The Relationship Secrets of Successful Change

1. The Relationship Secrets of Successful Change Laurie W. Ford, Ph.D. www.laurieford.com

2. Ideas for Today • Relationship: What it is (and is not) • The Relationship Secret • What is “Change”? • What is “Successful Change”? • What we want more of: • Trust • Accountability • Teamwork

3. Your “Success Network”:

4. Relationship: Your Key to Success

5. “Relationship”

6. Internal or External?

7. Let’s call it “Conversations”

8. The Relationship Secret • Why is “relationship” such a mystery? • Because… • Conversations disappear.

9. The Two Requirements of Change • FROM • TO That’s it. Where are you now? Where do you want to be?

10. Successful Change = • FROM 2. TO On Time, Under Budget, with People Engaged.

11. Ideas so far… • Relationship:Focus on Conversations. • The Relationship Secret: Conversations Disappear. • What is “Change”? A transition From ___ To ___. • What is “Successful Change”? • From ___ To ___ On Time, Under Budget, People Engaged. • How will we get what we want more of? • Trust • Accountability • Teamwork Effective Conversations

12. Unproductive Conversations • COMPLAINTS • BLAMING • GOSSIP

13. What to Talk About: The “Accomplishment Ingredients” To help someone accomplish something, even a small task, include “Accomplishment ingredients”: • What are we trying to accomplish? • When do we want to accomplish it? • Whyis this accomplishment important? • If you leave one ingredient out, you lose the opportunity for accomplishment.

14. What to Talk About:The “Resource Ingredients” To support people’s engagement, add “Resource ingredients” to your conversation: • Who else is involved? • Where will the resources come from? And Where will the results go? • How will it get done? • If you leave one ingredient out, there is confusion or hesitancy about resources and participation.

15. At Your Table: Your Quick Profile Which ingredients are missing in YOUR work? • What we want to accomplish • When we want to make it happen • Why it matters • Who else is involved • Where the resources will come from, and where the results will go • How we can make it happen

16. Four Productive Conversations • Initiative - Get something started Announce a new customer service policy and the reasons for its value • Understanding – Engage other people Have a Q&A session to discuss the new policy and how it fits with people’s current jobs • Performance – Make agreements Clarify who will do each part of the policy, and when • Closure – Follow up for accomplishment Report results, thank people, put in corrections

17. Four Productive Conversations Initiative Conversations Introduce a new goal, propose an idea, or launch a change in a positive way to attract people to follow your leadership What – When – Why

18. Four Productive Conversations Understanding Conversations Have people create their own role in the new initiative by asking useful questions and contributing good ideas Who – Where – How

19. Four Productive Conversations Performance Conversations Support people in getting into action by making requests, making promises, and establishing agreements for performance Agreements: What – When - Why

20. Four Productive Conversations Closure Conversations Help people put the past behind them and move forward with credibility, a positive attitude, and a sense of accomplishment 4 A’s: Acknowledge, Appreciate, Apologize, Amend

21. All Four Conversations are Important Initiative conversations – Give people enthusiasm, interest, and purpose. Attention Understanding conversations – Help people engage, step up to participation. Trust & Teamwork Performance conversations – Support getting accurate, complete, and on time results. Performance Closure conversations – Avoid a buildup of resentment, cynicism, or mistrust. Trust & Accountability

22. At Your Table: Your Quick Profile Which conversations are missing in YOUR work? • Initiative - Get something started (Attention, Interest, Enthusiasm) • Understanding – Engage other people (Trust & Teamwork) • Performance – Make agreements (Performance) • Closure – Follow up for accomplishment (Trust & Accountability)

23. The Secret of Successful Change Start with Closure Conversations: • Acknowledge the facts: Say what’s so • Address successes, problems, complaints, and conditions • Appreciate the people • Recognize accomplishment & contribution • Apologize for mistakes & misunderstandings • Take responsibility, even if you didn’t “do it” • Amend Broken Agreements • Recognize, Report, Repair, Recommit

24. The Cycle of Successful Change • CLOSURE: Recognition & return to purpose • Acknowledge facts, Appreciate people, Apologize for mistakes, and Amend broken agreements. • INITIATIVE: Your proposal of vision and value • Draft, develop ,and revise your plan • UNDERSTANDING: Planning & engagement • Clarify responsibilities for tasks and results • PERFORMANCE: Call for actions & results • Make Requests. Make Promises. Make Agreements.

25. Obstacles: “Resistance” Resistance conversations come in three flavors: • Complacency – “Why bother?” • Resignation – “It won’t work.” • Cynicism – “Nothing ever works.”

26. The Relationship Secrets of Successful Change Related Topics: • Resistance to Change • Use CLOSURE conversations (complete the past) • Use INITIATIVE conversations (re-state desired future) • Use UNDERSTANDING conversations (Engage: Who, Where, How) • Use PERFORMANCE conversations (establish Agreements for results) • Leadership

27. “Resistance” “Resistance” is a product of: • Missing, Inappropriate, and Incomplete conversations over time … which results in complacency, resignation, and/or cynicism ... and creates distrust, and a loss of credibility.

28. “Resistance” Is Not an Obstacle “Resistance” is a form of conversation. • Resistance conversations are just ways in which some people participate in organization change. • Listen carefully to what is being said. • Use the information as a valuable source of feedback. See “Decoding Resistance to Change” in Harvard Business Review, March 2009, on www.laurieford.com

29. Put “Resistance” to Work • Collect ideas for improving the Change Plan • Identify where Closure-Action is needed: • What facts need to be acknowledged? • What people need to be appreciated? • What mistakes or misunderstandings deserve an apology? • What broken agreements should be amended? • Clarify objectives and strategies, timelines and task assignments.

30. Leadership Conversations Five Practices of Exemplary Leadership, Kouzes & Posner • Model the way, Credibility • Initiative and Closure Conversations • Inspire a shared vision • Initiative and Understanding Conversations • Challenge the process, Open to ideas • Understanding Conversations • Enable others to act, Cooperation & Trust • Performance and Closure Conversations • Encourage the heart, Appreciate • Closure Conversations

31. Conversations in Work and Life It’s not only about organization change. Your conversations are a vital ingredient in the quality of your life. • Reach your goals and help others reach theirs • Establish and maintain good relationships • Make things happen, Get things done

32. Limitations to a Successful Workplace • Lateness • Poor work quality • Difficult people • Lack of teamwork • Poor planning and workload overwhelm • Insufficient resources and support • Lack of accountability

33. Initiative: Propose an Accomplishment • What: Propose an idea for an attractive and worthwhile future • Stay positive, focus on the future we want, not the one we want to avoid • When: Propose a timeline • Why: Show people the value of making it happen

34. Tips: Initiative Conversations Get all necessary authorities aligned on the goal and talking about resources Plan your Initiative Conversation to get people’s attention and jumpstart new thinking Don’t over-initiate: see things through Most common mistake: Assuming people remember what they are working toward.

35. Understanding Conversations • Say Whatyou want, When, and Why • Engage people in creating the plan. Ask: • Who should be involved? Who are our customers? Suppliers? • Where are the people and resources we need? • How can we be successful? How does this change my job? • Then LISTEN…

36. Tips: Understanding Conversations • Use a Q&A format: you want input! - What needs to be done to accomplish this? - What is a good schedule for us to do it? - Are there any good measures of success? • Repeat as needed: What we want, When we want it, and Why it matters • Stand by your initiative, but be willing to collaborate for the goal and the plan Bonus: New knowledge, new vocabulary, new solutions.

37. What is “Performance”? • Taking an action • Producing a result • Delivering a service or communication • NOTE: Understanding does not cause performance.

38. The Foundation of Performance • Whataction or result do you want? • By Whendo you want it? • Whydoes it matter? • Request • + Promise • = Agreement

39. The Likelihood of Taking Action • 10% • 25% • 40% • 50% • 65%

40. Make Requests Ask! • Will you do What is wanted? • Be specific about the results • Will you do it When it is needed? • Give and get deadlines • Do you understand Why is it important? • People need a context Yes, you have to ask.

41. Performance Conversations: It’s About Agreements • Confirm the Agreement • Your expectations are not their promises • Manage the Agreement • Help people remember • Make promises public

42. Closure Conversations • Create accomplishment. -- We finished the project. • Create acknowledgment. • Thank you for the work you did on ….” • Create completion. • What worked? What didn’t? • Close the book on past goals, requests, promises.

43. The Likelihood of Taking Action • 10% • 25% • 40% • 50% • 65% If you have a specific “accountability-appointment” with the person you made the promise to • 95%

44. Using the Four Conversations Everyday communication that gets results: • Initiative - Launch • Understanding - Engage • Performance – Ask + Promise = Agreements • Closure – Complete the accomplishment

45. Conversations in Work and Life Blog: www.usingthefourconversations.com Your conversations are a key ingredient in the quality of your life. • Make things happen, Get things done • Establish and maintain good relationships • Reach your goals and help others reach theirs

46. 8 Conversational Bad Habits • Not saying why something matters • Not being specific about what we want • Forgetting to say “by when” we want it • Waiting for others (“leaders”) to communicate • Assuming everyone understands things the same way (quality, performance, relationship, etc.) • Tolerating complaints instead of using them • Assuming people are good at managing their time • Not helping others be “complete” when it’s over

47. Communicating for Change:Draft Your Plan (in conversation, of course) SpecifyWhat, When, Why, How: • What is the change? Be specific: you can’t just say “improve” or “increase” – use measures. What changes? From what, To what? How will you know when you’re done? • When should it happen? Establish your best estimate for the timeline and the end date when the change will be complete. • Why should it happen? Draft the purpose & goals. What will it accomplish? How will it advance the mission? • How should it happen? Four components: • Change Process: Identify steps or stages + timeline for each. • Anticipated challenges: Anticipate problems and solutions. • HR: Identify needs for training, hiring, reviews, etc. • Financial: Budgets, resources, personnel, etc.

48. Communicating for Change:Draft Your Change “Performance Network” SpecifyWho, Where Who are your: • Change Authorities – people who can help you finalize your Change Plan (decision makers relevant to your change) • Change Performers – people who will produce the results that will make the change happen, e.g., Managers, Engineers, Trainers • Change Users-Customers – people who will benefit most from the change • Change Resources – people who have ideas & resources for the change to work in your organization, industry, or environment Where are these people and groups located? Sketch out the "geography" of the change.

49. Communicating for Change Use your Change Plan and Change Performance Network to have conversations for causing and completing the change you want. • Initiative and Understanding conversations • Revise & improve the Change Plan and Change Performance Network • Understanding and Performance conversations • Clarify responsibilities, and displays for tracking results • Make requests, promises, agreements. • All four conversations • Hold regular Status Update Meetings to track progress, refresh value, address concerns, update agreements, and recognize results. • Turn resistance into ideas for improving the Change Plan and Network • Closure conversations - create accomplishment & recognition

50. Summary 1. Some conversations are not productive 2. Four conversations are productive: • Initiative, Understanding, Performance, Closure 3. Conversations can have six ingredients: • What-When-Why and Who-Where-How 4. Most problems, in work and in the rest of life, can be resolved with conversation 5. “Resistance” is everywhere. It’s your job to put it to work for your goals.