Exploring feelings

1. Exploring feelings By

2. A few of my favourite things • My Dog • My Computer • Books • Trampoline

3. My strengths and talents • Reading • Relating to animals • Piano • Writing • Most academics • Taekwondo • Drawing • Swimming

4. Writing I have written 5 books, each with a variety of topics. There is the “paladin” trilogy written from 3 different points of view from the characters. There is cubs of the wood, set in the 1950’s, and a book about dragons which I haven't thought of a name for yet. My English teacher, , says I could get some of these published. Writing makes you feel like a god because you are creating a different world in your own style, it is extremely enjoyable.

5. Animals I know lots of different animals and I really like looking after them. I have read hundreds of books and I can name any mammal, bird, reptile, amphibian or fish. I know plenty of interesting facts, like about the peregrine falcon one of the fastest birds in the world, which can reach 300 miles an hour.

6. What makes me happy • World of Warcraft • Fido (that’s my dogs name) • Reading a new book, something I don’t get to do very often. I keep running out. • Listening to music • Doctor Who • Twister ice cream • Pink lemonade

7. How we know we are happy • Face: I don’t really smile but many other people do. • Feeling inside: like a plane with a pilot who slept through his lessons (exciting and whooshy). • Energy levels: rocketing. • Voice: high pitched and lilted. • Body movements: jumping around like a demented frog

8. How much happiness / 10 • A day off school 10/10 • Getting an A for a school assignment: 8/10 • Being invited to a friend’s party: 4/10 • Finding and being allowed to keep £20: 9/10 • Someone telling you they love you: 3/10

9. Ecstatic Thrilled Delighted Joyful Happy Merry Cheerful Loving Enthusiastic Pleased Proud Hopeful Satisfied Some happy words

10. Tranquil Cool Peaceful Secure Relaxed Serene Quiet Safe Calm Soft Resting Comfortable Easy Content Familiar Relaxed words

11. Why is it good to relax? Relaxation: • promotes general good health • improves circulation • causes deeper sleep • sharpens concentration • decreases stress and mental tension • helps memory • develops imagination and creativity • boosts self-confidence

12. How we respond to being relaxed • Posture: goes all floppy • Breathing: smooth and slow • You might yawn • Heart: slower • Speech: soft and slow • Movement: ‘ent much • Thinking: better, more coherent

13. Relaxing for me • World of Warcraft • Books • Drawing • Swimming

14. Relaxing before bedtime Having a relaxation routine before bedtime can help a lot so you get a good night’s sleep. Getting a good night’s sleep is important. • Switch off your Warcraft or other computer game about an hour before bedtime (so about 8.30). • Watch TV, listen to an audio or read for a while. • Have a hot bath. Maybe put lavender bath liquid in. • Go downstairs and drink a hot drink of milk, cocoa or horlicks. • Rub some lavender gel on your wrist or put a lavender sachet under your pillow. • Get comfortable. Cuddle a freddy teddy.

15. If you can’t get to sleep…try.. • Pretend it is time for getting up; tell yourself “I’ll just have a few more minutes in bed”. You never know you might kid yourself! • Use the relaxation exercise to tense and then relax every part of your body. • Find a nice poem to learn like I must go down to the sea by John Masefield. Then when you can’t sleep try reciting it in your mind, not aloud. • Yoga sleep trick: visualise a big deep blue triangle. You go up one side taking in a deep breath, then down the other side holding the breath, than across the bottom letting the breath go. Repeat.

16. Relaxing cue card

17. Losing my temper 10/10 Going to school in the morning 10/10 Not being able to breathe 9/10 Being told off by a teacher 9/10 Seeing a mega spider 9/10 Making choices 9/10 Hearing felt tips on paper 8/10 Being in a crowd 8/10 Thunderstorms 7/10 Crying 7/10 Parents arguing 5/10 Vomiting 5/10 My dreams 4/10 Verbal or physical abuse 3/10 Taking an exam 3/10 Being teased at school 2/10 Doing homework 2/10 Going to hospital 2/10 Texture of cookies 1/10 No one to hang around with 1/10 Being alone 0/10 How anxious /10

18. The morning problem...school days • I often remember my nightmares in the morning a lot worse than they actually were • I always assume how bad school is going to be before I can rationalise it • I hardly ever get any sleep and it takes the strength of a tank to get up and ready • I find it difficult to get organised

19. How we respond to being anxious • Heart: thumps a lot • Breathing: feel like you can’t get your breath, short sharp breaths • Muscles: tense, flooded by adrenalin, getting us ready for fight or flight. • Face: wrinkly forehead. • Speech: ______ says she babbles on about irrelevant things. Steph says she finds it hard to explain what she means. • Thinking: in most people thinking is too impulsive and afterwards what you said or did seems silly or horrible.

20. How Charlotte knows she is feeling anxious: early warning signs • Feeling angry • Tingly tummy • Dry mouth • Feeling jumpy • Wide eyes • Wobbly knees

21. Inappropriate tools These are ways of handling situations that make the problem worse. For example: Throwing something Calling people names Hurting people This might feel good for an instant but then it feels bad, worse than before. Avoid this sort of reaction like the plague! You horrible little ********

22. Inappropriate tools Some people hurt themselves if they are feeling very anxious. Sometimes I attempt to pull my skin off, though I have a very high pain threshold and I cant feel it that much. Stephanie thinks I do this because it distracts me. The trouble is it’s not very good for my skin (she is making me type this because I really couldn’t care less in truth). Steph says I will care about my skin when I am a bit older.

23. When Charlotte is anxious she has found it helps to • Make a written list and think logically through the possible reasons. This really helps to stop yourself from panicking! Make sure you always have a notebook and pen. • Change the scared feeling into anger by complaining about the situation under her breath. Feeling angry feels more in control than feeling scared.

24. Lyra in His Dark Materials coped in an anxious situation by Yelling at other people crossly Getting very upset, at least crying allowed her to express the intense bad feelings Sometimes she bit her lip and made it bleed Got on with stuff that had to be done We use an ordinary toolkit to fix things. We can use an “emotional toolkit” to fix feelings. An emotional toolkit: other people

25. An emotional toolkit: other people Mrs _____ feels anxious when she has to sing a song on her own. • She copes by breathing deeply and slowly and making sure her body is relaxed, especially her jaw not being clenched. • She also thinks that there are worse things than having to sing a song. There are worse things than this

26. _______’s favourite emotional tools seem to be • Thinking tools: when I’m anxious I write a written list of all the possibilities of why I’m anxious and all the possible solutions. This is a great tool to use. • Physical tools: distracting herself by pinching her skin. This is not a wonderful tool.

27. An emotional toolbox thinking tools relaxation tools physical tools social tools other tools

28. Thinking Tools • Make a list of possible problems and solutions. • Say to myself, “I will be ok” which is positive thinking and even though it may sound silly to me it can really work. • Distract myself with thinking about World of Warcraft. • If it is acceptable, I could read to de-stress myself. NB Steph says it is not acceptable to read in lessons at times when teachers expect me to listen and work (there may be times when they let me read).

29. Social Tools ? There is nothing so bad or so little that we cannot talk to someone about it. ? Mrs _____ Mrs _______ People who care for you will be pleased if you talk to them about things that are worrying you. parents Fido my woof Talking to someone if you have a problem is a good idea: They may have good advice for you and just telling someone makes the problem smaller.

30. Relaxation Tools This is something that ______ is self-conscious about. Come on ________! ….have a go….these exercises can really help your general well-being. We tried a few but there are loads more. The most important is a simple breathing exercise. • First let all the stale air out through your mouth. • Then take a big slow breath in through your nose, notice your chest and shoulders go up. • Hold for the count of one, two, three. • Slowly whoosh the air out of your mouth. • Repeat about three times. You should feel a lot better. If you don’t do another three.

31. Physical Tools • If there's space practice taekwondo patterns • Take Fido for a walk • Go swimming • Trampolining

32. Other tools One of the best tools to use is humour. I could try to think of something funny. Even if I don’t respond straight away, it won’t be long before I start to smile. Laughter is infectious too. One of the best things in the world is a good laugh shared with other people.

33. Sample joke A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. I don’t know? A. To get the chinese newspaper….Do you get it? B. No • No, neither do I. I get the Sunday Times. Ha ha!!