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*in 10 out of 100 cases, I like those odds!!

Is your spine smashed, or out of place, well after just 3 weeks* of treatment your spine could be straight, and you would be saying goodbye to back pain for ever. *in 10 out of 100 cases, I like those odds!!. Yes!. Are you sick of doing exercises to cure your back pain? I sure am!!.

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*in 10 out of 100 cases, I like those odds!!

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  1. Is your spine smashed, or out of place, well after just 3 weeks* of treatment your spine could be straight, and you would be saying goodbye to back pain for ever. *in 10 out of 100 cases, I like those odds!!

  2. Yes! • Are you sick of doing exercises to cure your back pain? • I sure am!!

  3. (Yeah, straight to the morgue!!)

  4. Instead, spread a whole lot of toxic chemicals in the form of a sweet smelling cream onto your spine! Sounds pretty damn good to me!!!

  5. Each pack of tablets comes with a bonus mix in anaesthetic! • Your back will be so numb, you’ll think you’ve lost your spine • (May* cause extended numbness in other organs/limbs/brain) • *Will

  6. After testing Simmo’s back relief scientists* have proven that it almost halves the amount of back pain. *they told us they were scientists

  7. Did you like that last chart, here’s another one.

  8. Here’s another more complicated one!

  9. FANCY, THIS ISN’T IS IT A GRAPH THIS IS A PYRAMID GRAPH • Included in this high quality package, are no less* than 400 capsules guaranteed to get rid of back pain, a 3 kilo tub of instant back pain relief rub and you even get a free t-shirt that says “I HAVE BACK PAIN.” How’s that for value!!! • This whole package has a total value of $300.00, but today it’s yours for only $89.95!! What value!!! * Not quite true

  10. Quality Value • Because we believe in customer service, we include a set of fancy graphs and diagrams, to give you confidence in purchasing our product! • (People with epilepsy should not view them) Customer Satisfaction Service

  11. Company Information • All of our special potions are created in profesional looking test tubes, like these. • Because some* of our customers have a small^ recovery period, we are happy to provide you with a wheel chair for an extra fee($189.95). This is asymbol of our great customer dedication. (Why did that Coroner want to shut us down?) • * 89% • ^20 years

  12. Only one in five customers end up like this! That means less pain for you and less court cases for us!!

  13. “Now I bet you want to know about our weaknesses, but a weakness is considered as a bad thing, and you don’t want to know about bad things, do you? I mean if we tell you a whole lot of bad things, your back might hurt more, and then you’d have to buy more of our products (hmmm). Our chart proves this.*” -Tim of Simessy Tech *We think

  14. It took Andrew and Tim of Simessey tech nearly ten years to create this amazing product, and yes, when buying this product you get the satisfaction of knowing that it was made by Tim and Andrew themselves*. Tim and Andrew *or one of their pet monkeys.

  15. We can give you a guarantee that you won’t need one of these signs on your windshield for at least two years after taking Simessy Tech back pain relief.

  16. ...And if Simessy Tech back pain relief doesn’t work then not only will we let you keep the product (we advise you not to), but we will also give you a whole 100%* of the price you paid back. This is one impotant piece of paper.

  17. .....for Simessy Tech’s instant back relief!!!!!

  18. This ad has been brought to you by channel 69, damn straight it suc….

  19. Sorry, but we’re currently expieriencing

  20. created by ANRKIand PYRO And some of the deroes at flinder st.

  21. anrki 2001§

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