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Discussing Safer Sex

Discussing Safer Sex. Comprehensive Adolescent Pregnancy Prevention C.A.P.P. Objective. Today we will discuss essential information on how to speak to your adolescents about reproductive health. This workshop will be divided into three critical parts: Part I: Introductions & Statistics

jeremy-brown
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Discussing Safer Sex

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  1. Discussing Safer Sex Comprehensive Adolescent Pregnancy Prevention C.A.P.P. ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  2. Objective Today we will discuss essential informationon how to speak to your adolescents about reproductive health. ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  3. This workshop will be divided into three critical parts: • Part I: Introductions & Statistics • Part II: What You Need to Know • Part III: Healthy Discussion & Skill Building Practicum ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  4. Part I:Introductions & Statistics • We will begin by conducting brief introductions • Name • Age of child/children ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  5. ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  6. Pop Quiz *Of these students, 29% did not use a condom during their last sexual encounter. Only 8% used other forms of birth control (pill/shot). What percentage of high school students have had sex? • A:11% • B:89% • C:15% • D:39% ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG *National Center for Chronic Disease Prevention & Health Promotion

  7. Pop Quiz What percentage of students have had their first sexual experience before their 13th birthday? • A: 1% • B: 3% • C: 5% • D: 8% ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  8. Pop Quiz What percentage of high school students report having had 4 or more sexual partners? • A:30% • B:15% • C: 10% • D: Less than 5 % ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  9. GUESS What percentage of high school students reported using drugs or alcohol before their last sexual act? 19% * 3% used a needle to inject illegal drugs ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  10. More Facts • Today we live in a hyper-sexualized culture. Sex is virtually everywhere. • Each year about one million teenage girls become pregnant in US • 19,000,000 new STI cases are reported in the U.S. each year & half are among people under 25. ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  11. More Facts • According to the CDC, 16 is the average age when most people will have their first sexual encounter. • Sex education is a parent’s responsibility. • Talking about sex with adolescents is never easy. Parents usually do it when its too late. ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  12. Parents Children • 93% think their own child has not gone any further than “making out” • >50% reported that they had not discussed 14 of the 24 sex-related topics with their sexually active teen children • 50% had not discussed condom use or birth control with their sons • 25% said that oral sex or going “all the way” is part of a tween (kids 11 – 14 years old) romance • 42% girls had not discussed about birth control • 40% had not talked about refusal skills • 70% boys had not discussed about condoms and birth control ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  13. PART II:What you need to know ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  14. What is HIV? HUMANIMMUNODEFICIENCYVIRUS H: I: V: ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  15. What is AIDS? ACQUIRED IMMUNE DEFICIENCY SYNDROME A: I: D: S: ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  16. Immune System and its components The four bodily fluids that transmit HIV • Blood • Semen • Breast Milk • Vaginal Secretions ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  17. The three transmission routes of HIV • Unprotected sex • Oral • Anal • Vaginal • Mother to Child • Breastfeeding • Perinatal Transmission • Sharing Infected Needles ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  18. Common Sexually Transmitted Diseases • Chlamydia • Gonorrhea • Trichomoniasis • Syphilis • Herpes Simplex Virus 1 & 2 • Human Papillomavirus (HPV) • Hepatitis B & C • HIV • *Pubic Lice • *Bacterial Vaginosis ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  19. What kids need to know by 9 years old MALE/FEMALE SEX ORGANS/FUNCTION • How boys/girls grow and change • The new feelings that may come with these changes Periods/Nocturnal Emissions • What they are • When they might happen and what to do • Sex and pregnancy • What sex is • How babies are made ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  20. What older kids & teens need to know: Birth control • Different Types • Over the counter and prescribed • The Methods • Condoms (Male & Female) • Birth Control Pill • Birth Control Patch • Birth Control Ring • Intrauterine Device (IUD) • Depo-Provera Shot • Implanon ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  21. WHAT IF I DON’T KNOW THE ANSWER TO SOME QUESTIONS? ____________________________ NEVER WORRY ABOUT NOT HAVING ALL THE ANSWERS “My daughter and I went to the library for a book about growing up. We read a chapter every night that week. Both of us enjoyed this special time together.” The library, educational video’s, approved government websites, workshops & family planning clinics are all great sources to facilitate learning ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  22. Part III: Healthy Discussion & Skill Building Practicum ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  23. 4 Steps to Discussing Safer Sex • Start now • Build Trust • Emphasize values • Boost self esteem ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  24. Start Now! What are the benefits to starting a discussion about safer sex “now” rather than “later” ? ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  25. Why Now? • Because it helps children develop responsible behavior and healthy attitudes toward sex. Teens who have discussed sex with their parents are more likely to wait longer to begin having sex and to use contraception. • You can provide accurate information (so you need to know about it). Besides, you can reflect the personal and moral values and principles you want your children to follow. ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  26. Eagerness & Curiosity Pre-pubescent children are more openly curious & eager to learn! Explain how things work! • Better Prepared Discussing sex organs and the body before a child begins to experience the physical changes of puberty will make the transition a lot less traumatic. ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  27. Do not underestimate the things children hear on the playground or process from an adult conversation. By starting the discussion now, you can provide your child with correct knowledge as oppose to them receiving inaccurate information from friends or the media. • Less Tainted ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  28. Finding the right moment Instead of saying “it’s time to talk about… you know,” let the topic arise naturally. Be aware in those everyday moments and find the best opportunity to talk. ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  29. Rule of Thumb *If you discuss sex or sex organ function with your child and they appear to be shy or embarrassed, then you’ve waited too late to initiate the discussion. ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  30. Build Trust How? "Even when I’m busy, I make time to talk with my son. I listen to whatever he has to say. I’m careful not to make fun of the questions he asks. I want him to know he can come to me with anything he’s wondering about." ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  31. Listento your children & answer their questions honestly. They need to know that you are taking their questions and comments seriously. ___________________________________________________ Make time to talk: Sometimes kids ask questions when we don’t have time to listen & talk. If this happens, be sure to make time to talk about it later. Be a good listener and consider your kids point of view. ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  32. Respect your child’s feelings Children’s feelings can get hurt easily. Losing teeth, voice changes & new body hair can be very traumatic for a child. Making fun of a child’s bodily changes is the easiest way to make them self conscious and lose trust MAINTAIN CONFIDENTIALITY ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  33. Be Honest • Keep your sense of humor. If you are uncomfortable, say so. But explain that it is important to keep talking. • Also use words that are understandable and comfortable according to your children’s knowledge. • Children have more trust in a parent that is open and honest as oppose to a parent that may act as if they have all of the answers. ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  34. Emphasize Values WHAT ARE SOME OF YOUR FAMILIES VALUES?______________ It is important to talk about what your family believes and why. If you and your children talk about your family values in a practical manner, your children will think about them when they make choices in life. ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  35. Moving beyond Facts Give them accurate information as well as talk about the feelings, attitudes and values. Tell the children about reproduction, even about intercourse, this is not going to rob them of innocence. But remember always to link the anatomic facts to love, caring and respect involved in a romantic relationship. ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  36. Be Direct State your feelings about specific issues. For example oral sex or intercourse. Consider the messages you want your kids to hear and be open in sharing your values and concerns. Do not be afraid to get down to specifics. ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  37. Be clearabout what you expect from children. Try saying: “We think that waiting to have sex, at least until you’re out of school, is the best idea. What do you think? (or) “What kinds of things do you think might happen if you have sex as a teen?” ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  38. Boost Self Esteem "How do I help my kids feel good about themselves? I spend time with them. And I listen! I listen at least three times as much as I talk. My kids know I’m somebody they can turn to.” _______________________ ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  39. Help your children As teens, they are making choices everyday and sometime they don’t know what the right way is. So you, as parent, give them support considering pros and cons of choices without judging them. ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  40. Reassure them All kids can have a hard time liking themselves. They may feel confused about the changes going on in their bodies. Often, they are worried about being normal, being liked, & “fitting in.” Your time = Your support Show up at school events. Cheer them on in sports. Accompany them to dance lessons. Even in passing they can feel your encouragement & support. Time is life’s most valued asset ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  41. Ask them about what’s going on in their lives and give them your full attention. Choose to do something together that they enjoy. Even doing the dishes or other chores together can help them feel loved. Create a climate at home where your children can ask about sex. Let them know that it is OK to ask. Having a calm and non-critical atmosphere for discussions Encouragethem in something THEY enjoy doing ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  42. Assert your permanence Make sure they know that you love them no matter what grades they get, no matter what choices they make, and no matter what problems they have. Kids who are loved and supported in this manner tend to make better choices for themselves and learn more quickly from their mistakes. ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  43. Know the Facts! They want to know the information from you as you are their most reliable source! ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  44. Keeping safe Saying no to a touch that doesn’t feel right or is confusing & getting help right away ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  45. Don’ts… • Do not set aside a special day or time to talk about sex • Do not postpone discussions of sex until you think the adolescent is involved in a relationship • Do not try to say everything at once • Do not overwhelm them with information • Do not break their privacy ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  46. Don't overreact!!! It just makes things worse! Chances are if your child does something you don’t approve of they already feel terrible for disappointing you. Speaking calmly and explaining why you feel the way you do is more effective than overreacting. ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  47. “Sex Talk” Barriers • “I don’t want to encourage them to have sex” • “I don’t want them to think by talking about sex I am giving them permission to go do it” • “My kids took a sex-education class already. They already know this stuff. • “My parents never discussed sex with me and I turned out fine.” • “I don’t need to discuss this now. My child knows that sex is only for married people” ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  48. Scenarios/Practicum Role playing is a great way to learn how to prepare, plan and practice your reaction to certain questions or scenarios. Next, we will dissect a number of different situations to help build strong safer sex discussion skills. ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  49. Questions What happens if my period comes while I’m in school? What is an orgasm? Is oral sex really sex? What is a virgin? ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

  50. Questions Why is there hair on your private parts? Is it O.K. for me to have a discharge? Are condoms really necessary? Doesn’t the bible say that God put us on this earth to reproduce? ACQC- CAPP -EDU- GJ/TG

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