Top 10 Offenses in our writing

1. Top 10 Offenses in our writing i.e. I know you can do better.

2. 10. Proofread your paper. You should not sound like timbaland. • Them  sticking together is another big reason theyre family is close They all could have done been with Walter when he lost the money but instead they gonna let him pick hisself up and keep trying. • “The Way I Are”

3. 9. Use of the word like is like not a good idea like do you get what I’m saying? • Like I was like reading the book like and Beneathia and Asagui are not the same as their like in the movie. • Valley girl speak

4. 8. Fragments and run ons • When you write in fragments and run ons you just think that imgonna get were you goin with this sentence even though it doesnt seem to end when I would like for it to end. Bad idea. • Run on Minaj

5. 7. Verb tense and strength of verbs • That are what dream are made of just hoping and wanting to get a little taste of their dream. • Singular noun= without s • Singular verb= with s • Any questions? "You is. . . ."

6. Part 2 of #7- does every verb you use really need to be a linking verb? • Get is weak. So are linking verbs. Yes, I just got to use two linking verbs. • I think he hasn't had money in a long time, so she's surprised he's like that.

7. Linking verb list(for those of us who did not memorize this in the 4th grade) Am Is Are Was Were Have Has Had can Could Shall Should May Might Must Be Been Being Do Does did

8. 6. The use of first and second person • Neither you nor I are in the play Raisin in the Sun. Please don’t put us in 1959.  • All I can say is that the Younger family is far from perfect. You have to understand that they weren’t that great of a family.

9. 5. Introducing quotes and in-text citations- YES! You should use both! • This following quote  by Walter pretty much summarizes it. You tired, ain’t you? Tired of everything. Me, the boy, the way we live – this beat-up hole – everything. Ain’t you? So tired – moaning and groaning all the time, but you wouldn’t do nothing to help, would you? You couldn’t be on my side that long for nothing, could you?  Also, this quote  by Mama represents them also. Yes – I taught you that. Me and your daddy. But I thought I taught you something else too… I thought I taught you to love him.

10. 4. Complexity of a paragraph- Yep, that was the whole paragraph. • In the story Raisin in the Sun the Youngers have pride in not giving up on their dreams, not giving up on their jobs, or not to stay in the house even though everyone else told them to. 

11. 3. Your thesis is what you discuss in your whole paper. Your topic sentence is what your paragraph discusses. • When you were born, you were born into a family. (topic sentence) • If you have no focus, we don’t know where you are going.

12. 2.Repetition of information • Beneatha is self-centered about herself because she focuses only on herself and hardly on anyone else. “It’s Friday”

13. 1. Supporting claims- support what you say. Explain what you’re saying. • Walter  was upset when he heard his mother had spent the insurance money on the house and thought it wasn't fair that Beneatha got some of it for her medical school while he got nothing for his liquor store business.  Mama who always wanted her son to be happy, trustingly gave the rest of the insurance money to Walter. Holding the money in his hands, Walter thanked his mother and appreciated the trust she had in him.  Walter then gave the money to his buddies to help him getting  his liquor license without realizing that they betrayed him. As his dream fell to pieces, Walter regretted that he didn't listen to his mother, wife and sister .