Table Manners/Mock Luncheon

1. Table Manners/Mock Luncheon By : James Peterson Jr. Keon Scott

2. Place Setting • Formal Place Setting • The utensils that are already set up on the table so you can use utensils in an “outside in” order • PLATES • Service Plate- Is placed in the center of the place setting. • Butter Plate-A small bread plate is placed above the forks, above and to the left of the service plate. • GLASSES • Water Glass- The water goblet is placed above each guest's dinner knife. The other glasses are then arranged around the water glass as follows: • Red Wine Glass- Red wine glasses have a wider globe and may be cupped in the palm of your hand if you choose. • White Wine Glass- The glass with the longer stem and cylindrical globe is the white wine glass.  White wine glasses should only be held by the stem.

3. Place setting (continued) • FORKS • Salad Fork- Directly to the plate's left. One (1) inch from the plate. • Dinner Fork- Left of the salad fork. • Fish Fork- On the dinner fork's left. • KNIVES • Dinner Knife- (Or meat knife if meat will be served.) Directly to the right of the plate. One (1) inch from the plate. • Fish Knife- On the dinner knife's right. • Butter Knife- On the butter plate, diagonally with the handle toward the guest. • SPOONS • Soup Spoon and/or Fruit Spoon- Right of the knives.

4. The START • At a small table of only two to four people, wait until everyone else has been served before starting to eat. At a formal or business meal, you should either wait until everyone is served to start or begin when the host asks you to. • Unfold your napkin in one smooth motion without "snapping" or "shaking" it open. Use your napkin frequently during the meal to blot or pat, not wipe, your lips. Blot your lips before taking a drink of your beverage-especially if you're a woman wearing lipstic • Use the silverware farthest from your plate first. Here's the Silverware and dinnerware rule: Eat to your left, drink to your right. Any food dish to the left is yours, and any glass to the right is yours.

5. The start (Continued) • American Style: Knife in right hand, fork in left hand holding food. After a few bite-sized pieces of food are cut, place knife on edge of plate with blades facing in. Eat food by switching fork to right hand (unless you are left handed). A left hand, arm or elbow on the table is bad manners. • Continental/European Style: Knife in right hand, fork in left hand. Eat food with fork still in left hand. The difference is that you don't switch hands-you eat with your fork in your left hand, with the prongs curving downward. Both utensils are kept in your hands with the tines pointed down throughout the entire eating process. If you take a drink, you do not just put your knife down, you put both utensils down into the resting position: cross the fork over the knife. • Once used, your utensils (including the handles), must not touch the table again. Always rest forks, knives, and spoons on the side of your plate. • For more formal dinners, from course to course, your tableware will be taken away and replaced as needed. To signal that your are done with the course, rest your fork, tines up, and knife blade in, with the handles resting at five o'clock an tips pointing to ten o'clock on your plate. • Any unused silverware is simply left on the table.

6. Talking to the servers • The manner in which you treat your serving staff will be noticed by others. Your people skills will be reflected at the dinner table and will make an impression on your dining partners. Use the word "please" when making a request or asking a question. Make your questions and requests clear and brief. Avoid barking orders at your waiter or waitress. The establishment’s staff should always be treated cordially in the name of good manners, regardless of the situation. • It is polite to say "thank you" to the servers only when they bring something special that you requested and after they have removed any used items. A simple smile and eye contact—not required, but appropriate—is sufficient to acknowledge their service. You don’t want to disrupt the flow of the meal and conversation every time something is brought to the table.

7. Rules & tips • #1 Tasting- Accepting another person's offer to taste a morsel of her dish - or offering a bite of yours – are acceptable table manners as it's handled discreetly. Either hand your fork to the person, who can spear a bite-sized piece from her plate and hand the fork back to you, or (if the person is sitting close by) hold your plate toward her so that she can put a morsel on the edge. • Tip #2 Excusing Yourself- When you need to get up to go to the restroom, it isn't necessary to say where you're going-a simple "Excuse me, please; Leaving without a word is rude. • Tip #3 Posture- You needn't sit stiff as a rail at the dinner table, but hunching your shoulders over the plate (a posture often associated with using a fork like a shovel) is a definite "do not." Likewise, slouching back in your chair (which makes it look as if you're not interested in the meal) is bad table manners when eating with others. •  Tip #4 Elbows- As for not putting your elbows on the table, this drummed-into-us taboo applies only when you are actually eating. It's a different story when no utensils are being used; in fact, putting your elbows on the table while leaning forward a bit during a mealtime conversation shows that you're listening intently.

8. Rules & tips (continued) • Tip #5 Fidgeting- When waiting for the food to arrive or after the meal, you may want to keep your hands in your lap, if only to resist the temptation of fiddling with the utensils or other items. Refrain from drumming your fingers, jiggling your knee, or other fidgety habits, and always keep your hands away from your hair. • Tip #6 Cutting Food- Cut your food into only one or two bite-sized pieces at a time. Doing this makes sense, since a plateful of cut-up food is not only unattractive but cools and dries out more quickly than food that is mostly intact. • Tip #7 Chewing Food-Once you start to eat, don't literally bite off more than you can chew: Take a manageable bite, chew it well, and swallow it before taking another. Also remember that smacking, slurping, and collecting food in a ball in one cheek are major faux pas. When you have a mouthful of food, it is bad table manners to do two more things: taking a drink and talking. If you have more than a few words to say, swallow your food, rest your fork on your plate, and speak before you resume eating. • Tip #8 Reaching- Just how close does something on the table have to be before you reach out and get it yourself? That's simple: within easy reach of your arm when you're leaning only slightly forward. Don't lean past the person sitting next to you or lunge to perform what's known as the boardinghouse reach. A request to "please pass the [item]" is required for everything beyond that invisible boundary, as is a thank-you to whoever does the passing. •  Tip #9 Unfamiliar Foods-You're faced with unfamiliar foods. If a food you're not sure how to eat comes on a platter of appetizers - a type of sushi, perhaps, or crab in the shell - you, as a polite diner, have three choices of how to proceed: (1) Wait until someone else starts to eat and follow suit. (2) Ask how the food should be eaten (fingers or fork, for example). (3) Avoid the food altogether.

9. More Rules & Tips • Don't clean up spills with your own napkin and don't touch items that have dropped on the floor. You can use your napkin to protect yourself from spills. Then, simply and politely ask your server to clean up and to bring you a replacement for the soiled napkin or dirty utensil • Guests should do their best to mingle and make light conversation with everyone. Do not talk excessively loud. Give others equal opportunities for conversation. Talk about cheerful, pleasant things at the table • Do not blow your nose at the dinner table. Excuse yourself to visit the restroom. Wash your hands before returning to the dining room. If you cough, cover your mouth with your napkin to stop the spread of germs and muffle the noise. If your cough becomes unmanageable, excuse yourself to visit the restroom. Wash your hands before returning to the dining room. • Turn off your cell phone or switch it to silent or vibrate mode before sitting down to eat, and leave it in your pocket or purse. It is impolite to answer a phone during dinner. If you must make or take a call, excuse yourself from the table and step outside of the restaurant. • Do not use a toothpick or apply makeup at the table. • Whenever a woman leaves the table or returns to sit, all men seated with her should stand up.

10. Ordering Alcohol • It has become almost a norm not to drink alcoholic beverages at a business meeting. Whether you are a guest or a host, remember that drinking clouds decision-making abilities. Don’t feel pressured to order liquor just because others are ordering alcoholic beverages. Juice and iced tea are appropriate. Perrier with lime always works, and ordering it in a wine glass lessens the pressure, as it actually looks like a white wine spritzer. • If you are the host, and sense that it would be proper to accompany your guest, one glass of wine is the most you are supposed to drink at a luncheon meeting.

11. Talking business • If the purpose of your meeting is business, it is not appropriate to leap into the topic as soon as you are seated. Take your time and allow your guest to relax. Begin with small talk. It is important to establish or to reinforce rapport with your guest. • Do not bring up business before the entree is consumed. Be sensitive to when your guest is ready to talk business. Most people prefer to wait and talk business only over dessert and coffee. Others may want to plunge right in; therefore, begin discussing business when the client appears ready. A pleasant conversation and meal will often do more for your business relations than a nuts-and-bolts discussion. Be especially sensitive when entertaining clients from other cultures. Americans in general tend to rush over meals. For most cultures, dining is a ritual that flows slowly and pleasantly. Do not be surprised if your client does not even discuss any business over a meal. Your guest will give you signals, so be alert

12. Taking Notes • The most appropriate way to take notes during a business meal is to use a letter-sized note pad in a professional portfolio that you place on the table after the meal is finished. You can also use a small notepad (no larger than 5" X 8") at your place on the edge of the table to capture notes during the meal. This is especially useful if your guest chooses to discuss business during the meal. Avoid using a loose pad that shows the leftover edges of pages ripped out. This is unprofessional and disrespectful to your client and to your company.

13. The Tip • At a restaurant, always leave a tip. Tips can vary from 15% to 25%. Server: 15% to 20% of the bill; 25% for extraordinary service. Remember that the amount you tip reflects the total price before any coupons, gift certificates, etc. You can leave the tip for the server on the table, if you prefer, or include it in the credit card. Say ‘thank you" when you give the money

14. Paying The bill • At a business meal, it’s the responsibility of the host to reach for the bill. It is not appropriate to split the bill with your guest. • If you organized the meal on behalf of your boss, if he/she does not reach for the bill, you should pay it without any fuzz, and if appropriate, claim it later on expenses.

15. The Finish • When you finish your meal, place your napkin loosely folded on the right side of the table. This indicates that you are ready to leave. • The business meal is not over until you are out of the restaurant. Before leaving the restaurant, a side trip to the restroom is appropriate. If this is necessary, the parties meet again and leave the building together. It is not appropriate for either the host or the guest to leave first. The parties would shake hands, and may discuss the next meeting before leaving the building.

16. Following up • After a business luncheon or any other type of meeting where you were the guest, it is proper etiquette to send a "thank you" note via e-mail within 24 hours after the event. If you don’t have access to e-mail, a phone call would be equally appropriate. If a written thank you note can get to your host/hostess no later than two days after the event, this would be preferable. Since most communications in business today are conducted via e-mail, written thank-you notes are the most memorable. In an era of "high tech and low touch," a written card would have the most impact in conveying your message