We Teach Who We Are . . . So Why Not Teach the REAL YOU?

We Teach Who We Are. . . So Why Not Teach the REAL YOU? Pi Lambda Theta Induction Presenter: John Shindler April 18, 2015

The Real You vs The Acquired You • Real you = who you want to be. • Your “real self” is your authentic self – the essential you • You access it when you listening to your Heart – doing what is right • It is that inner voice inside you that contains vast intelligence • Acquired self = your baggage • Comes from all sorts of others stuff – some good some not so good • Is based in a lot of fear, compromise and what some call “agreements with mediocrity.” • Usually involves the thoughts in your head and cleverness

So. . . ? • Teach the Real You • It is not like some people (or your fears) would say that it is idealistic or unrealistic. • It is what will make you feel like you are being the true you. Listening to your heart. And will progressively allow you to become free of your fears and baggage … and get excellent results!!!. • And Don’t be too attached to what the acquired you is telling you to do. It loves clever ways to ignore your heart, and it hates change, growth and excellence.

Why things happen - Really • In our research related to teachers, what we find is that there is an almost perfect correlation between what people believe, what they do and then what they get as a result What teachers did What Results They Got

R –> X –> O or Be –> Do -> Have • It starts with our References/R – that is our values, beliefs, thinking, conditioning, assumptions, personal narrative and world-view, etc. • That R becomes what we do – our actions/X, practices, emotions, verbal and non verbal communication. • And as Gandhi said – “the ends are implied in the means” – in other words, what we get (outcomes/O) will be a result of what we do.

The Real Us is All About “YES” • The “Real You” loves growing and becoming a great teacher. You can feel it every day when you create, learn, have great ideas, feel care for your students, inspire others, have inspiring thoughts. Your real you has no ego, does not need to be respected or admired, and is not in competition with anyone. • The real you lives on “YES” (we can find the yes, when we do what our heart is telling us).

But your Acquired You has a lot of “No” • Your “Acquired You” includes a lot of clever excuses for doing less than your best. It is easily threatened, takes things personally, and is always comparing itself to others, judges others almost as much as it judges you. It wants things a certain way or feels resentful - which includes how students and colleagues should be. It is always fighting and resisting what “is.”

So who will you listen to? • References -> Actions -> Outcomes • Which self are you using to drive your thinking? Are the references that are telling you what to do coming from your Real Self or from your Acquired Self? • You can tell by listening to how you feel: • The real self “yes” message feels empowering and makes you feel light and proud of yourself. • the acquired self is all over the place, but we know it when we feel tight, in denial, resistant and oppositional, or we hear our conscience gnawing at us.

Practical Application – part 1 • We can feel it when we are listening to our real self – we “know it is right.” • We feel it when we show integrity – we do what we say and/or stick to our principles (i.e., we follow-through or admit we were wrong, or stand up for ourselves) • We feel it when know we did our best • We feel it when we choose growth over comfort

Practical Application – part 2 • Clarity vs laziness

What strategies do we regularly use to communicate our expectations (from Ch4 TCM) Clarity Laziness

Practical Application part 3 • Pro-active vs Avoiding/procrastinating

The Core of a Sound and Healthy classroom Climate: A Psychology of Success (POS) • Your “real self” wants a POS to emerge – in you, in your class and in each student. • A POS = Yes ---- A POF = No • When we use POS promoting practices we feel good and right • When we use POF promoting practices we feel wrong, guilty, and like we are letting our best self down

Psychology of Success (POS) • INTERNAL vs. EXTERNAL LOCUS OF CONTROL (LOC): This factor is defined by one’s sense of internal causality and orientation toward personal responsibility. The more internal our LOC, the more we feel that our destiny is in our own hands. • SENSE OF BELONGING AND ACCEPTANCE vs. ALIENATION: This factor reflects how much one feels wanted and a part of the group, and how much one likes and accepts themselves as they are. The more one feels accepted and acceptable, the more they are able to express themselves, act authentically, and be fully present to others. • GROWTH-ORIENTATION vs. FIXED-ABILITY ORIENTATION: This factor relates to one’s thinking related to the root of their competence (Dweck, 2007). A growth-orientation approaches tasks with the question “How can I learn and grow from the process of doing this?” whereas the fixed-ability orientation asks “What will the outcome say about my innate ability in this area?” Explained in detail in the book Transformative Classroom Management

Practical Application part 4 • Vision vs survival

Where is your vision leading you? What does your heart want you to strive for? Self-directed System 3 Principle community Clear expectations belonging 2 Social contract Program rewards penalties praise Grades 1 Personal appeals and challenges Sensory

Imaginal Cells and Change Did you know that scientists have discovered that within the chrysalis/cocoon change process there are things called “imaginal cells” created that will ultimately turn into the butterfly? But early in the process the caterpillar sees the imaginal cells and tries to eat and destroy them. It wants to stay as it is. But eventually the imaginal cells become so numerous and efficient that they take over and create the beautiful butterfly. Are you resisting your positive change, like the caterpillar thinks it should? Or can you sense the imaginal cells wanting to you to become the butterfly that you were meant to become?

Presenter Contact Information John Shindler, Ph.D jshindl@calstatela.edu johnshindler@gmail.com Charter College of Education California State University, Los Angeles Alliance for the Study of School Climate (ASSC) www.calstatela.edu/schoolclimate (or just Google “School Climate”) Transformative Classroom Management www.transformativeclassroom.com (or just Google “Classroom Management Resources”)

We Teach Who We Are . . . So Why Not Teach the REAL YOU?