All About Roommates

1. All About Roommates Staff Training, HR staff training, etc

2. At the first community meeting.. • Stress the importance of roommates openly communicating with each other • Ask roommates to consider the following: • Goals for the year (and how their living situation can support those goals) • Academic • Social • Mental • Physical • What each of them are involved in, their commitments, their classes etc • Have them make a list of everything they are involved in & possibly their semester schedules • Stress the importance of addressing issues immediately and seeking help as soon as they identify that they are not able to solve the issue on their own

3. At the first hall meeting.. • Discuss roommate agreements • Have each roommate write up their roommate agreement at the meeting • Make sure residents understand the importance of roommate agreements! • Give an example of when they might be used • Give examples of issues they may face in the upcoming months

4. At the hall meeting.. • Have each roommate bring (or write up at the meeting) • A list of goals they have for the year • Academic • Social • Mental • Physical • A list of what each of them are involved in, their commitments, and their classes (including first class time, lifting times, etc)

5. Example Goal List(Make sure the goals specify ‘how’) • Academic: • Get As & Bs by devoting at least 4 hours to studying daily & getting at least 6-7 hours of sleep. • Making Deans List “ ” • Social • Getting involved in a club and showing up to every meeting • Going out once a week • Mental • Seeking help from tutors, counselors, or friends when I feel stressed out • Being vocal about my needs to my teachers, friends and roommate • Physical • Lifting 2x a week • Running 3 times a week • Getting involved in a club sport spring semester

6. Example Involvement List • Classes: • Biology 150 • FYS (8:30am MWF) • Spanish 215 (9:30am TR) • Chemistry • Athletics • Varsity Cross Country (8:30am practice on Saturdays) • Potential Clubs • BBBS • Green Team • Social • Weekend night life • Friends in room after homework is done

7. Discussion & Reflection Time • Ask a few residents to list some of their goals & their commitments • Emphasis the potential stress involved in a first year experience (and that having a healthy & comfortable escape ..i.e. your bedroom.. is important) • Emphasis that each person on the hall has many different goals & commitments and that everyone must respect these differences ESPECIALLY roommates • Have roommates get together and based on their lists write up their roommate agreements • Have a few residents list off some of the things they wrote down

8. Communicate & Seek Help! • Stress again the importance of open communication • Mention that the roommate agreement sheet can help with difficult conversations & requests • Stress that seeking help as soon as possible is very important and will improve their living experience monumentally • Outline the steps of roommate mediation • Remind residents that switching is a last resort

9. Roommate Mediation • Step 1 (Between Roommates) • Roommates should be communicating clearly & frequently with each other • Roommate disagreements are normal—the best way to approach them is by addressing them right away • Roommates should always try working through their disagreements with each other first before approaching a staff member (roommates should revisit their roommate agreement form)

10. Roommate Mediation • Step 2 (Seeking a 3rd Party) • If roommates are unable to work through their issues they should immediately seek help from their RA (roommates should alert their roommate(s) that they feel the need to involve a 3rd party) • When RAs are approached with a roommate conflict/issues for the 1st time they should: • (a) Have each of the residents write out their issues/concerns/problems as well as ways they believe this problem could be resolved • (b) RAs should work with both roommates to set up individual times where they can meet. RAs should meet with each roommate separately first. (Before these individual meetings residents should email their write up of their conflict to their RA) RAs should take notes during these individual meetings • (c) RAs should work with both roommates to then set up a group meeting that both roommates attend. During this meeting each residents should bring their conflict write up/roommate agreement form, take turns expressing their concerns, then their thoughts on resolution. RAs will then work with residents to reach an agreement (make sure both residents feel that their concerns are being heard, that they feel validated and that progress was made) After the meeting both roommates should write out how they are going to go about resolving their conflict. • (d) RAs should check in with both roommates a week later to check in on their progress. RAs should also remind the residents to immediately seek help if problems arise again

11. Roommate Mediation • Step 3 (turning to the HR/AD) • If the first mediation meeting did not work, RAs must meet with their HR, show them both conflict write ups, the resolution write up, and discuss the current problem • The HR can either meeting with the residents for another roommate mediation meeting or turn to the AD for assistance. • If the HR turns to the AD for assistance the AD can choose to have another roommate mediation meeting or begin discussing relocation • Barbara Burgess can be emailed at this time so a search for an open room can begin • The roommates can also search for rooms they can switch in to

12. NOTE • A room change free is in effect for the first 2 weeks of classes each semester. • No room changes are permitted during this time • Rosters are being verified at this time by Staff • Residents should ALWAYS approach their RAs before submitting a Room Change form • This increases their chances of successfully changing rooms • This allows the RA, the HR, and the AD to advocate for their room change

13. Students Seeking a Room Change.. • Must submit a Reassignment Request Form to the Housing Coordinator (via the Residential Office in Doane) • The Reassignment Request Form can be found on my.denison.edu, under campus resources, under the Residential Education & Housing tab, under the Room Changes tab. • The Housing Coordinator is Donna Davis(davisd@denison.edu, (740) 587-6272). All forms should be turned in to Doane 101 the Residential Office where Donna works.

14. Mediation Tips • Listen • Bias = BAD • Validation is key • Show them what you are doing for them • Forward them (Do NOT cc them) on emails that you write to your HR or AD or other members on staff (other members on staff may know of other roommates that are having issues and want to switch) • Keep a physical record of all issues/concerns • This helps both with mediation and with room changes

15. Additional Resources for Residents • Whisler hall (740-587-6647) • Walk in Counseling sessions everyday 8:30am-9:30am • Campus Resources (on my.denison.edu) • Health and Counseling  Health & Counseling Resources • Yoga • Open House (Monday7:30pm — 8:45pm, Wednesday 7:30pm — 9:00pm,Thursday  4:30pm --- 5:45pm) • Buddhist/Meditation Group • Open House (Monday & Wednesday, 7:30-8:30pm, Wednesday, 7:30-8:30pm, Sunday, 7:30-8:30pm) • Religious Services • Open House