Bye Bye Black Sheep

1. Bye Bye Black Sheep • Fear The Man • Battle for the Crown • Jason and the Argonauts • Lend me a Hand • Symplegades Rock • The Likes of Us • Dead Bodies in Trees • I Might Give You the Fleece • Dear God Apollo • A Happy Ending?

2. Mary had a little lamb It’s fleece was white as snow Not the thing you thought we’d sing To open up our show Stick with us and we’ll explain The fit with Ancient Greece All to do with how they viewed The power of the fleece They thought such things were powerful Brought magic every day They wouldn’t care for Mary’s lamb And that is why they’d say Bye bye black sheep We don’t want ewe We like our wool In a different he Three backs ain’t quite enough For us in Greece Give us prosperity And a Golden Fleece

3. So now you see the reason why We’re singing about sheep Concentrate on Ancient Greece Forget about Bo-Peep • Bye bye black sheep • We don’t want ewe • We like our wool • In a different he • Three backs ain’t quite enough • For us in Greece • Give us prosperity • And a Golden Fleece

4. I am a prophet - my prophecy Tells you the future prophetically I know about tomorrow but today I know the trouble That’s coming your way You know you shouldn’t be the king Sitting on thrones is not your thing There will be one to bring you down I know who he is and he’ll take your crown Fear the man with just one shoe If he is related to you No idea what he might do But it will not be great Fear the man with just one shoe He will be the death of you When you see a missing sandal Time to say goodbye

5. Jason your cousin’s coming round His footsteps make a funny sound He helped dear Hera cross a brook One of his sandals got swept off his foot Fear the man with just one shoe If he is related to you No idea what he might do But it will not be great Fear the man with just one shoe He will be the death of you When you see a missing sandal Time to say goodbye repeat

6. Jason went to Iolcus and said, “Pelias – that crown upon your head “Isn’t where it ought to be: “The rightful king’s not you but me “Give me what is mine: don’t make me beg!” Pelias was crafty as can be Said to Jason, “Now then let us see “I will give you what you ask “If you do a simple task!” Had in mind the awful prophecy It’s a battle for the crown For the biggest gig in town And Jason thinks he should be reigning So he’s complaining now Has a claim upon the throne Wants to make the kingdom home But Peliasaint’ abdicating Anticipating a row

7. Jason liked the notion of the deal Had a certain “quid pro quo” appeal Did not know that he’d been conned That the task was way beyond What a man could do – it was unreal It’s a battle for the crown For the biggest gig in town And Jason thinks he should be reigning So he’s complaining now Has a claim upon the throne Wants to make the kingdom home But Peliasaint’ abdicating Anticipating a row

8. Jason said, “I need a ship to help me on my quest “Chances are it will be tough: I only want the best “Argus – you’re the shipbuilder: let’s see what you can do “If you build it quick and strong I’ll name it after you!” Come join the crew and let’s go sailing Island to island; port to port We are the first ship to go cruising We’re Jason and the Argonauts “Find me fifty heroes who are strong and who can row “Find me one to navigate and tell us where to go “No-one has set sail like this along the Black Sea Coast “We’re the first in history – listen to our proud boast!” Come join the crew… Raise the anchor hard a-port and cast off fore and aft Start your rowing in and out but not too slow or fast Come join the crew…

9. I wanted to be a sailor I wanted to go to sea I wanted to join the Argo But look what happens to me Whenever I’m sailing Pass me the bucket Pass me the mop I’m feeling queasy Don’t think I’ll stop ‘Til my feet are on solid ground I’m feeling sick Lend me a hand

10. All of the others kept laughing Whenever we left the shore My face would start going greenish I’ve had that feeling before And it starts in my tummy Pass me the bucket Pass me the mop I’m feeling queasy Don’t think I’ll stop ‘Til my feet are on solid ground I’m feeling sick Lend me a hand Stop the boat from moving please x2 Pass me the bucket Pass me the mop I’m feeling queasy Don’t think I’ll stop ‘Til my feet are on solid ground I’m feeling sick Lend me a hand

11. Sailing along the Black Sea Coast is rather fun Gorgeous blue sea and clear blue skies with lots of sun Pity that there’s a hazard coming up ahead And it could mean that we all end up very dead We have no notion what to do Could be the end of this whole crew Sailing along the Black Sea Coast is not much fun SymplegadesRock; Symplegadesroll Symplegadesswallow your vessel up whole The Clashing Islands will not let a boat go through They smash themselves together – it’s goodbye for you! SymplegadesRock; Symplegadesroll Symplegadesswallow your vessel up whole We hope that Jason finds a way beat the rocks Or we’ll be saying cheerio to him And his Argonauts

12. When you said “I do” to him You said till death you part Ancient Grecian women took This very line to heart When their marriage fell apart They didn’t do divorce Made sure death was happening Quite logical of course When unhappy wives said “please help me!” Here’s the marriage guidance for the Greeks When you’ve had enough of him And can’t take it no more Got rid of his body And cleaned up all the gore Aphrodite will curse you But she won’t make a fuss Just banish you to Lemnos Where you’ll meet the likes of us

13. So when Jason and his crew All landed on the isle Probably weren’t greeted with A cuddle and a smile Seeing fifty handsome brave young men Land on the beach Must have caught them by surprise And must have made them screech Grabbing anything that came to hand Driving every man from off their land When you’ve had enough of him… Don’t make an Ancient Greek wife angry or upset She will respond in ways you very soon will regret When you’ve had enough of him…

14. You really must be kidding Want me to do your bidding And simply give you the fleece? Jason – I’m here to tell ya There is a slight dilemma To solve before its release Are you brave or are you yellow? Here’s the task for you dear fellow Yoke the bulls who breath out fire Then plant the dragon’s teeth Kill the warriors who grow Then I might give you the fleece! This is my girl Medea I think she’s made it clear She really wants to help out To get her on your side Promise she’ll be your bride Don’t let her down – have no doubt: Just make sure that you’re not lying Trust me she’s not worth defying

15. Looks like you might be on top Unless I find a way to stop You finishing the task that I set Maybe I should try and kill ya When we meet tonight for dinner Cheating’s gotta be my best bet Yoke the bulls who breath out fire Then plant the dragon’s teeth Kill the warriors who grow Then I might give you the fleece!

16. There is beautiful sunshine – not a cloud in the sky The birds sing a welcome as we wander by The flowers all wave as they move in the breeze As we gaze up and notice Dead bodies in tree They’ve been hanging for ages and are starting to smell The hides they were wrapped in are not lasting well We won’t be surprised to see maggots and fleas Feeding on rotten flesh from Dead bodies in trees Better watch where you’re treading – we’re not worried by mud But bright scarlet puddles that are made up of blood This open air abattoir doesn’t quite please Our stomachs can’t cope with Dead bodies in trees There are some that are well past their best before date We are sure we will see bits fall off if we wait A shower of putrefied flesh will not please So we’d better move on from Dead bodies in trees

17. There’s a storm coming down And we think we might drown And there’s nowhere to moor ‘Til it’s safe So we fall to our knees And we pray will you please Get this boat to a Happier place Dear God Apollo We’re full of sorrow Won’t see tomorrow If we all die Please come and save us The weather’s heinous Then you’ll be famous And we’ll know why

18. And Apollo agreed When he heard Jason plead Used his power to help Save the day Made an island arise Neath tempestuous skies They could wait ‘til the storm Blew away Dear God Apollo We’re full of sorrow Won’t see tomorrow If we all die Please come and save us The weather’s heinous Then you’ll be famous And we’ll know why Please don’t think that we are just complaining We all knew this trip was not plain sailing – it’s not!

19. So much for being a hero Calls himself the star of the show? We knew a hero had standards Didn’t know that they were so low! Jason broke his promise to marry Made Medea mad in the head She went to see all his children What a shame they ended up dead I hope you didn’t want a happy ending ‘Cause you won’t find one in this show The main character’s dead – his wife killed his children Happy ever after? No! I hope you didn’t want a happy ending ‘Cause you won’t find one with the Greeks We’ll wish you a goodnight and thank you for coming Bet you get nightmares for weeks

20. Made him a little unhappy That’s an understatement I know He found himself at the seaside Looking at the wreck of Argo Wondered if the gods would forgive him Maybe give him another go That’s when the prow fell and killed him Looks like the answer was “no” I hope you didn’t want a happy ending ‘Cause you won’t find one in this show The main character’s dead – his wife killed his children Happy ever after? No! I hope you didn’t want a happy ending ‘Cause you won’t find one with the Greeks We’ll wish you a goodnight and thank you for coming Bet you get nightmares for weeks