Writing Coherently: Making Use of Parallel Structure Sheryl York Lake Michigan Writing Project

1. Writing Coherently: Making Use of Parallel Structure Sheryl York Lake Michigan Writing Project

2. What I noticed…… 1. I noticed that my students struggled with a sense of rhythm throughout their writing. • “You get to meet new people, experience college life, and you also get hit with the reality of life.” • “She grabbed a towel and wrapped up my leg and took me to the hospital.” • “It had three showers with no shower curtains, five toilets, four sinks, eight of the eight foot foldable lunchroom tables, and three televisions.

3. According to Kirby and Liner, “Good writing is rich in imagery and associations, strong in rhythm and repetition, filled with wordplay….Good writing seems to flow” (101-102).

4. I noticed that my students needed a plan of development; they needed a map for the journey. Perhaps a thesis statement with parallel structure would be helpful. “I did not enjoy my years in high school.” “I was skipping class, I was avoiding my homework, and I was getting involved with the wrong crowd.” “William Forrester is a interesting individual.” “William Forrester is a reclusive author suffering from loneliness, an intelligent man struggling with loss, and a serene individual unraveling life’s realities.”

5. 3. I noticed that when we post online and/or complete an online application, we often have a limited number of characters with which to communicate. “I have learned new ways of thinking, different behavior, and how to take control of my feelings.” (approx.101 characters) “I’ve learned new ways of thinking, behaving, and controlling my feelings. (approx. 74 characters)

6. 1. “CO” what? • You are the Event Coordinator for the Amway Grand. What do you do? • You tell your kids to cooperate. What do you mean? Give me some examples. • Your coworker has just been promoted and is now the manager of your department. How might this affect your relationship? • Remember those coordinating conjunctions? What are they, and what’s their purpose? 2. What does it mean to write coherently? Give general notes on parallel structure. Day One: Intro and Notes

7. Activity #1 Day Two: Recognize parallel structure Using mentor texts, choose at least two examples of parallel structure. When ready, add them to the lists. OR Using their own essays, find examples and add them to the lists.

8. Activity #2 • Using the sentences provided, create parallel structure…..one “piece” per craft stick. For example…… “It had three showers with no shower curtains, five toilets, four sinks, eight of the eight foot foldable lunchroom tables, and three televisions. Day Two: Create Parallel Structure

9. Visual: Tongue Depressors It had three showers with no shower curtains, three toilets with rusty well water, and four sinks with grimy faucets.

10. After much practice…. From this…. “I did not enjoy my years in high school.” To this… “I was skipping class, I was avoiding my homework, and I was getting involved with the wrong crowd.”

11. From this… “William Forrester is a interesting individual.” To this….. “William Forrester is a reclusive author suffering from loneliness, an intelligent man struggling with loss, and a serene individual unraveling life’s realities.”

12. On future essays…. 1. Some thesis statements will include parallel structure. 2. Students will be asked to label parallel structure in their future essays (rough drafts only). 3. If students see/hear examples of parallel structure elsewhere, email me or bring in the example.

13. In Writing Well, Zinsser says that “...they hear what they are readingfar more than you realize. Therefore such matters as rhythm and alliteration are vital to every sentence…. Such considerations of sound and rhythm should be woven through everything you write” (36-37).

14. “Good writing observes the conventions of mechanics and usage.” -Kirby and Liner

15. What about punctuation?

18. After Becky’s demo on Tuesday, I heard a burning question. It really challenged my thinking. For a moment, I thought I was back in my middle school classroom. “Do you have more games?”

19. “Connecting Ordinary Objects With The Writing Process.” What does this have to do with writing? Sheryl York Lake Michigan Writing Project

20. Activity 3:Learning and Legos Volunteer A • Objective: Create the same object that Volunteer B has in front of him/her. • Listen • Refrain from asking questions or making comment • NO communication: ************************* The burning question: Volunteer B • Objective: Help volunteer A create the same object that you have. • Give directions. • You may NOT ask questions or expect answers. • Do not look at your partner’s progress. ****************************** What does this have to do with the writing process?

21. Activity 4: Puzzle Some guidelines 1. Your objective is to create five shapes that are all the same size; you must all have one shape (made up of several puzzle pieces) in front of you. 2. Neither verbal nor non-verbal communication is allowed. Remain quiet. No pointing. No head nodding. No sign language.

22. 3. You may only give; you may not take another student’s shape. He/she may GIVE it to you, but you may not TAKE it. • 4. You must have at least one piece directly in front of you at all times. In other words, you cannot give all of your pieces away or throw all of your pieces in the middle and hope that someone else will take them and create a shape. • 5. As you attempt to solve the puzzle, keep thinking about how you can make a connection between the writing process and this activity.

23. References Image Grammar by Harry Noden Chapter 3: “The Artist’s Rhythms” In addition to explaining various types of parallel structure, Noden offers several templates for creating parallel structure. Good for middle-high school. Inside Out: Developmental Strategies for Teaching Writing by Dan Kirby and Tom Liner Eats, Shoots, & Leaves: Why Commas Really DO Make a Difference! Illustrations are excellent for reinforcing the importance of commas. Good for all grade levels.