. Strategies for Success PTA meeting January 8, 2013 Susan Levine Donna Brennan

1. . Strategies for Success PTA meeting January 8, 2013 Susan Levine Donna Brennan

2. Students - go with Ms. Brennan Talk about organization and study skills Parents – stay with Ms. Levine Learn about your child’s brain and how best to help them be successful in school

3. If I had a magic wand

4. The brain At the McLean Hospital in Belmont, Mass., Deborah Yurgelun-Todd and a group of researchers have studied how adolescents perceive emotion as compared to adults. The scientists looked at the brains of 18 children between the ages of 10 and 18 and compared them to 16 adults using functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI). Both groups were shown pictures of adult faces and asked to identify the emotion on the faces. Using fMRI, the researchers could trace what part of the brain responded as subjects were asked to identify the expression depicted in the picture. The results surprised the researchers. The adults correctly identified the expression as fear. Yet the teens answered "shocked, surprised, angry." And the teens and adults used different parts of their brains to process what they were feeling. The teens mostly used the amygdala, a small almond shaped region that guides instinctual or "gut" reactions, while the adults relied on the frontal cortex, which governs reason and planning. As the teens got older, the center of activity shifted more toward the frontal cortex and away from the cruder response of the amygdala. • First Brain – Reflex brain • Basic bodily functions – swallowing, blinking • Fight an flight • This part of the brain hijacks the brain under stress

6. 2nd Brain – Feeling Brain Teens experience their emotions at twice the intensity of adults. While you probably don’t want to allow your teen’s emotions to rule the house, it can be helpful to give them a break and apply some empathy when emotions are high This is the part of where emotions live In puberty – the flux of hormones – make the lows and highs more extreme:

7. Moody middle schooler Parent Share Expert advice: Try looking back: Take some time to reflect back on your adolescent years. Try to remember some of the overwhelming emotions and feelings of inadequacy you experienced. Although much is the same, today’s adolescent faces complicated situations and pressures we never thought possible. Find support: One of the most helpful things you can do for yourself and your teen is to connect with other parents who are in the same position. You will feel better once you know you are not alone in this struggle and that your teen’s mood swings are typical adolescent development. Consider brain development: Although hormones get blamed for most of the moodiness adolescents experience, new scientific evidence proves that brain development plays a very important role. The last area of the brain to develop (in the early 20’s) is the frontal lobe where impulse control, judgment, and decision-making lie. The brain has yet to catch up with their changing bodies. Teach your teen to journal: Your teen cannot always justify his emotional reactions or tell you why he feels the way he does. Encourage him to keep a private daily journal. This will enable him to release some of his emotional overload and stress in a safe productive way.

8. More advice Be accessible: Let your teen know you are available to talk. Do more listening than talking and try not to lecture or belittle his experience. Judgment will only alienate your teen, and he will not be as likely to come to you in the future.

9. Don’t take it personally: Keep your cool and don’t overreact to your teen’s tone of voice or words. Calmly remind him that to get respect he must show respect. Teach him the importance of an apology and don’t hesitate to give one yourself if you need to. Give plenty of space: Oftentimes parents want to rush in and do everything possible to help their teen through a dilemma. The best course of action may be to step back and let him figure things out for himself. This lets him know you believe he can make appropriate choices and that you have confidence in his judgment. Praise him when things turn out well. Watch for serious behavior changes: Although mood swings are typical don’t overlook prolonged depression, erratic behavior, failing grades or suspected substance abuse. Be prepared to seek out professional help if needed.

10. 3rd brain – thinking brain Surrounds the other two parts of the brain Thinking…knowledge …skills..memory…retrieval skills…CONSEQUENCES Not fully developed until 18-25 When you ask your middle schooler “What were you thinking?” They were not thinking!!!!! We need to help them think – look beyond today and at consequences for actions

11. What does this mean? Don’t have brain maturity • LESS LIKELY TO – stay organized • Show responsibility • Plan • Prioritize • Evaluate consequences We don’t know the effects that technology will have on kids • Multi task? • How do they process it? • Do they have to have graphics? • Instant gratification? What are your concerns?

12. Tips and tricks Need to learn how to study Need to learn how to organize Metacognition – middle schoolers respond well to learning how we learn Evaluating self – did I learn that ? What should I try next time? Relate learning to the world of ME Small amounts at a time – with repetition Peer study groups (because you don’t know anything) Choice

13. More tips and tricks: • Treat your teen with respect. • Listen with your head and your heart. • Allow your teens to express their emotions. • Be comfortable exercising your authority and your flexibility when appropriate. • Get help when you need it…getting help from a professional is a sign of strength, not weakness. •Allow others to play a role; it really does take a village to raise a child. Secrets to Success in Parenting Your Teen by Sue Blaney t www.PleaseStoptheRollercoaster.com t www.ParentingTeensInfo.com

14. Ms. Brennan shares for the kids. QUESTIONS? http://quizlet.com/