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THEME – Day 6. copy. copy Theme. THEME copy. Design • Photography • Copy Workbook pages 1-2. VOICE. copy Theme. Choose the right voice and tone for your theme. VOICE. copy Theme.
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THEME – Day 6 copy
copy Theme THEMEcopy Design • Photography • Copy Workbook pages 1-2
VOICE copy Theme Choose the right voice and tone for your theme.
VOICE copy Theme • Your "voice" is the way that you "speak" on paper. It is how your words come across to the reader, and it will be different for every writer. • Voice depends on the style you choose – formal, informal, technical, chatty, poetic. • Voice depends on the words you choose to express this style - simple words, scientific words, slang words.
The 1st Sentence copy Theme • Make the first sentence memorable. • Write a sentence so good that the reader continues reading. • Hint at what will follow.
“Call me Ishmael.” copy Theme —Herman Melville, Moby-Dick (1851) • This account will be personal. • The speaker directly addresses the audience. • There appears to be a clarification of identity. • There is a biblical allusion. • Ishmael was born at Mamre, when Abraham was 86, 11 years after Abraham's arrival in what would become the land of Israel (Genesis 16:3). He grew up to be a man of the desert wilderness, with a wild and hostile attitude toward people, exactly as God described him to his mother before he was born.
It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen. —George Orwell, 1984 (1949) copy Theme Something is up. Things aren’t quite right.
copy Theme IF YOU REALLY WANT TO HEAR about it, the first thing you'll probably want to know is where I was born, and what my lousy childhood was like, and how my parents were occupied and all before they had me, and all that David Copperfield kind of crap, but I don't feel like going into it, if you want to know the truth. —J. D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye (1951) • First-person account. • It is very conversational in tone. • The speaker is cynical. • The speaker knows what is expected, • but he doesn’t have the inclination or energy • to play the “game.”
copy Theme Time is not a line but a dimension, like the dimensions of space. —Margaret Atwood, Cat's Eye (1988) • Very philosophical statement that causes the reader to ask, “What do you mean? Can you give me an example?” • It is about simultaneous happenings. • It is not a day-by-day or month-by-month account. • The material is organized around something other than time.
copy Theme All this happened, more or less. —Kurt Vonnegut, Slaughterhouse-Five (1969) • This is not a reliable narrator. • What would you think if someone asserted • that “all this happened” and followed it • with a disclaimer like “more or less”? • What is he/she leaving out? • What is he/she adding?
copy Theme Now you try? What do you know about this novel? It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair. —Charles Dickens, A Tale of Two Cities (1859)
copy Theme NOW TRY SOME SONG LYRICS Is the first line memorable? Did you readily identify the song and the group? Share some memorable 1st lines from current songs. (Make sure the lyrics are appropriate.)
copy Theme “You Belong to Me “— Taylor Swift: “You're on the phone with your girlfriend, she's upset” “Brown-Eyed Girl” — Van Morrison: “Hey, where did we go/days when the rains came?” “Treasure” — Bruno Mars: ” “Gimme your, gimme your, gimme your attention, baby.” “Live Like You Were Dying” — Tim McGraw: “He said I was in my early 40's,/With a lot of life before me” “Free Bird”— Lynard Skynard: “If I leave here tomorrowwill you still remember me? “Fly Like an Eagle”— The Steve Miller Band: “Time keeps on slippin' slippin' slippin into the future.
copy Theme “Bohemian Rhapsody” — Queen: “Is this the real life? / Is this just fantasy?” “Good Vibrations” — The Beach Boys: “I, I love the colorful clothes she wears / And the way the sunlight plays upon her hair” “Friends in Low Places” — Garth Brooks: “Blame it all on my roots, I showed up in boots and ruined your black-tie affair.” “Hotel California” — The Eagles: “On a dark, desert highway/Cool wind in my hair.” “Blitzkrieg Bop” — The Ramones: "Hey, ho, let's go!" “I Knew You Were Trouble” — Taylor Swift: “Once upon a time, a few mistakes ago.”
copy Theme NOW TRY SOME SONG LYRICS Share some memorable 1st lines from current songs. (Make sure the lyrics are appropriate.)
Be specific Theme: Outside the box, Inside the box Tone: candid
Consider lists copy Theme From F. Scott Fitzgerald's story "The Crack-Up“ Seen in a Junk Yard. Dogs, chickens with few claws, brass fittings, T's elbow, rust everywhere, bales of metal 1800 lbs., plumbing fixtures, bathtubs, sinks, water pumps, wheels, Fordson tractor, acetylene lamps for tractors, sewing machine, bell on dinghy, box of bolts (No. 1), van, stove, auto stuff (No. 2), army trucks, cast iron body, hot dog stand, dinky engines, sprockets like watch parts, hinge all taken apart on building side, motorcycle radiators, George on the high army truck.
Try a list Theme: splash Tone: pride
Keep it short Theme: without Tone: inquisitive
Be a name dropper Theme: COLLECTIONS Tone: assertive
Be a name dropper Theme: bit by bit Tone: provocative
Be a name dropper Be a name dropper Theme: THINGS LEFT UNSAID Tone: thoughtful
Try 1st Person (multiple) Theme: I Go to Johnson Tone: authoritative
Try a conversation Theme: En Route Tone: conversational
Try numbers Theme: It All Adds Up Tone: reliable
Vary the length of sentences copy Theme This sentence has five words. This is five words, too. Five word sentences are fine. But several together become monotonous. Listen to what is happening. The writing is getting boring. The sound of it drones. It's like a stuck record. The ear demands some variety.
Vary the length of sentences copy Theme Now listen. I vary the sentence length and I create music. Music. The writing sings. It has a pleasant rhythm, a lilt, a harmony. I use short sentences. And I use sentences of medium length. And sometimes when I am certain the reader is rested, I will engage him with a sentence of considerable length, a sentence that burns with energy and builds with all the impetus of a crescendo, the roll of the drums, the crash of the symbols, and sounds that say listen to this; it is important. Gary Provost on the Rhythms of Sentence Length
Vary sentence length Theme: amplify Tone: animated
Use repetition copy Theme And remember the time I forgot to tell you that the dance was formal, and you showed up in jeans. I thought you'd drop me, but you didn't. Yes, there were lots of things you didn't do. But you put up with me, and you loved me, and you protected me. There were lots of things I wanted to make up to you when you returned from Vietnam. But you didn't. -Leo Buscaglia Remember the day I borrowed your brand new car, and I dented it? I thought you'd kill me, but you didn't. d remember the time I dragged you to the beach, and you said it would rain, and it did? I thought you'd say, "I told you so," but you didn't. Do you remember the time I flirted with all the guys to make you jealous and you were? I thought you'd leave me, but you didn't. Do you remember the time I spilled strawberry pie all over your car rug? I thought you'd hit me, but you didn't.
Experiment with: repetition repetition Theme: ‘bout time Tone: assertive
Experiment with: parrallel structure • Use prepositional phrases as in • "History will show that he walked away with _____with _____and with _____.” • or • "She walked down the _____through the _____ and across the _____."
Consider an embedded message Theme: unforgettable Tone:
1stperson inanimate object copy Theme (continued) Am I just a school? I am senior square at lunch. l am A-1O at test time. I am Newman Field at kickoff. I am the stage at curtain call. Am l just a school? I am six building sections A-F. I am your teacher who helped you after school.I am the step you broke your heel on at Homecoming. I am what you have made me. Am l just a school?
1stperson inanimate object copy Theme (continued) I am six feet of green separating you from a birdie. I am the three-point line at the buzzer. I am fourth and goal and no time-outs. I am a 3-2 pitch with the bases loaded. Am I just a game? I am a grandma with a giant foam finger. I am a watered-down cup of “The Thirst Quencher.” I am two skinned knees and a bruised ego. I am a double-fault at game point. Am I just a game?
1stperson inanimate object copy Theme (continued) I am a high-stepping, prime time trip to the end zone. I am Air Ball, the grim specter of basketball death. I am the inappropriate word that was worth the red card. I am “RAMS!” on the count of three. Am I just a game? Do you know the depth of defeat? Have you scaled the peaks of victory? Am I just a game? Go deep. Ace the serve. Swing for the fences Sink the long one Then you’ll know, you can tell me Am I just a game?
1stperson inanimate object copy Theme (continued) Do you remember your finest hour? Do you remember your worst? Maybe you don’t. I do. So, am I just a school? Cheer wildly. Slap on the Ram bumper sticker. Paint your faces blue. Make me proud. Then tell me, am I just a school? Well, am I, friend? Am I?
Alliteration copy Theme All last year, anytime we asked about the new ABC schedule, administrators gave us an artful answer, which left us anticipating academic agony. But when the buildings closed for summer break, believers in this new set of ABCs broke the news that we’d be battling the books for an extra hour. Built in to the new schedule was a seventh period to break the boundaries of boring academic basics. Certainly, changes loomed ahead. Contact period now came at noon instead of the close of the day, and classes commenced an hour before the rooster crowed. Clearly, we were learning a new set of ABC’s.
AWFUL THEME COPY copy Theme Our four years of high school provide many opportunities to set out in various directions. Bay High has established many programs so we may become familiar with different areas. However, we are also given other alternatives. Everyone tries at least one direction, wherever it may lead. By trying a particular direction, we are able to develop an interest which may in turn lead to another area of interest, and eventually direct us where we are destined to go. We may take part in many activities: music, athletics, jobs, clubs, school work, or just taking it easy. Many times these high school activities are group affairs, but actually we are individually pursuing our own personal interests. Most of us are not even near the end of our journey, and some of us have not yet begun. Difficulty in finding the place where we are headed should not discourage us. We will have to stop and do some serious thinking once in awhile when we have more than one path available; and we may follow only one. High school is just one of the legs in our journey to find out where we should be headed. At the end of the year, we will continue our search in other directions. Each one of us in his own way will explore the new dimensions discovered this year together. … How Often I saw Where I should be going, Only By Setting Out For Somewhere Else. INDEFINITE ADJECTIVES NOT SPECIFIC TOO PHILOSOPHICAL NO ONE WILL READ IT!
YOUR TURN copy Theme What is your theme’s tone? What voice will work with the tone? What format will you use? Brainstorm. Write a 1st draft. Read it to staff members and have them offer suggestions. Rewrite until it works.