Theme 2014: Experiencing God, Embracing People!

1. Theme 2014: Experiencing God, Embracing People! How To Reconcile A Relationship Matthew 5:9

2. Matthew 5:9... for they will be called sons of God.

3. Are PEACEMAKERS needed in the world today?

4. MAIN POINTS 1. Misconceptions About Peacemaking

5. 2 Misconceptions about conflicts: Peacemaking is.... "Avoidance" a) "Appeasing" b)

6. 2. Damage Caused By Unresolved Conflict

7. Why is unresolved conflicts damaging? Unresolved conflicts HURT in 3 ways!

8. It Blocks My "Fellowship" With God a) 1 John 4:20…. “If anyone says, ‘I love God,’ yet hates his brother, he is a liar. For anyone who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen.” [NIV]

9. b) It Blocks My "Prayer" From Being Answered 1 Peter 3:7…. “Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect . . . so that nothing will hinder your prayers.” [NIV]

10. c) It Blocks My "Happiness" Job 18:4…. “You are only hurting yourself with your anger…” [NIV]

11. 3. How To Be A Peacemaker

12. James 3:18…. “And those who are peacemakers will plant seeds of peace and reap a harvest of goodness.” [NLT]

13. 7 Seeds to being a “Peacemaker”....

14. Make The First Move a) Matthew 5:23-24…. “23 So if you are standing before the altar in the Temple, offering a sacrifice to God, and you suddenly remember that someone has something against you, 24 leave your sacrifice there beside the altar. Go and be reconciled to that person. Then come and offer your sacrifice to God.”[NLT]

15. Reconciliation should take priority even over worship. Note: The only way to resolve a conflict is to face it!

16. The biggest barrier to deal with is… YOUR OWN FEAR! Genesis 3:10…. “He (Adam) answered, ‘I heard you in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid.’ ” [NIV]

17. Fear of being EXPOSED or being VULNERABLE — causes us to do 3 things . . . Defensive Distant Demanding afraid to reveal our real self. withdraw & hide our true feeling. try to control things, have last words.

18. Where do we find the courage to “reconcile”? God’s Spirit! 2 Timothy 1:7…. “For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.”[NLT]

19. Ask God For Wisdom b) James 1:5…. “If you need wisdom – if you want to know what God wants you to do – ask him, and he will gladly tell you. He will not resent your asking.” [NLT]

20. c) Begin With What's My Fault What are the causes of “CONFLICTS”?

21. i) Self-Centeredness James 4:1…. “What causes fights and quarrels among you? They are caused by selfish desires that are continually at war inside you.” [Paraphrase]

22. When I’m at peace inside,what’s outside doesn’t upset me. I can disagree without getting distressed.

23. ii) Pride & Hurt Feelings Proverbs 13:10…. “Pride only leads to arguments.” [NCV]

24. We all have blind spots. Matthew 7:3,5…. “3 Why do you notice the little piece of dust in your friend’s eye, but you don’t notice the big piece of wood in your own eye? . . . 5 First, take the wood out of your own eye. Then you will see clearly to take the dust out of your friend’s eye.”[NCV]

25. Listen To Their Hurt & Perspective d) Hurt people… HURT OTHERS!

26. James 1:19…. “. . . be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry.” [NLT] Always listen before speaking

27. Philippians 2:4-5…. “Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus.” [NIV]

28. Old Chinese proverbs…. First seek to understand before you seek to be understood!

29. Romans 15:2…. “. . . we must bear the ‘burden’ of being considerate of the doubts and fears of others…”[LB]

30. e) Speak The Truth Tactfully Ephesians 4:15…. “Speak the truth in love.” — but never use the truth as a bat to hit or stab people.

31. Truth without love is resisted, but with love it is received. Proverbs 12:18…. “Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.”[NIV]

32. Foolish words hurt. Wise words heal! Ephesians 4:29…. “Do not use harmful words, but only helpful words, the kind that build up and provide what is needed ...”[TEV]

33. Fix The Problem, Not The Blame f) In conflict settlements, learn to attack the issue without attacking each other.

34. Colossians 3:8…. “You must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice,slander, and filthy language from your lips.” [NIV]

35. Anger, rage Malice Slander Don’t try to intimidate with anger (threats). Saying things to wound, hurt, destroy. Insults, belittling, labeling, character assassination.

36. g) Focus On Reconciliation, Not Resolution Reconciliation is re-establishing the relationship. Resolution is resolving every disagreement.

37. The truth is that there are some things you will never agree on. You can have UNITY without uniformity. You can walk hand in hand without seeing eye to eye. You can have reconciliation without resolution of every issue.

38. If you focus on the relationship — often issues become insignificant.

39. As Christians, we should commit to becoming an agent of “reconciliation.”

40. CONCLUSION What do you think is God’s GOAL for us? We be PEACEMAKERS!

41. 2 Corinthians 5:18-20…. “God has restored our relationship with him through Christ, and has given us this ministry of restoring relationships. God was in Christ restoring his relationship with humanity. …

42. He didn’t hold people’s faults against them, and he has given us this message of restored relationships to tell others. We are Christ’s representatives . . . We beg you on behalf of Christ to become reunited with God.”[GW]