Dying well John Wyatt

1. Dying well John Wyatt

2. Britons terrified by death Britons are a nation terrified by death, a survey suggests. The poll carried out by New Scientist magazine found that 67% of British people are petrified by the prospect of dying.

3. Positive “religious coping” was associated with increased preference for heroic medical treatment, lower rates of “do not resuscitate” orders and increased use of intensive life-prolonging care in the last week of life.

4. ‘The most common Bible verse that families put on funeral announcements or read at services is “I have fought the good fight” (2 Timothy 4:7). Except they are not talking about spiritual things… They mean this person tried every medical option to stay alive’. Rob Moll

5. “The body of the dying person has become the battlefield where heroic doctors and nurses wage their ceaseless war against death”. Alan Verhey

6. Discussion questions • What are the social, cultural and spiritual forces that are driving people to see suicide and euthanasia as the best way to die? • Why are religious believers more likely than secular people to insist on futile and invasive medical treatment at the end of life?

7. Euthanasia is intentional medical killing, of a person whose life is thought not to be worth living.

8. Euthanasia is not the same as:1. Withdrawing medical treatment which is futile or burdensome, or where the patient is “actively dying”. This is good medical care.

9. Balancing the benefits and burdens of medical treatment Benefits Burdens of treatment of treatment

10. Euthanasia is not the same as: 2. Giving pain-killing treatment in order to benefit the patient which may have the unintended side effect of shortening life. This is the principle of double effect – recognising the difference between intention and foresight.

11. Christian ethics (the way we are called to treat one another)comes from Christian anthropology (the way we have been created)

12. In Christian thinking a human life is not just a gift of God’s grace – it is a reflection of his being.

13. ‘Whoever sheds the blood of man,  by man shall his blood be shed;  for in the image of God has God made man.’ Genesis 9:6

14. 'Within the story of my life I have the relative freedom of a creature, but it is not simply my life to do with as I please.... Suicide... expresses a desire to be free and not also finite - a desire to be more like the Creator than creature' Gilbert Meilaender

15. Intentional killing of an innocent human being is wrong because it contravenes the profound moral order which lies behind the structure of the universe, and which is written in our hearts.

16. In the Bible and in all societies influenced by Christianity, suicide is never glorified as a noble or honourable way to die. Self-destruction is a harm to be avoided…., not a human right to be assisted.

17. Dependence is not an alien, subhuman, undignified condition - it is part of the narrative of every human life.“Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.”Galatians 6:2

18. Ageing and infirmity The evils of old age are real evils.... ....but old age itself is not an evil – it is part of the human narrative, a stage on the journey – to be honoured, respected and even welcomed.

19. Christian thinking about death The death of human beings is not to be welcomed and hastened. Death is an enemy which we must fight against. But, by God's grace, death can also become a 'severe mercy', a strange kind of healing, a gateway to a new reality.

20. Palliative care “You matter because you are you and you matter to the end of your life. Not only will we help you to die well, we will help you to live before you die” Cicely Saunders “You don’t have to kill the patient in order to kill the pain.”

21. Dealing with “total pain” Physical pain Psychological pain Relational pain Spiritual - existential pain

22. In palliative care of the dying patient our intention is neither to accelerate the dying process, nor to impede it.

23. “Suffering is not a question which demands an answer, it’s not a problem which demands a solution…It’s a mystery which demands a presence” Anon

24. Ars Moriendi 1. The temptation of Doubt and the virtue of Faith 2. The temptation of Despair and the virtue of Hope 3. The temptation of Impatience and the virtue of Love 4. The temptation of Pride and the virtue of humility 5. The temptation of Greed and the virtue of letting go

25. Two additional temptations for moderns 6. The temptation of the Denial of Death and the virtue of Acceptance 7. The Temptation of Self-reliance and the virtue of Dependence

26. Dying well is an opportunity…. a time for focussing on the things which really matter to me. a time for saying sorry and being reconciled where there are relationships that need healing. a time for receiving afresh the grace and forgiveness of God. a time for fulfilling dreams that may be accomplished in the last days and weeks.

27. Dying well is an opportunity…. a time for relinquishing tasks that will not be completed in this life. a time for learning new lessons that my Father has to teach me. a time for passing on to my loved-ones the deepest concerns of my heart. a time for encouraging those who remain to serve faithfully. a time for preparing in faith, hope and love to meet my Creator, my Redeemer and my Lover face-to-face.

28. God’s plan for this age is not to abolish human suffering, but to redeem it – to bring blessing and healing out of evil and pain.

29. Dementia Whatever happens in the chances, the contingencies of life, whatever happens to my brain, my conscious experiences, my thought processes and my memory, my personhood is secure in the eternal knowledge and covenant love of God himself. I will always be “me”.

30. Dementia I am held secure in the unchangeable reality of God and his purposes which stretch from “before the foundation of the world” to the future “life of the ages”.

31. Caring for the person with dementia When I am forgetting who I am, I need you to remind me who I am and what is important to me. When I can't pray for myself I need to know that you will pray for me. I need you to reassure me that I am safe, that you will always love me and that you won't abandon me.

32. When we care for a person with dementia with genuine respect, sacrificial love and compassion - we are pointing towards the future. We are bearing witness to Christian hope. We are saying ‘This is not the end of the story – there’s more going on here than you can see’.

33. Christian love is a way of saying to another, “It’s good that you exist, it’s good that you are in the world.” Joseph Pieper

34. "Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails…." 1 Corinthians 13:7

35. “The path of the righteous is like the first gleam of dawn, shining ever brighter until the full light of day.” Proverbs 4: 18