A Father’s Love: A Faithful Son and Daughter

1. Lamplighter To make ready a people prepared for the Lord. Lk 1:17 A Father’s Love: A Faithful Son and Daughter

2. "This is my beloved Son, with whom I am well pleased.” Mat 3:17

3. ”You are my beloved Son, with whom I am well pleased.” Mark 1:11

4. IDENTITY—Celebrated And when Jesus was baptized, immediately he went up from the water, and behold, the heavens were opened to him, and he saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove and coming to rest on him;

5. IDENTITY Celebrated & Confirmed You are My Son! And the Holy Spirit descended on him in bodily form, like a dove; and a voice came from heaven, "You are my beloved Son; with you I am well pleased." Mark 1:11

6. IDENTITY Celebrated & Confirmed Publicly This is MY Son …like a dove and coming to rest on him; and behold, a voice from heaven said and he saw the Spirit of God descending, "This is my beloved Son,with whom I am well pleased." Matt 3:16,17 (basketball)

7. NURTURE Love This is my beloved Son You are my beloved Son Jonathan – Thanksgiving identity, nurture, affirmation, and position

8. AFFIRMATION Pleasure My beloved Son in whom I am well pleased! Patio, Landscape, Jacob Javits, Pasadena, Jaguar Jonathan - asprin For it pleased the Father that in him should all fullness dwell; Col 1:19

9. POSITION of Authority And a cloud overshadowed them, and a voice came out of the cloud, “This is My beloved son in whom I am well pleased, Listen to Him!” Mark 9:7

10. Position Affirmation Identity Nurture

11. Position of Authority Painfully Tested “Though he were a son, yet learned he obedience by the things which he suffered.” Hebrews 5 Olive Press

13. Remember though, don’t provoke your children by placing responsibility above relationships. Jonathan bed, deb and counselor bed

14. REAFFIRMATION And Jesus answered them, saying, The hour is come, that the Son of man should be glorified. Verily, verily, I say unto you, Except a corn of wheat fall into the ground and die, it abideth alone: but if it die, it bringeth forth much fruit. He that loveth his life shall lose it; and he that hateth his life in this world shall keep it unto life eternal. If any man serve me, let him follow me; and where I am, there shall also my servant be: if any man serve me, him will my Father honour. Now is my soul troubled; and what shall I say? Father, save me from this hour: but for this cause came I unto this hour. Father, glorify thy name. Then came there a voice from heaven, saying, I have both glorified it, and will glorify it again. The people therefore, that stood by, and heard it, said that it thundered: others said, An angel spake to him. Jesus answered and said, This voice came not because of me, but for your sakes.Scew driver -Asprin

15. $20 Bill Recently, the Lord gave me a wonderful opportunity to demonstrate the power of His awesome love to one of my sons. This son phoned me at the bookstore one day and said, "Guess what, mom... I found a $20 bill in my pocket." Immediately I discerned that what he was telling me probably wasn't the truth.  But I congratulated him on finding the lost money and we speculated that it was probably some forgotten birthday money.  End of phone call. When I hung up the phone with him I tried to remind myself to check in a drawer at home to see if a $20 bill was still there.  It is a drawer that the older boys know about... where my husband and I stash extra cash for emergencies.

16. That night I forgot to check, but a few days later I remembered and saw that it was missing.  My husband hadn't taken any money from it... and money had never been missing before.  I knew I had to talk to my son. What a flashback to my childhood!!My son was from my blood, for sure.  But he didn't have the desperate, driving need for money that I thought I had as a child... or did he?  I remembered the guilt and shame... and the loss of trust with my parents as I stole time and again and was caught and disciplined for it.  I remembered how it felt... how I knew I lost their trust so I didn't care after awhile... Oh, no.  I don't want my dear son feeling that way or taking that path!

17. I brought him into a quiet room away from his brothers and we sat down together.  I told him I wanted to tell him a story... and I proceeded to tell him about when I was a little girl and I had taken a $10 bill from my mother's wallet.  My mother found the money missing very shortly afterward and was distraught.  It was the only money we had for groceries that week!  I felt so terrible... and I really wanted to return the money.  But how?  I decided to make up a story to cover my sin.  I went outside to where the sprinkler was watering the lawn and I pretended to find the money under the sprinkler.  I went in the house, triumphant that I had "found" the (now wet) missing money, eager to hand it over to my distraught mother and make things right again.Much to my dismay, I was met with an angry parent who vowed that I was lying... that I had stolen the money... and that I could never be trusted.  I sank deeper into my sin, believing that I might as well be what she claimed I was.  It didn't matter anymore.

18. I knew that I wanted this encounter with my son to be very, very different.  So I told him the story while holding him in my arms and rubbing his back.  Then I let him know that I was missing $20 and I asked if it was possibly the $20 that he had found in his pocket.  He immediately said, "No, mom... I did find that in my pocket."I was so pleased that God was in control!!!  It was at this point that I got the awesome opportunity to heal a great wrong in my life... simply by treating my son (in his sin) the way that I had only dreamed of being treated.I said to him, "I BELIEVE you."

19. I hugged him and sent him on his way.Later that night I mentioned to him that we needed to put the $20 up on his "chart."  We keep a running account of the younger children's money on a chart on the refrigerator.  Then we keep the cash for them so they don't lose it. I had joyfully written the $20 entry on his account.  I felt such peace... such joy.  Conviction of sin was up to the Holy Spirit alone!!  I had done the only job required of me... I had lavished "prodigal" grace on my son.

20. I call it prodigal grace because prodigal means "reckless, lavish, wasteful."  The father in the parable of the "prodigal son" was actually the one who was reckless, lavish, and wasteful!!  He "wasted" the fatted calf on his wayward son; he "lavished" an undeserved gift of a robe and a ring.  He recklessly ran down the road to meet him.  He poured out unconditional love.  Yes -- that is what I lacked as a child.  That is what I wanted my son, yet in his unrepentant sin, to experience.A few hours later I was preparing to read aloud a book to the boys.  My heartbroken son came into the room and burst into tears at my side.  I hugged him.  I asked him if he would like to tell me something."Yes...", he stammered, "I.... I did take that money out of your drawer, Mom."

21. What joy in my heart to see the Holy Spirit bring about the work of repentance totally unhindered by me!!!I said this to him...”Oh, my dear son... I LOVE you.  I am so proud of you for telling me the truth.  That took SO much courage.  I believed you when you told me that you didn't take the money because I really trust you.  I'm so glad I can trust you to tell me the truth.  I know that was a hard thing to do.I do want you to know something.  All that I have is yours.  If you ever feel like you need money you just come and tell me.  I don't ever want you to feel like you have to steal.And I want you to keep that money... I don't want it back.  I'm just so glad you let the Holy Spirit work in your heart."Yes... I wanted him to keep the money.  And no one else in our household knows what happened.  I covered over his sin for a very good purpose --- so that he will never forget what that kind of love feels like.I don't believe I'll ever deal with this issue with him again.  And for that very reason... it was worth it to be a prodigal mom.

22. 7 Principles of Biblical Manhood Will to Obey Work to Do Woman to Love Reject passivity Accept responsibility Leads courageously Expect the greater reward

23. IDENTITY—Tested Then Jesus was led up by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil. And after fasting forty days and forty nights, he was hungry. And the tempter came and said to him, "If you are the Son of God, command these stones to become loaves of bread." But he answered, "It is written, "'Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God.'" Then the devil took him to the holy city and set him on the pinnacle of the temple and said to him, "If you are the Son of God, throw yourself down, for it is written, "'He will command his angels concerning you,' and "'On their hands they will bear you up, lest you strike your foot against a stone.'" Jesus said to him, "Again it is written, 'You shall not put the Lord your God to the test.'" Again, the devil took him to a very high mountain and showed him all the kingdoms of the world and their glory. And he said to him, "All these I will give you, if you will fall down and worship me." Then Jesus said to him, "Be gone, Satan! For it is written, "'You shall worship the Lord your God and him only shall you serve.'" Then the devil left him, and behold, angels came and were ministering to him. Matt 4

24. Nurture and Affirmation—Tested After fasting for forty days, Jesus was faced with a three-pronged temptation by Satan. This temptation encompassed the same temptations we encounter daily: the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life. Jesus’ inaugural entrance into ministry teaches us that if we want to enjoy the feast, we must first endure the fast. If we want to be effective, we must first be tested. After receiving verbal confirmation from His Father, (“This is/You are my beloved Son,”) Jesus encountered the opposite of what might be expected. The crowds were ready to hear him and the timing seemed right, but his Father knew that “suffering produces endurance, and endurance produce character, and character produces hope and hope makes us not ashamed because God’s love has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit given to us.” Romans 5 For even Christ pleased not himself; Rom 15:3 Then said he, Lo, I come to do thy will, O God. Heb 10:9

25. And Jesus answered them, saying, The hour is come, that the Son of man should be glorified. Verily, verily, I say unto you, Except a corn of wheat fall into the ground and die, it abideth alone: but if it die, it bringeth forth much fruit. He that loveth his life shall lose it; and he that hateth his life in this world shall keep it unto life eternal. If any man serve me, let him follow me; and where I am, there shall also my servant be: if any man serve me, him will my Father honour. Now is my soul troubled; and what shall I say? Father, save me from this hour: but for this cause came I unto this hour. Father, glorify thy name. Then came there a voice from heaven, saying, I have both glorified it, and will glorify it again. The people therefore, that stood by, and heard it, said that it thundered: others said, An angel spake to him. Jesus answered and said, This voice came not because of me, but for your sakes.

26. Psalms 1 & 2 Blessed (yrwa) is the man who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly, nor stand in the way of sinners, nor sit in the seat of the scornful. (1:1) But his delight is in the Law/Word/Instruction of the LORD, and on His Word he meditates day and night; and everything he does, he prospers. (1:2,3) “You are my Son; today I have begotten you.” Kiss the Son, lest he be angry (2:7,12) Blessed are all who take refuge in him. (2:12)

27. Ps. 117 Praise the Lord (v 1, first) Praise the Lord (v 2, last) Ps. 118 Oh give thanks to the LORD, for his is good; for his loyal love endures forever! (v 1, first) Oh give thanks to the LORD, for his is good; for his loyal love endures forever! (v 29, last) Ps. 119 Ps. 120 -134 Ps. 135 Praise the Lord (v 1, first) Praise the Lord (v 2, last) Ps. 136 Oh give thanks to the LORD, for his is good; for his loyal love endures forever! (v 1, first) Oh give thanks to the God of heaven, for his loyal love endures forever! (v 26, last)

28. Ps. 117 Praise the Lord (v 1, first) Praise the Lord (v 2, last) Ps. 118 Oh give thanks to the LORD, for his is good; for his loyal love endures forever! (v 1, first) Oh give thanks to the LORD, for his is good; for his loyal love endures forever! (v 29, last) Ps. 119 Word of God! 172 x’s! Ps. 120 -134 Ascend to the Presence of God Ps. 135 Praise the Lord (v 1, first) Praise the Lord (v 2, last) Ps. 136 Oh give thanks to the LORD, for his is good; for his loyal love endures forever! (v 1, first) Oh give thanks to the God of heaven, for his loyal love endures forever! (v 26, last)

29. In that same hour he rejoiced in the Holy Spirit and said, "I thank you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, that you have hidden these things from the wise and understanding and revealed them to little children; yes, Father, for such was your gracious will. Luke 10:21

30. Health and innocence are the true sources of enjoyment; but those who have had the misfortune to accustom themselves to violent pleasures, lose all taste for those of a more moderate nature, and fatigue themselves in a restless pursuit, seeking after excessive gratifications.

31. In this state of frivolity, if a child gives himself up to idleness, which is the vacancy of the soul, exhausts himself into a state of weariness. These children often accustom themselves to sleep one-third more than is necessary for the preservation of health. This indulgence serves only weaken, to undermine their constitution, and expose them to bodily infirmities, whereas a moderate degree of sleep, accompanied with regular exercise, exhilarates and renders the human frame vigorous and robust; which makes the true perfection of the body, without mentioning the vast advantage which the mind draws from it.

32. Suffer them to walk about a little; permit them even now and then, some digression, or some play, that will unbend their minds; then bring them back gently to the task. Too much regularity in exacting from then an uninterrupted application to study, hurts them too much; those who govern often affect this regularity in exacting from them, because it is more convenient to themselves, than subjecting themselves continually to the proper moments of instruction.

33. Let us here remark a great defect in the common modes of education. We put all the pleasure on one side, and all the weariness on the other. The weariness on that study and responsibility, the pleasure on that of diversion. What can a child do, but impatiently support the drudgery of learning and working, and run ardently after play? Let us then endeavor to change this order; let us render study pleasing; let us conceal the trouble under the appearance of liberty and delight. Let us suffer the children to interrupt their study by little sallies of diversion; these distractions are necessary, and ought therefore to be allowed, purposely to refresh their minds, that are so easily fatigued even by a short application.

34. I must, however, repeat that it is necessary to guard against making it a law for them to hear, or much less to make them regular lessons. Pleasure of itself must do the business; for true education emerges from the bowels of pleasure and a love for learning. Do not press them; you will obtain your end even with the slowest capacities; avoid over charging their memory, and their curiosity will increase with age.

35. Take good care never to threaten them with any thing to study, nor to subject them to many rules. We should make as few rules as possible, unless they cannot be avoided, endeavoring to bring it about quietly, without forceful necessity; (5 yr old bike) we should always show some sufficient reasoning for doing the task at this time. We run the risk of discouraging children, if we never praise them when they do well. Though praises are to be feared on account of vanity, still we must endeavor to make use of them to encourage children, without flattering them. Well timed praise may be profitably used as a stimulus to industry, but not as an incitement to intoxicating self-esteem.

36. Dear Dad: It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you. I have been finding real connection with Stacy and she is so nice. But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercings', and the fact that she is much older than I am. She really is perfect for me and she told me that she would like to start a family right away. Don't worry Dad. I'm 15 and I ready to take on this responsibility. Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know your grandchildren.                                 Love, Your Son, James

37. PS. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over  at Tommy's house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the report card, that's in my center desk drawer. I love you. Call me when it's safe to come home. Perspective

38. "If  a child learns a trade, or is highly educated for a lucrative profession, all is nothing compared to the art of detachment from riches; if you want to make your child rich, teach him this. he is truly rich who does not desire great possessions, or surrounds himself with wealth, but who requires nothing…Don't worry about giving him an influential reputation, for worldly wisdom, but ponder deeply how you can teach him to think lightly of this life's passing glories, thus he will become truly renowned and glorious…Don't strive to make him a clever orator, but teach him to love true wisdom. He will suffer if he lacks clever words, but if he lacks wisdom, all the rhetoric in the world can't help him. A pattern of life is what is needed, not empty speeches; character, not cleverness; deeds, not words. These things will secure the kingdom of God and bestow God's blessings.”[1] Shoes; Loan for car;

39. Above all things, do not let it appear to the child that you demand from him unnecessary submissions; Jesus’s prayer in the Garden

40. Position of Authority • Painfully Tested • Abraham – sacrifice your son…your only son! • Jacob—let me go! • Moses—blamed for everything. • David—watch the sheep; lion, bear, writer of Scripture, musician & marksman, annointed! (Tale of Three Kings) • Jeremiah—why am I in this pit? Lam 3 • 1st Peter 5 – “after you suffer awhile, make you perfect, stablish, strengthen, settle you. • 2nd Peter 1:1 Peter, a servant and apostle—identity then position. • Affirmation – tunnel - Responsibility, Work, Position 3 generations! • 7 principles of Biblical manhood • But be careful how you assign these painful experiences - Fenelon

41. … it is necessary to find out every means of making those things pleasing to the child which are expected of him; and should you have any thing distressing or difficult to propose, forget not to comfort him with the assurance that a little trouble will be followed by unspeakable satisfaction.

42. You should always give to children a solid and agreeable end, that may captivate their young heart, and sweeten their exertions; We should always encourage them in their work, and never pretend to subject them by a dry and absolute authority. Never place responsibility above relationship! Deb Bed, Die for mom, shoes

43. Jacob was unable to assume his place of responsibility because he lacked identity, nurture, affirmation, and position of authority