Dealing with the Reality of Job Loss

1. Dealing with the Reality of Job Loss New Opportunities

2. I can’t believe this is happening to me. • Losing your job because of a layoff is not your fault. • Yesterday you were safe, secure, and you belonged. The future was promising. • Today, you’re out. You’re on your own. Your future is scary.

3. I thought my job was important. Why is this happening to me? • Business is streamlining operations • Consolidating jobs • Layoffs are part of that process • You are a victim of the times.

4. What if I handled the news badly? • Everybody handles the news differently • Some clam up and say nothing • Some sob and cry • Some get angry and say things they later regret • Some are glad and can’t wait to start something new

5. I’m a wreck over this! • Each of us lives in a “comfort zone” – which is an emotional place • It’s a place where your work, your coworkers, and your job are routine and comfortable • Suddenly, your comfort zone has been smashed and you can’t fix it!

7. I feel so helpless. • Most of us need a few weeks to heal and get back on our feet. • You’re also in a mild state of shock. • Those who were deeply wounded by the layoff, may need a few months to heal. • During this healing time, each of us will experience different emotions.

8. The four emotional stages of loss • Shock– a disbelief that this has happened. • Anger– a feeling that you have been betrayed. • Grief– sadness over the loss of friends and co-workers. • Acceptance – a willingness to get on with your life.

9. What do I do???? Go home. Talk to your family. Get your job loss out in the open. Tell them what happened and tell them how you feel. Talk to them. Open up and you won’t feel so alone.

10. Do I have a right to be angry? Yes. Anger is a natural emotion. Once the shock of losing your job wears off, you’re going to feel anger. But – you do have to control it.

11. In your anger, you may fantasize about punching the boss in the nose, filing a lawsuit or writing a letter to the newspapers.

12. Fantasizing is one thing, doing it is another. Keep in mind, that you will need your former employer for future job references. They won’t reward you with a good reference if you do them harm.

13. What do I do with all this pent-up anger? Find a sounding board. A sounding board is a person who will listen to your complaints.

14. Don’t use your spouse, parents, or kids as a sounding board – they’ll get sick of it – and they’re too quick to offer advice. • At this point, you don’t want advice. What you want is someone who’ll just listen and sympathize.

15. So, who should I vent to? • The best sounding boards are people who have also lost their jobs. • They know how you feel. • Find those fellow victims. • Get together, scream, shout, cry, and vent that anger together. • You’ll all feel better.

16. Your Former Employer • Send two hand-written notes, one to your old boss and the other to the CEO of the company. • Thank them for your old job and all the great things you learned there. • When you need a reference for a new job, that note will speak volumes about your character.

17. How long will I feel like this? For those who were emotionally wounded by the layoff, it could take several months to get over the hurt. Let nature take its course. Take time to heal Keep busy Find a project Clean the house Sign up for courses or workshops Take up a hobby Volunteer for a cause Do something with your time.

18. How will this affect my family? You’ve lost your job. You’re feeling angry and betrayed. It’s a sure bet that you’re going to bring some of that hostility home with you. On the following pages are a few things you might want to watch out for.....

19. The Crazies When some people lose their jobs, the shock and disbelief can cause them to do some pretty crazy things.

20. People have been known to go on massive spending sprees, at a time when they most need to conserve their finances. Try not to panic or do something you may later regret. The shock usually wears off within a few days and you’ll come to your senses.

21. Rising Tension During the first few weeks after losing your job, the people you live with will be sympathetic and understanding. After this grace period, however, they’ll start to become a bit more critical.

22. Notice that you’re hanging around the house with little to do • Why you aren’t doing the household chores. • Become critical of you spending money that shouldn’t be spent. • Your teenage kids will become sick of your interference. • It will seem like everyone’s picking on you

23. Talk to your family. Find out what’s expected of you and what’s expected of them. Find a middle ground. Pull your share of the load.

24. Scapegoating Scapegoating is when you start picking on your spouse, kids, parents, or friends – not because of something they did – but, because they are easy targets.

25. Admit it, you’re angry and you’re tense. This frustration has to be vented somewhere. If it causes you to lash out at others for petty reasons, you’re scapegoating.

26. When you’re itching for an argument, get out of the house and go for a brisk walk. A brisk walk can ease the frustration, physically as well as emotionally. You might also call a laid-off friend. Talk to them, vent, they know how you feel.

27. Jealousy Here’s a touchy subject. Like it or not, here it is: Some married men who lose their jobs become jealous of their working wives. They no longer see themselves as the breadwinner. Sometimes they tend to belittle their spouse, and minimize the importance of her job.

28. Then too, some wives are resentful of their unemployed husbands. They see themselves having to take full charge of supporting the family and it can seem overwhelming.

29. Women who lose their jobs, cope better. They are less likely to be resentful of their working husbands. The best way to handle jealousy is to talk about it. Redefine temporary roles. Establish new responsibilities and duties. Make an effort to show some respect and appreciation for the other person and how they might feel.

30. Rage When the crazies, the tension, scapegoating, and jealousy mount, rage can boil over. Rage is uncontrolled anger. Nasty, unforgivable, things may be said in the heat of rage. Physical violence is also possible.

31. If you suspect that tension is rising in your family, get some help. Talk to your clergyman or visit a family counselor. Look in the Yellow Pages under “Counselors”. Don’t let a simple stint of unemployment ruin your marriage, your family, your health or possibly your life.

32. Finances Have you ever wondered how the typical American family spends its paycheck? Food – 14% Housing – 33% Apparel – 4% Transportation and auto – 19% Health Care – 6% Entertainment – 5% Education – 2% Donations – 3% Insurance & pension – 9% Miscellaneous – 5%

33. Review your finances • Add up your monthly income • List your monthly expenses • Establish the gap

34. Not enough to make ends meet? You have four options: Reduce your spending and live within your new means Find extra money to reduce your cash gap Ask your creditors to reduce your bills Get help from a non-profit credit counselor

35. Reduce Your Spending • Go frugal • Turn off lights • Wash a full load of clothes/dishes • Use a fan instead of AC • Find a great price on gasoline • Stop using credit cards • Plan a weekly menu • Use coupons • Stay away from restaurants and malls • Trim your entertainment

36. Find Extra Money to Reduce the Cash Gap • Collect old debts • Turn unwanted things into gold: • Take an inventory of the things you no longer need • Run an ad on eBay • Have a yard sale • Unload family jewels • Change your lifestyle

37. Call Your Creditors • Job loss is a real crisis: If you inform people early on and ask for help, they will work with you. • Call your creditors before they call you • Don’t let the credit managers set the amount for you – tell them how much you can afford

38. Get Help from a Non-Profit Credit Counselor • You don’t have to be in debt to ask for help • Credit counselors are good listeners • Counseling is surprising affordable • Creditors prefer to work with a counselor How to choose a credit counselor: The National Foundation for Consumer Credit – www.nfcc.org The Association of Independent Consumer Credit – www.aiccca.org The Better Business Bureau – www.BBBonLine.org

39. Who would want to hire a has-been like me? Henry Ford once said, “Think you can or think you can’t – either way, you’re right.” If you think you’re a loser, you’ll lose. If you think you’re a winner, you’ll win. Think like a winner. You are what you think you are.

40. Disappointment has a door. The door opens to opportunity. Find the door and open it. A job loss could lead to a new career or a better place to work.

41. Where can I expect to find a job? After losing a job, lots of people think about switching to a new line of work. Whether you’re happy with your current line of work or not, it’s nice to know that there are other possibilities.

42. Should I look for a new line of work? • This is a great time to look at your options. • Check out the PA Department of Labor’s occupational handbook that lists projected demand occupations. • If you are not sure of an occupation – take an interest assessment test to determine which direction to start.

43. Network – talk to people who are already in the field that you are interested in. Ask them questions about the pros and cons of the work – wages – advancement, etc.

44. Will I need a résumé? A résumé has one purpose – to open the door to a job interview. It’s your sales brochure. It should offer just enough information to whet the employer’s interest and make them want to meet you. The best résumé is a résumé that gets read.

45. Did you know that most employers spend only ten seconds reading each of the résumés that they receive? A good résumé gives you a fighting chance and a competitive edge against other job seekers. It shows what you can do for an employer – skills, abilities and potential.

46. Give your résumé a KISS Keep it Sweet & Simple • Give the page a clean and easy-to-scan look • Tell who you are and where you can be reached. • Tell what kind of work you’re looking for. • Show what you have to offer. • Tell about the jobs you have had. • Tell about your education. • Tell about any special skills you have. • Do not list references on your résumé.

47. How can networking help me find a job? • Did you know that approximately three-quarters of all job openings are never advertised? • A lot of employers prefer to hire people recommended by their employees. • They count on their employees to pre-screen and recommend good people. It helps cut down on hiring poor workers.

48. How do you get one of those insider jobs? Network! Reach out and connect to the people you know. Talk to them about job opportunities where they work. Let them know that you are available. Ask for their help. Networking is more effective than answering a newspaper ad or a job listing on the web.

49. Network Contacts Spouse Parents Cousins – Aunts – Uncles Friends Neighbors Doctor – Lawyer Teachers Clergy Banker Retailers City officials Beautician – Barber Postman Politicians

50. Okay, I have the names of a few hot employers. How do I get an interview? • Is it okay to pick up the phone and give an employer a call? Absolutely!! • Let it be your direct line to a job interview. • Prepare for a little rejection – not all employers will be willing to see you. Practice makes perfect – so the more you call – the better you will get.