Engaging Fathers in the Behavioral Health Recovery Process for Youth

1. Engaging Fathers in the Behavioral Health Recovery Process for Youth A Practical Perspective WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

2. Washington Dads • Mission: To Educate and empower Dad, Families and Communities to Improve Behavioral Health for Children, Youth and their Families. • Vision: Washington Dads is the Premier Organization Supporting Male Care Givers for Behavioral Health WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

3. Objectives • Explore the perspective and challenges of men who are raising behaviorally challenging children • Discover helpful practices to engage men in positive collaboration in the recovery process for children and their families. WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

4. True or False? • Behavioral health challenges create stress among family members • Men and women respond differently to stress • Different responses justify different solutions WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

5. Situations creating stress • Parenting practices aren’t working • Frequent calls from school staff • Balancing work/home responsibilities • Limited insurance benefits • Costly property repairs • Family safety concerns • Transition to adulthood • Criminal activity WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

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8. Why stress out? • Fathers feel responsible • Dads are role models • Built to fix the problem and move on WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

9. Male Response to Stress • Functional magnetic resonance imaging of men and women under stress showed neuroscientists how their brains differed in response to stressful situations. In men, increased blood flow to the left orbit frontal cortex suggested activation of the "fight or flight" response. In women, stress activated the limbic system, which is associated with emotional responses. • ScienceDaily.com WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

10. The Fight Response • Numerous studies have shown that there is no real difference in the way men and women experience anger. All people feel anger, and most feel angry about the same things. However, men and women (and boys and girls) express their anger in different ways. Men tend to be more physically aggressive, to engage in passive-aggressive behavior more often, and to be more impulsive in expressing anger. • FamilyEducation.com WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

11. Poor Advice Abounds • When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear • Mark Twain WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

12. Men are from Mars • Men have their own caves on which the sign states "Please do not disturb." Men like to retreat into their own world where they feel they are in control. Women also have caves but the sign on their caves is "I need to talk". • Learning From Dr. John Gray's Seminar on Relationship Enrichment, Men are From Mars Women are From Venus. WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

13. Fathers experience isolation • People have difficulty interacting with those they don’t understand • Repeated exposure to crisis impacts ability to participate • Social isolation has a significant impact upon mental and physical health, and should be classed among smoking and obesity as a major risk factor to health • WorldHealth.net Anti-aging news WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

14. Do fathers experience stigma? • “Being the parent of a bipolar child has not made me popular. My child has been passed over for parties and had his own invitations declined. Other parents who only know my child by the stories they hear from their own kids are quick to label him as a bad seed. And if he’s a bad seed, surely he must come from bad parents.” • website WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

15. Do fathers experience stigma? • “People fear what they don’t understand. Many people don’t understand mental illness. Some of them are closer than you think—friends and family members you never expected to do or say hurtful things” • website WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

16. Do fathers experience stigma? • Stigmatization of people with mental disorders is manifested by bias, distrust, stereotyping, fear, embarrassment, anger, and/or avoidance. – U.S. Surgeon General WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

17. Downward Spiral Without Intervention WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

18. Intervention Opportunities Education + Encouragement = Empowerment WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

19. Male Therapists An ‘endangered minority’ • Men earn only 20% of all master’s degrees in psychology – down from 50% in 1970 • “Some men, I think, prefer to talk about that – the joy of being a father, the stress, how it’s impacting them – with a therapist who’s had the same experience” – psychologist at University of Texas • Seattle Times article 2011 WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

20. Recovery as it applies to fathers • Fathers are recovering from the condition of feeling isolated & powerless to help a child or youth with emerging mental health needs • Peer support is a promising part of the recovery revolution WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

21. Four elements of one recovery model • Hope • The driving force to keep going • Empowerment • A sense of some ability to influence my future • Self Responsibility • Personal action steps carry great weight • Meaningful Roles • Competency in assisting recovery WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

22. Support groups – are they effective? • Men need to trust the group before letting down the guard • Can these people understand me? • Takes time to build rapport • Environment is important • Non-judgmental • Devoid of distractions WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

23. A promising recovery process • Transformational Dads Weekend • Engagement – listen to shared experiences • Education – provide resources and practical instruction • Empowerment– support and encourage WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

24. Setting the stage – First evening • Expectations • None • Not sure what to expect • Leading questions • How do you wish things were different at home? • What makes you feel powerless? • What would you change about mental health system? WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

25. Engage • Place to vent feelings • Powerlessness • Fatigue • Crushed Dreams • Place to discuss challenges • Limited resources to help kids • Education plans not working • Home environment is not functional WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

26. First Impressions • “I came expecting nothing…” • "I started losing hope - felt beat down. You mean I'm not alone?” WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

27. Education – New Enlightening Information • Individualized Education Programs • Maintaining Peace At Home • Collaborative Problem Solving • Behavioral Health Resources • Building a Community Support System • Transitioning Youth to Adulthood WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

28. Relaxation & Realization • Downtime provides an opportunity to connect with others • Perceive what we have in common • Understand that we do not struggle alone • “You know what I'm going through” • “I have had a chance to recharge myself, discuss other suggestions and ideas, talk about what is or isn’t working in other families.” WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

29. Empowerment • “I appreciate the opportunity to spend the weekend with these special Dads.” • “I have a more positive outlook on our son’s issues. I have never given up hope for improvement, but my hope level has been raised immensely.” • Recovery System Element # 1 Hope • The driving force to keep going WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

30. Transformation • “I feel like a huge brick just got pulled of my shoulder.” • "I came expecting nothing. I came away with everything.“ • Recovery System Element # 2 - Empowerment • A sense of some ability to influence my future WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

31. The Buddy system • Meet a new friend • Make a personal connection • Maintain occasional contact WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

32. Buddy System Info Exchange • First Name – ___________________________________________________________ • City of Residence – ______________________________________________________ • Current County of Residence for Youth.This location is important if it is different from the caregiver’s and corresponds to a service region within the state. • _______________________________________________________________________ • Best times and days to reach by phone. List the times and days that someone will be most likely to be able to reach you by phone. • _______________________________________________________________________ • Most available phone number. This should be the number you are most reachable at the times specified above. • _______________________________________________________________________ • Actively utilized email address. List an email address that is active and that you check regularly. • _______________________________________________________________________ • Primary language spoken at home - __________________________________________ WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

33. Buddy System Info Exchange • I know for sure that I could use help with: • Locating mental, substance abuse or behavioral health services in my area • Life skill training for youth (job, independent living, etc.) • Relationship with school district • Behavioral concerns at school • Developing an Individualize Education Plan (IEP) • Truancy • Understanding state law (education, disabilities, criminal, etc.) • Managing conflict in the home • Working with law enforcement • Keeping a dependent from running • Healthy socializing skills for youth • Juvenile justice issues • Reducing stress • Other - ____________________________ • Unlisted concerns • Not sure what I need help with WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

34. The Buddy Wall • Choose someone to stay in touch with • Similar challenges • Geographically close WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

35. Recent Weekend Data WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

36. Enlistment • “I want to pay it forward” • Greater dads participation • Families, IEP Meetings, Conferences, Trainings, Leadership, Advocacy • Recovery System Element # 3 - Self Responsibility • Personal action steps carry great weight WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

37. Roles for Dads in Systems of Care Evaluators & Research Advocates & Policy Makers Educators & Consultants Service Providers Partners in the Treatment Process Targets for Change Providing Context • Recovery System Element # 4 - Meaningful Roles • Competency in assisting recovery WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

38. Recovery Model Recap • Hope • The driving force to keep going • Empowerment • A sense of some ability to influence my future • Self Responsibility • Personal action steps carry great weight • Meaningful Roles • Competency in assisting recovery WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

39. Washington dads Explore what otherdads have done EMPOWER EDUCATE & ENGAGE WASHINGTON DADS - 2012

40. Contact Information • Washington Dads • www.wadads.org • 877-847-3050 • P. O. Box 14336, Mill Creek • Washington 98082-2336 • Robert Haffner WASHINGTON DADS - 2012