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Agenda

Agenda. The problem of bullying Social skills for all young people If your child is being bullied If your child is bullying others What else you can do. What is bullying?. It’s. repeatedly. and. purposely. hurting someone. with less. power. Bullying vs. having a conflict.

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Agenda

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  1. Agenda • The problem of bullying • Social skills for all young people • If your child is being bullied • If your child is bullying others • What else you can do

  2. What is bullying? It’s repeatedly and purposely hurting someone with less power.

  3. Bullyingvs. having a conflict What’s the difference?

  4. Bullying is EVERYONE’S problem.

  5. The good news: You can do something about it. • Teach empathy. • Boost self-esteem. • Promote respect and nonviolence.

  6. Bullying is just part of being a kid. FACT: It’s violence. FACT: It has lasting effects. FACT: It’s common.

  7. Being bullied toughens children up. FACT: Being bullied can cause: • academic problems • social isolation • mental health problems

  8. Being a bully has long-term consequences, too. Bullies are at higher risk for: • academic problems • social isolation • violence and crime

  9. All bullying is physical. FACT: Bullying can also be: • verbal • indirect (relational)

  10. For the bully, it’s all about

  11. Any child can be bullied. • passive targets • provocative targets

  12. The power of bystanders The silent majority

  13. Check in • Bullies target “weaker” children to feel more powerful. • Bullying has long-term consequences for everyone. • Bullies, targets and bystanders all play a role in bullying.

  14. Social skills—the foundation for preventing bullying • Make your values clear. • Walk the walk.

  15. Empathy • prevents bullying behavior • makes bullying unacceptable

  16. Tips for teaching your child empathy • Respect your child’s feelings. • Talk about yours.

  17. Putting empathy into action: all people deserve respect. • Be a role model. • Foster an open mind. • Make your expectations clear.

  18. Assertiveness • standing up for yourself • respecting the rights of others

  19. Assertive-speak • “You” message: YOU thief! I can’t believe YOU took my book without asking me. If YOU do it again, YOU’LL be sorry.” • “I” message: • I (feel this way) when (this happens). I need (this to happen).

  20. Assertive body language • Stand tall. • Make eye contact. • Speak firmly.

  21. Managing emotions

  22. Strategies for managing anger • Recognize it. • Calm down. • Find healthy emotional outlets.

  23. Resolving conflicts…PEACEFULLY

  24. Challenge media messages. • Watch together. • Set limits. • Talk about it.

  25. Check in • Model empathy and respect. • Teach assertiveness, anger management and conflict resolution skills.

  26. If your child is being bullied No news isn’t always good news. Don’t wait for your child to come to you.

  27. changes in behavior • avoiding school • drop in grades • missing belongings • headaches and stomachaches

  28. What would you do? • Take it seriously. • Empower your child. • Report it.

  29. Two common responses to bullying—and why they don’t work. • “Just ignore it.” • “Fight back!”

  30. Helpful advice for your child • Stay calm. • Be assertive. • Get help.

  31. Staying calm and confident • visualization • self-talk • looking confident

  32. Defusing a bully • Agree with the facts. • Make a joke. • Reframe it.

  33. Which is assertive? b. a. “I don’t like you calling me names. I want you to stop now.” “Stop it! You’re hurting my feelings!”

  34. Safety first • Avoid the bully until the conflict gets resolved. • Think safety in numbers. • Get away and get help.

  35. Practice makes perfect. • Role play. • Practice decision making.

  36. Boost your child’s self-esteem. • Emphasize the positive. • Encourage your child.

  37. Friendship is the best protection. Help your child: • join in • overcome shyness • improve social skills.

  38. Check in • Be there for your child. • Teach assertive responses to bullying. • Help your child build self-esteem and make friends.

  39. If your child is bullying Many parents feel: • angry • defensive.

  40. Be firm but loving with your child. • Set clear limits. • Be consistent. • Be loving.

  41. Getting to the root of the problem • Is my child getting enough supervision? • Do family members “bully” each other? • Is there stress at home?

  42. Talk to your child—and really listen.

  43. You can start to turn things around. • Spend more time together. • Model positive social skills.

  44. Give positive alternatives. • Encourage healthy interests. • Turn strength into leadership. • Get connected to the community.

  45. Know when to seek help.

  46. Check in • Focus on helping your child. • Teach and reward positive behavior. • Seek help.

  47. What else can I do? • Support school efforts. • Raise awareness. • Support after-school programs. • Be a role model.

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