As Bencaos e Perigos do Amor 1 Corinthians 13 em Contexto da Familia, entre Amigos e no Casamento

1. As Bencaos e Perigos do Amor1 Corinthians 13 em Contextoda Familia, entre Amigos e no Casamento Convivência Igreja Presbiteriana de Itajubá Agosto 10-12, 2007

2. Sumario • Afeição (sexta noite) • Amizade (sábado noite • Eros (domingo manha) Agape

3. Objectivos 1 – Refletir sobre a realidade do Amor nas suas diferentes formas de expressao (Afeicao, Amizade, Eros) a luz das Escrituras. 2 – Buscar a presenca do Senhor em humildade nessa area que define de maneira integral nosso comprometimento com o Evangelho do Senhor Jesus. 3 – Availar, Corrigir, Confessar, Perdoar, Redimir Relacionamentos

4. 1 Corinthians 13 • 1If I speak in the tongues[a] of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames,[b] but have not love, I gain nothing. • 4Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. • 8Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. 11When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. 12Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. • 13And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

5. Fundamentos • Base do Cristianismo (Deus e Amor, Cumprimento da Lei) • Amor: Base de Comunidade Crista • Amor de Deus: Doador • Amor Humano: Doador x Necessidade • Necessidade: Nem sempre egoísta • Doador: Deficiente, Incompleto • Vida Humana: • Vida Dependente • Vida Criada

6. Fundamentos • Amor não é um uma conseqüência de sentimentos ou emoção mas da vontade. • Não precisamos “gostar” no sentido de afeição, amizade ou eros. • Amar nosso vizinho requer sacrificio. • Os amores naturais (afeicao, amizade e eros) sao: insucientes, tem ligitimidade independente (implantados em nos pelo criador), servem com escola de virtudes, e sao expressoes do amor Agape.

7. Fundamentos • Definição de Amor • A relação entre pessoas as quais – ultrapassando as demandas recalcitrantes do ego – podem gerar e manter uma comunidade de compaixão e reciprocidade. • O Segredo: Auto-Doacao • Na auto-doacao o individuo sintoniza nao so com o ritmo da criacao mas tambem do ser. Pois a Palavra Eterna se deu em sacrificio, e nao somente no Calvario - - - antes da fundacao do mundo Ele se entrega com Deus em obediencia. O que esta fora do sistema de auto-doacao nao e terreno, nem vida ordinaria, mas simplismente Inferno.

8. Fundamentos • Amores naturais: Unem pessoas mas mantem identidades separadas • Amores naturais: Necessitam de constante transformacao e correcao de curso Eros >>>> Fidelidade Afeicao >>>> Liberdade Amizade >>>> Inclusao

9. Afeicao Love (affection) is the guiding principle of true community and the central mode of relationship among persons. Love (affection) brings people together in community because it overcomes the problem of selfishness and self-centeredness.

10. Afeicao “If Christian teachers wish to recall Christian people to domesticity - and I, for one, believe that people must be recalled to it...:..- the first necessity is to stop telling lies about home life and to substitute realistic teaching.”

11. Love in the Bible Affection Love of (Proverbs 17:17;18:24; Song of Solomon 8:1) Unfaithful (Proverbs 27:10) Reuben's love for Joseph (Genesis 37:21,22) Joseph's, for his brethren (Genesis 43:30-34;45:1-5;50:19-25) Instituted by Christ (Matthew 12:50;25:40; Hebrews 2:11,12) Used by disciples (Acts 9:17;21:20; Romans 16:23; 1 Corinthians 7:12; 2 Corinthians 2:13) Peter (1 Peter 1:22) Used among the Israelites (Leviticus 19:17; Deuteronomy 22:1-4) Law concerning Levirate marriage of (Deuteronomy 25:5-10; Matthew 22:24; Mark 12:19; Luke 20:28) Relative, (Genesis 14:16;29:12) Neighbor (Deuteronomy 23:7; Judges 21:6; Nehemiah 5:7) Any Israelite (Jeremiah 34:9; Obadiah 1:10) Mankind (Genesis 9:5; Matthew 18:35; 1 John 3:15) Companion (2 Samuel 1:26; 1 Kings 13:30;20:33)

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24. By a Stock Response,[we] mean a deliberately organized attitude which is substituted for the ‘direct free play of experience’. In my opinion such deliberate organization is one of the first necessities of human life, and one of the main functions of art is to assist it. All that we describe as constancy in love or friendship, as loyalty in political life, or, in general, as perseverance – all solid virtue and stable pleasure – depends on organizing chosen attitudes and maintaining them against the eternal flux of mere immediate experience. …To me, it seems that most people’s responses are not ‘stock’ enough, and that the play of experience is too free and too direct in most of us for safety or happiness or human dignity…. That elementary rectitude of human response, ….so far from being ‘given’ is a delicate balance of trained habits, laboriously acquired and easily lost, on the maintenance of which depend both our virtues and our pleasures and even, perhaps, the survival of our species …poetry was formerly one of the chief means whereby each new generation learned, not to copy, but by copying to make, the good Stock responses.

25. Amizade • Proverbs 18:24: A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. • "In each of my friends there is something that only some other friend can fully bring out. By myself, I am not large enough to call any person completely into activity. I want other lights of my own to show all the facets. Now that Charles is dead, I shall never see Ronald's reaction to a specifically Charles joke. Far from having more of Ronald, far from having him all to myself now that Charles is away, I have less of Ronald." • “Is there any pleasure on earth as great as a circle of Christian friends by a fire?”

26. Amizade If it hadn't been for the friendship between Tolkien and Lewis, the world would likely never have seen The Narnia Chronicles, The Lord of the Rings, and much else. Interest on "fairy stories“ led these two men to want to rehabilitate them for a modern audience—adults as well as children? “Friendship is the greatest of worldly goods. Certainly to me it is the chief happiness of life. If I had to give a piece of advice to a young man about a place to live, I think I should say, “Sacrifice almost everything to live where you can be near your friends.” I know I am very fortunate in that respect.” [The Letters of C.S. Lewis to Arthur Greeves (29 December 1935)].

27. Love in the Bible Friendship General scriptures concerning Friendship (Deuteronomy 13:6-9; Job 6:14,15;16:2,20;19:13-22; Psalms 35:) Abraham and Lot (Genesis 14:14-16) Ruth and Naomi (Ruth 1:16,17) Samuel and Saul (1 Samuel 15:35;16:1) David and Jonathan (1 Samuel 18:1-4;;23:16-18; 2 Samuel 1:17-27;9:1-13) David and Abiathar (1 Samuel 22:23) David and Nahash (2 Samuel 10:2) David and Hiram (1 Kings 5:1) David and Hushai (2 Samuel 15:32-37;;17:1-22) David and Ittai (2 Samuel 15:19-21) Joram and Ahaziah (2 Kings 8:28,29;9:16) Job and his three "friends," (Job 2:11-13) Daniel and his three companions (Daniel 2:49) Mary, Martha, and Lazarus, with Jesus (Luke 10:38-42; John 11:1-46) The Marys, and Joseph of Arimathaea, for Jesus (Matthew 27:55-61;28:1-8; Luke 24:10; John 20:11-18) Luke and Theophilus (Acts 1:1) Paul and his nephew (Acts 23:16) Paul, Priscilla, and Aquila (Romans 16:3,4) Paul, Timothy, and Epaphroditus (Philippians 2:19,20,22,25)

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34. Eros “There we elders heard (among other things) what we had long despaired of hearing--a lecture on Comus which placed its importance where the poet placed it--and watched "the yonge fresshe folkes, he or she," who filled the benches listening first with incredulity, then with toleration, and finally with delight, to something so strange and new in their experience as the praise of chastity. . . . of those who heard you in Oxford many will understand henceforward that when the old poets made some virtue their theme they were not teaching but adoring, and that what we take for the didactic is often the enchanted.”

35. EROS Example of Charles Williams (intimacy) “Firstly, he was a man fitted by temperament to live in an age of more elaborate courtesy than our own. Had modern society permitted it he would equally enjoyed kneeling and being knelt to, kissing hands and extending his hand to be kissed. The ‘unbought grace of life’ was in him. But secondly, even while enjoying such high pomps, he would have been aware of them as a game: not a silly game, to be laid aide in private, but a glorious game, well worth playing. This two-edged attitude, banked down under the deliberate casualness of the modern fashion, produced his actual manners, which were liked by most, extremely disliked by a few. The highest compliment I ever heard paid to them was by a nun. She said that Mr. Williams’s manners implied a complete offer of intimacy. He threw down all his own barriers without even implying that you should lower yours. ---- This total offer of himself, but without that tacit claim which so often accompanies such offers, made his friendship the least exacting in the world, and explains the surprising width of his contacts. One kept on discovering that the unlikely people loved him as well as we did. He was extremely attractive to young women and none of his male friends ever wondered why: nor did it ever do a young woman anything but immense good to be attracted by Charles Williams.”

36. EROS Example of Wife from Great Divorce Não me lembro agora se ela estava nua ou vestida. Se estava nua, então deve ter sido a quase visível penumbra da sua gentileza e alegria que produz em minha memória a ilusão de um manto imenso e esplendoroso que a seguia por sobre a grama brilhante. Se estivesse vestida, então a ilusão de nudez é sem dúvida resultado da claridade com que seu espírito interior cintilava através das roupas. Pois as vestes naquela terra não são um disfarce: o corpo espiritual vive juntamente com cada fio e os transforma em órgãos vivos. Um manto ou uma coroa fazem parte das características do usuário, da mesma forma que um lábio ou um olho. “Não. Existem aqueles que roubam os filhos alheios. Mas a maternidade dela era de outro tipo. Aqueles com quem entrava em contato voltavam a seus pais amando-os mais. Poucos homens olhavam para ela sem se tomarem, de alguma forma, seus amantes. Mas era a espécie de amor que fazia deles maridos mais fiéis a suas mulheres e não menos.

37. EROS Consanguinous, Abraham and Sarah (Genesis 11:29;12:13;20:3,9-16) Isaac and Rebekah (Genesis 24:3,4,67;28:2) Jacob and his wives (Genesis 29:15-30) Levirate (the brother required to marry a brother's widow) (Genesis 38:8,11; Deuteronomy 25:5-10; Ruth 4:5; Matthew 22:24; Mark 12:1) Parents' consent requires in the Mosaic law (Exodus 22:17) Presents given to parents to secure their favor (Genesis 24:53;34:12; Deuteronomy 22:29; 1 Samuel 18:25; Hosea 3:2) Nuptial feasts (Genesis 29:22; Judges 14:12; Esther 2:18; Matthew 22:11,12) Jesus present at ( John 2:1-5) Ceremony attested by witnesses (Ruth 4:1-11; Isaiah 8:1-3) The groom exempt one year from military duty (Deuteronomy 24:5) Bridal ornaments (Isaiah 49:18; Jeremiah 2:32), Bridal presents (Genesis 24:53; Psalms 45:12) A herald preceded the bridegroom (Matthew 25:6), Wedding robes adorned with jewels (Isaiah 61:10) Parables from (Matthew 22:2;25:1-10) Parents contract for their children » Hagar selects a wife for Ishmael (Genesis 21:21) Parents contract for their children » Abraham for Isaac (Genesis 24) Parents contract for their children » Laban arranges for his daughters' marriage (Genesis 29) Parents contract for their children » Samson asks his parents to procure him a wife (Judges 14:2) Wives obtained » By purchase (Genesis 29:20; Ruth 4:10; Hosea 3:2;12:12), By kidnapping (Judges 21:21-23), Husbands: FAITHFUL » Isaac (Genesis 24:67), Joseph (Matthew 1:19) UNREASONABLE AND OPPRESSIVE » Ahasuerus (Esther 1:10-22) Wife: HELP (Genesis 2:18,20), FRUITFUL VINE (Psalms 128:3), The judgment denounced against Eve (Genesis 3:16) Relation of, to husband (Genesis 2:18,23,24; 1 Corinthians 11:3-12), Domestic duties of (Genesis 18:6; Proverbs 31:13-27) Beloved, by Isaac (Genesis 24:67), Beloved, by Jacob (Genesis 29:30), Hated (Genesis 29:31-33), Loyal (Genesis 31:14-16) Unfaithful (Numbers 5:14-31), Potiphar's (Genesis 39:7), Bath-sheba (2 Samuel 11:2-5), Contentious, Zipporah (Exodus 4:25), Idolatrous, Solomon's wives (1 Kings 11:4-8; Nehemiah 13:26), Jezebel (1 Kings 21; 2 Kings 9:30-37) Incorruptible, Vashti (Esther 1:10-22), Tactful Abigail (1 Samuel 25:3,14-42), Purchased (Genesis 29; Exodus 21:7-11; Ruth 4:10), Obtained by violence (Judges 21), Called » DESIRE OF THE EYES (Ezekiel 24:16)

38. 1. PURIFICATION » By abstaining from sexual intercourse (Exodus 19:15) 2. DISEASE » INSTANCES OF » Of the sexual organs (Leviticus 15;22:4; Numbers 5:2; Deuteronomy 23:10) 3. PUNISHMENT » DEATH PENALTY » For sexual immorality (Deuteronomy 22:21-24)

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47. EROS • "To say this is not to belittle the natural loves but to indicate where their real glory lies. It is no disparagement to a garden to say that it will not fence and weed itself, not prune it's own fruit trees, nor roll and cut its own lawns. A garden is a good thing but that is not the sort of goodness it has. It will remain a garden, as distinct from a wilderness, only if someone does all these things to it. Its real glory is of quite a different kind. The very fact that it needs constant weeding and pruning bears witness to that glory. It teems with life. It glows with colour and smells like heaven and puts forward at every hour of a summer day beauties which man could never have created and could not even, on his own resources, have imagined. If you want to see the difference between its contribution and the gardener's, put the commonest week it grows side by side with his hoes, rakes, shears, and packet of weed killer; you have put beauty, energy and fecundity beside dead, sterile things. Just so, our "decency and common sense" show grey and deathlike beside the geniality of love. And when the garden is in its full glory the gardener's contributions to that glory would still have been in a sense paltry compared with those of nature. Without life springing from the earth, without rain, light and heat descending from the sky, he could do nothing. When he has done all, he has merely encouraged here and discouraged there, powers and beauties that have a different source. But his share, though small, is indispensable and laborious. When God planted a garden he set a man over it and set the man under Himself. When He planted the garden of our nature and caused the flowering, fruiting loves to grow there, he set our will to "dress" them. Compared with them it is dry and cold. And unless His grace comes down, like the rain and sunshine, we shall use this tool to to little purpose. But its laborious-- and largely negative-- services are indispensable. If they were needed when the garden was still Paradisal, how much more now when the soil has gone sour and the worst weeds seem to thrive on it best? But heaven forbid we should work in the spirit of prigs and Stoics. While we hack and prune we know very well that what we are hacking and pruning is big with a splendour and vitality which our rational will could never itself have supplied. To liberate that splendour, to let it become fully what it is trying to be, to have tall trees instead of scrubby tangles, and sweet apples instead of crabs, is part of our purpose"

48. EROS Dizer isto não é depreciar os amores naturais mas indicar onde se acha a sua verdadeira glória. Não é desprezo pelo jardim dizer-lhe que não poderá tirar sozinho as ervas daninhas nem podar as árvores frutíferas ou colocar uma cerca ao seu redor, ou mesmo cortar a grama. Um jardim é uma coisa boa, mas essa não é a espécie de bondade que ele possui, pois permanecerá um jardim, distinto de uma selva somente se alguém fizer todas essas coisas para ele. Sua verdadeira glória é de um tipo muito diferente. O próprio fato de necessitar cuidados constantes dá testemunho dessa glória. Ele fervilha de vida. Ele resplandece em cores e aromas celestiais e apresenta a cada hora de um dia de verão belezas que o homem jamais poderia ter criado nem mesmo imaginado com seus próprios recursos. Se você quiser ver a diferença entre a contribuição dele e a do jardineiro, coloque o mato mais comum que nele cresce lado a lado com as enxadas, ancinhos, tesouras de podar e pacote de inseticida; você colocou beleza, energia e fecundidade ao lado de coisas mortas, estéreis. Assim também a nossa “decência e bom senso” se mostram cinzas e cadavéricos ao lado da genialidade do amor. E, quando o jardim se encontra em plena glória, as contribuições do jardineiro para essa glória continuarão desprezíveis quando comparadas às da natureza. Sem a vida brotando da terra, sem a chuva, a luz e o calor descendo do céu, ele nada poderia fazer. Depois de ter feito tudo, simplesmente encorajou aqui e desencorajou ali, poderes e belezas de uma fonte diferente. A sua contribuição, porém, embora pequena, é indispensável e laboriosa. Quando Deus plantou um jardim, Ele colocou um homem sobre o mesmo e este debaixo das suas ordens. Quando Ele plantou o jardim da nossa natureza e fez com que amores brotassem e frutificassem nele estabeleceu que “cuidássemos” deles. Comparada com os mesmos ela é seca e fria e a não ser que a graça divina desça, com a chuva e o sol, usaremos em vão este instrumento. Mas os seus serviços laboriosos, e na maioria negativos, são indispensáveis. Se eles foram necessários enquanto o jardim era ainda paradisíaco, quanto mais agora quando o solo se contaminou e as piores espécies de ervas daninhas parecem crescer alegremente nele? Mas, não permita o céu que labutemos com espirito de presunção e estoicismo. Enquanto ceifamos e podamos sabemos muito bem que aquilo em que estamos trabalhando está cheio de um esplendor e vitalidade que nossa vontade racional jamais poderia ter suprido por si mesma. Liberar esse esplendor, fazer com que se torne completamente aquilo que está tentando ser, obter apenas árvores altas em lugar de moitas emaranhadas, e maçãs doces em lugar de azedas, é parte de nosso propósito.

49. EROS Não existe um investimento seguro. Amar é ser vulnerável. Ame qualquer coisa e seu coração irá certamente ser espremido e possivelmente partido. Se quiser ter a certeza de mantê-lo intacto, não deve dá-lo a ninguém, nem mesmo a um animal. Envolva-o cuidadosamente em passatempos e pequenos confortos, evite todos os envolvimentos, feche-o com segurança no esquife ou no caixão do seu egoísmo. Mas nesse esquife - seguro, sombrio, imóvel, sufocante - ele irá mudar. Não será quebrado, mas vai tornar-se inquebrável, impenetrável, irredimível. A alternativa para a tragédia, ou pelo menos para o risco da tragédia é a danação. O único lugar fora do céu onde você pode manter-se perfeitamente seguro contra todos os perigos e perturbações do amor é o inferno.

50. EROS The Lord is Gracious – His Grace is Greater than our Sin He gives us a new chance every time We can always start again