 15 Percent of reported violent crime that is domestic violence 23 £billion cost to the tax payer every year

8. The cost of domestic violence Including all costs, the total cost of domestic violence for the state, employers and victims is estimated at around £23 billion Criminal Justice System £1billion Health Care physical injuries £1.2 billion mental health £176 million Social Services £0.25 billion Housing £0.16 billion Civil Legal £0.3 billion Lost economic output £2.7 billion Human and emotional cost £17 billion

9. 1 woman in 4 experiences domestic violence at some point in her life. Two women are killed each week in England and Wales by a current or former partner. Domestic violence accounts for almost a one in six incidents of reported violent crime. In 90% of domestic violence incidents where a woman has children, they are in the same or next room. The statistics

10. On average a woman is assaulted 35 times before she seeks police help. The most common cause of death in victims of domestic violence is strangulation. Domestic Violence is the most under reported crime in the UK. The statistics

11. Impacts on a woman - practical Physical injury Homelessness Unemployment Poverty Substance abuse Social isolation

12. Impacts on a woman - emotional Anxiety Post-traumatic stress Low self esteem Depression Self harm Suicide

13. Impacts on children

14. Impacts on children Building relationships Depression Learning Anxiety Social skills Development Post-traumatic stress Self-harm Attitudes Substance abuse Behaviour

15. Why do women stay? Low confidence Fear Community Access to money Threats to take children Keep children with father Isolation Unaware of options Nowhere to go

16. Myth: Alcohol and drugs make men violent Myth: He hit her because he was under stress Myth: She provoked him, she made him angry Myth: It only happens in poor families on council estates Myth: Some religions allow it Myths of domestic violence

17. Surely things have changed? 2/3 Men admit they would use violence in conflict situations with partners 1/5 Young men think it’s acceptable to force their wife into sex 1/2 Young men think rape is acceptable in some circumstances

18. Surely things have changed? 1/10 Men think it’s ok to rape a woman if he’s too turned on to stop 1/8 Men think it’s ok to hit a nagging woman 34 % of young men don’t think forcing someone to have sex is rape 19% of young women agree

19. In Southwark, Refuge provides: Floating support Sanctuary Scheme Court advocates Support Groups Refuge Accommodation Refuge in Southwark

20. Informal legal information Housing Family Welfare benefits Debt advice Civil and criminal remedies Emotional and psychological support Education and employment advice Sign post to specialist services Or just a listening ear Refuge floating support, Southwark

21. Referral Initial Assessment Needs Assessment Individual Support Plan Risk Assessments Safety Planning Telephone Support Refuge floating support, Southwark

22. Get help now • Southwark Floating Support • 0207 231 5514 • 0207 394 9356 • 0207 231 6847 • Fax: 0207 394 6642 • PO Box 38476, SE16 2WW • 24hour National Domestic Violence Helpline, run in partnership between Refuge and Women’s Aid: • 0808 2000 247 • www.refuge.org.uk

23. Refuge is committed to a world where domestic violence is not tolerated or ignored and where women and children can live in safety. Domestic violence is a crime. It is against the law. And it must not be ignored. Refuge’s mission