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Child and Adolescent Sexual Development: If education is the answer, what are the questions?

Child and Adolescent Sexual Development: If education is the answer, what are the questions?. Dr. Ng Kee On Clinical Psychologist. Sex Education: The Ambivalence. A little knowledge can be a dangerous thing . The $64,000 Question . Does it work ?. Back to Basics. Why Sex Education?

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Child and Adolescent Sexual Development: If education is the answer, what are the questions?

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  1. Child and Adolescent Sexual Development:If education is the answer, what are the questions? Dr. Ng Kee On Clinical Psychologist

  2. Sex Education:The Ambivalence

  3. A little knowledge can be a dangerous thing

  4. The $64,000 Question Does it work?

  5. Back to Basics • Why Sex Education? • What it hopes to do/achieve?

  6. Current (Parochial) Practices:The “Doomsday” Approach? Prevention of: • Sexually Transmitted Diseases • Premarital Sex • Promiscuity • Sex-role Confusion • Sexual “Perversity”/ Sexual Abuse

  7. The “State” of the Art? “Adults coming into the classroom and yammering about sex, whether for or against it, just do not have impact on teens.”

  8. Are we looking in the right direction?

  9. Time for a Paradigm Shift? Threat /Danger Good & Wellness Decorative Garden Plants Popular Food

  10. Sex-Education:Opportunities for Personal Development? Threat vsOpportunity Safety Action vsCreativity Fear/Anxiety vs Interest/Optimism

  11. The “Consumer-led” Approach • What do most parents want for their child(ren)?

  12. What do Children “Want”? • Pleasure ? • Security/Stability • Meaningful (Doing things right: Self-respect & Contentment) Reference: 3 Seductive Ideas (Jerome Kagan)

  13. Beyond the “Birds & Bees” :What do we seek in Sex? • Identity & Sexuality • Affiliation & Belonging (Making & Keeping a Relationship) • Stability & Meaning: Emotional Connectedness & Contentment

  14. Putting it into Practice:What should be Included? Meaning: Love & Emotional Connectedness Inter-dependence: Making & Keeping Relationship Independence: Identity & Sexuality Biology: Basic Needs

  15. Sexuality:In simple language? • Manhood / Womanhood • Attractiveness: Physical and Personality • Intimacy: Physical (non sexual) vs Sexual

  16. Making & Keeping Relationship • Communication Skills • Social Skills (e.g. Assertiveness: e.g. how to say no) • Self-Discipline Recommended reading: When I say no, I feel guilty by M Smith

  17. Emotional Connected-ness • Empathy: Being with & Sharing (happiness & sadness) • Attentiveness & Listening • Seeking out: getting to know more of each other, exploring more agreeable/meaningful ways of enhancing the relationship (conflict management)

  18. What is listening? 聽

  19. Knowing How:How do Children Learn • Through formal teaching • Through observation & modelling • Through participation (e.g. trials and errors) and experience

  20. Knowing How:Who Shall do What? • Everyone: Basics; Optimism, Social competence • Family (Parents): Basics; Sexuality; Social Competence; Emotional Connectedness; Values/Norms • School: Basics; Discipline, Peer group & Pro-social activities

  21. Knowing How:KISS – the Behavioural Method 3 Basic steps of operations: • Be Positive • Be specific (tangible and non fuzzy) • Be small

  22. In a Nutshell:What is the Essence of Sex Education? Life Skills: • Me: My needs, My way • Thou: Your needs, Your way • Us: Our needs, Our way

  23. Any Questions?

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