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This chapter explores options for composing sentences and provides guidelines for editing sentences. It covers nonsexist and nondiscriminatory language, proofreading strategies, and logical fallacies. The chapter also discusses sentence modification, clause types, active and passive voice, diction and tone, jargon, nominalization, and guidelines for editing sentences.
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The Call to Write,Third edition Chapter 24, Working with Sentences
Chapter overview • Looks at options for composing sentences, and gives guidelines for editing sentences • Examines nonsexist and nondiscriminatory language • Provides strategies for proofreading sentences by looking at 10 common problems, as well 10 problems for ESL writers • Concludes by looking at logical fallacies
Options for composing sentences • Coordination links two or more clauses to show their equal weight in a sentence. • Subordination links clauses in ways that show that some clauses modify, qualify, or comment on the main clause. • See pages 682-683 for examples.
Modification • Another way to compose more interesting sentences is to modify, or add details, to some of the words. • Modifiers are used with nouns, adverbs, verbs, phrases, and clauses. • See the examples on page 684.
Two types of clauses A clause is a group of words that includes a subject and an object. There are two types of clauses. • An independent clause stands alone; it expresses a complete idea. • A dependent clause must be combined with an independent clause.
Active and passive voice Active or passive voice refers to the way sentences are written. • Joe hit the ball (active). • The ball was hit by Joe (passive). • The active voice is the best choice under most circumstances; however, scientific writing is often done in the passive voice. • See pages 686-687 for more details.
Diction and tone • Diction refers to word choices made by the writer. These choices also affect the tone of the document. • Tone reveals the attitude of the writer. • Tone ranges from formal to informal.
Informal to formal • Informal: The new Harry Potter movie is just totally awesome. (Okay to write in an e-mail to a friend). • Formal: The recently released Harry Potter movie has done well in its opening weeks, and the general consensus of reviewers is that it has a strong plot and solid casting. (More appropriate for an essay).
Jargon • Jargon refers to the special terminology used by people in the same profession or group. • Think of the terms that the following people might use: police officers, computer geeks, nurses, or teachers.
Jargon, cont. • The text comments that “to speak and write in that vernacular is a sign of membership” (689). • However, if your audience is not part of that group, your jargon will become barriers to their understanding your document.
Nominalization • Academic and professional jargon results from a number of strategies, including nominalization. • This happens when new words are created by adding –tion, -ity, -ness, -ance, -ment, and -ism to existing words. • Unfortunately, too much of this packed into one sentence can turn a simple idea into one that is almost unreadable.
Guidelines for editing sentences Editing a document by looking at individual sentences is an important part of the writing process. Three main guidelines to edit sentences include: • Clarity (clearness) • Emphasis • Variety
Clarity Refers to clearness of a sentence. Problems that interfere with clarity include: • Confusing sentence structure • Wordiness • Vagueness • See pages 691-693 for examples and strategies for correcting them.
Emphasis Direct the readers to the most important part of a sentence, which is usually the beginning and ending. To do so, look at: • Word order • Parallelism and repetition • Climatic order (saving the best for last) • See pages 693-695 for examples and details.
Variety • Variety refers to having sentences that differ in their length and structure; otherwise, all of the sentences will start to sound alike, and can become monotonous. • See the text on page 695 for an explanation of when shorter, middle length, and longer sentences are most effective. • Two strategies: Vary sentence length, and add elements of surprise.
Nonsexist language • See the Ethics box, pages 698-699. • “… certain words and phrases convey attitudes about racial, ethnic, and other social groups” (698). • Writers have a responsibility to be aware of how their language choices reflect stereotypes and offend people.
Three guidelines • Replace masculine nouns with more inclusive words. • Replace masculine pronouns when referring to people in general. • Use nongendered terms when discussing occupations and social roles. See pages 698-699 for examples.
Ten common problems • The text next discusses the 10 most common problems found with sentences. • This section is one to which you will want to refer as you look at your own papers, as well as those of your peers, because it gives examples and explanations of the errors, as well as ways to edit or fix them.
Fragments, Comma Splices, and Fused Sentences • Sentence fragments do not express a complete idea. • Comma splices join two complete sentences using a comma. • Fused sentences join two sentences but do not use a comma. • See pages 697 and 700-701 for examples, as well as remedies.
Agreement and verb shift • Subject-verb agreement means that singular verbs go with singular subjects. • Verb shift refers to changes in tense that are not consistent or logical. • See pages 701-703.
Pronoun agreement • Pronouns need to agree with their antecedents: Singular antecedents take singular pronouns. • An antecedent is the word to which the pronoun refers. Jane always drinks milk with her meals; “Jane” is the antecedent for the pronoun “her.” • See page 703 for more details, including how to treat collective nouns.
Pronoun reference, modifiers • Pronoun reference: readers should be able to connect the pronoun with its antecedent. Modifiers can be problematic in three ways: • Dangling modifiers use the –ing ending, but their placement in the sentence is confusing. • Misplaced modifiers have a word or phrase that seems to be in the wrong place • Disruptive modifiers separate the subject and verb. See pages 704-705 for more details.
Mixed construction, faulty predication and parallelism • Mixed construction refers to sentences that seem to shift sentence structure. • Faulty predication happens when the second part of a sentence seems to be on a different topic than the first part of the sentence. • Parallelism refers to putting items in a list in the same structure. • See pages 705-707 for more details.
Ten problems for ESL writers • The next section of the chapter covers the 10 most common errors for ESL writers. • “ESL” refers to English as a Second Language. • These writers share some struggles, which are not so much about how sentences are put together as they are about how to use specific types of words such as articles.
Nouns, pronouns and articles • Subject/pronoun repetition: Refers to repeating the subject, which is not done in English. • Articles (a, an, the): Refers to knowing when to use them. • Singular and plural proper nouns: A proper noun is the capitalized name of a person, place, group, or thing. Singular nouns rarely use an article, but plural nouns often do.
Nouns, pronouns and articles, cont. • Singular- and plural-count noun: These terms refer to words for people and things that can be counted. Use “a” or “an” before a singular-count noun when it refers to something in general. Use “the” when referring to something specifically. • Noncount nouns name things that can’t be counted and take no article or “the.” See pages 708-709 for more details.
This, that, these, and those • This, that, these and those: These words are sometimes called demonstrative adjectives or pronouns because they point at something specific. • This and that are singular; these and those are plural. Make sure they agree in number with the nouns they modify.
Adjective form and sequence • Adjective form: Adjectives never take a plural form to agree with nouns they modify. • Adjective sequence: When using more than one adjective to modify a noun, there are some guidelines to follow. • See pages 709-710 for guidelines and examples.
Prepositions at, on, and in • These prepositions indicate time and location. • Time: use “at” for a specific time and “on” for days and dates. • Use “in” for months, seasons, and times during the day.
Prepositions at, on, and in, cont. • Use “at” for specific addresses, named locations, general locations, or locations for a specific activity. • Use “on” for names of streets, modes of transportation, floors of buildings, pages, and tracts of land. • Use “in” for the names of geographical areas of land (cities, states, countries, continents).
Participles • Use the present (-ing) form to describe when someone or something produces a result. • Use the past (-ed) form to describe how someone or something experiences such results. • See pages 711-712 for more details.
Auxiliary verbs • In the present tense, third person –s endings are needed on verbs. • Auxiliary verbs: do, does, did; and have, has had. • Use the base form of the main verb with do, does, and did. • Use the past participle (-ed) form for have, has, and had.
Conditional clauses and idiomatic two- and three-word verbs • Conditional (if) clauses allow a write to state a condition and then describe the result. See pages 712-713 for details on the proper tense to use to convey the correct result. • Idiomatic two- and three-word verbs: Refer to verbs that take on a preposition or adverb, and change their meaning. Look into the means to investigate; see page 713 for more examples.
Logical fallacies • “A flaw in reasoning that weakens the legitimacy of a writer’s argument” (714). • They are to be avoided; however, we see them used sometimes either intentionally or unintentionally in political campaigns as well as advertising. • Here is a list of nine types of logical fallacies.
Faulty cause and effect, false analogy • Faulty cause-and-effect relationship: Mistakes a sequence of events for a causal relationship. • False analogy: Makes the assumption that because things resemble each other in some ways, conclusions about one can be applied to the other.
Slippery slope • Slippery slope: Predicts a chain of events that is seen as unavoidable and catastrophic, so “if we do X, Y will happen, and we will be doomed!”
Red herring, ad populum and more • Red herring: Something thrown into an argument to distract from the real issue. • Ad populum: Refers to arguments that address bias and prejudice, not reasoning. • Ad hominem: Refers to personal attacks on an opponent rather than rational debate on issues.
Bandwagon, begging the question, and either/or • Bandwagon appeal: “Everyone else is doing it” (used extensively in advertising) • Begging the question: Refers to assuming something that needs to be proven. • Either/or: Reasoning that polarizes people and issues with the idea that there are really only two options.
Student Companion Website • Go to the student side of the Web site for exercises, chapter overviews, and links to writing resources for this chapter: http://www.ablongman.com/trimbur • Click on the textbook cover, and then select Student Resources.