The Changing Family

1. The Changing Family

2. Premarital Sex and Marriage • “Romantic love” had triumphed over economic considerations in the working class by 1850 • Economic considerations remained important to the middle class • A popular French author stated that “marriage is in general a means of increasing one’s credit and one’s fortune and of insuring one’s success in the world • This led Frenchmen to marry late after establishing economically and to marry women younger than them • Both premarital sex and illegitimacy increased • After 1850, illegitimacy decreased, indicating the growing morality and stability of the working class

3. Prostitution Through out Paris, 155,000 women were prostitutes between 1871 and 1903. Men of all classes visited prostitutes, but middle class and upper class supplied the most cash. Men often purchased sex and even affection from poor girls before and after marriage. Poor young women would turn to prostitution to make money, but not as a living. Brutal sexist behavior was a part of life. An autobiography, My Secret Life by an English sexual adventurer proposes about his sexual life.

4. Kinship Ties • Marriage and family ties were often very strong. • Most newlyweds tried to live by their parents. • Were able to turn to family for help when they needed help with any problems. • Unexpected deaths left widows and orphans in need of money for support. • A poor couple would have a family member come to help out around the house such as cooking and taking care of kids. • Members of a large family group would normally live in the same neighborhood and close by. • Kinship networks were an important source of mutual support and welfare.

5. Gender Roles and Family Life • Women often struggled for rights during the 19th century • Law placed women in an inferior position and few legal rights were given • Campaigns were often made in order to receive equal legal rights, equal education, and access to professions • Some victories were made, however, women were still kept out of certain universities and professions • Women influenced and controlled household routines • Spending money and domestic decisions were usually determined by women • Running the household was complicated and mothers had to sacrifice welfare and comfort of their husbands • Women worked as fulltime mothers and homemakers , not wage earners • Emotional bonds were made • Emotional bonds were developed by mothers and child • Homes increased emotional importance and symbolized shelter from harsh conditions

6. Child Rearing • Mothers began to show more and more love and concern towards their infants • Early emotional bonding began to spread across the middle class by the 18th century • Instead of hiring wet nurses, they would breast-feed their baby themselves • There were fewer illegitimate children abandoned as foundlings after 1850 • Swaddling disappeared • There was greater concern for older children • This sometimes went too far, and children wanted greater independence • They were greatly concerned about the sexual behavior of there children

7. Child Rearing Cont. • There was a big division of labor • The mother would stay at home and cook meals, mind the children, and clean • The father would go out and work to earn his wages which was brought back to the family • Children often preferred their mother over their father • The emotional connection between the mother and child was much stronger than between father and child • The father worked a lot and the child didn’t see their father much • Sigmund Freud said it was also because the child was forced to repress their feeling when they were around their fathers • Also because the child and father would compete for the mothers love, and all this caused tension between them.