Public Speaking, Negotiation, Etiquette

1. Public Speaking, Negotiation, Etiquette Tatevik Khachatryan AUNA Head of Youth Division

2. Public Speaking

3. What is public speaking? • Why do we need it? • What are the goals? • How to talk? • Examples of good orators

6. Analysis of the speech 5 W Questions Who? What? When? Where? Why? How?

7. Tips for a good speech • Get well-prepared, be familiar with the topic • Preparation, preparation and preparation • Imagine yourself speaking • Do not apologize when making mistakes • Avoid slang and informal language • Diplomatic alphabet • Practice a lot…

8. Body language, gestures, • Pay attention to words, • Formulate the questions properly, • Speak CONCISELY, • Ensure the dialogue, • Confidence, excitement, commitment • Eye contact • Humor (limited)

9. Speak, DO NOT read

10. Listening as a part of speaking

11. Let the butterflies fly…. Share your practice of overcoming your fears

12. Overcoming the fears • Be focused • Practice a lot and listen to the others practicing • Be well-prepared • Take only the positive ideas to the stage • Your fears are not visible to the audience • Humor helps

13. Prior to the speech

14. Negotiation

15. 7 Element Principle Interests, not positions Options (the more, the better) BATNA Legitimacy Commitments for the future Communication Relationship

16. Negotiation Modes • Competing • Accommodating • Avoiding • Collaborating • Compromising Principled Negotiator

17. “Negotiation is the communication designed to reach agreement when you and the other side have some interests that are shared and others that are opposed.” • Hard vs Soft vs Principled Negotiation • Distributive (pie fixed, win-lose) vs. Integrative Negotiation

18. Don’t Bargain Over Positions • Problem of haggling (Customer vs. Shopkeeper) • Unwise • Digging deeper into positions – impossible to change • Interest of saving face • Ground for compromise • Inefficient • Extreme opening positions, small concessions – drags on • Endangers relationship • Contest of rigid will • Being nice not the answer • Soft-soft – sloppy agreement (O’Henry) • Soft-hard – you lose your shirt

19. The Alternative • Negotiation: on substance vs on process (a game about a game) • Your moves decide the flow of the game • Four points: • People: Separate the people from the problem. • Interests: Focus on interests, not positions. • Options: Generate a variety of possibilities before deciding what to do. • Criteria: Insist that the result be based on some objective standard.

20. Focus on Interests, not Positions • Reconcile interests, not positions (collaboration vs compromise) • Interests define positions • Several positions can satisfy the same interest • Agreements often possible because of difference in interests • Ask why and why not – be clear that you’re not asking for justifications • Negotiators have multiple interests • Substance and relationship • Affecting and effecting • Constituencies • Show you appreciate their interests, present your interests, build common ground – present problem before conclusion • Be hard on the people, soft of on the problem

21. Invent Options for Mutual Gain • Orange; Arm Wrestling • Diagnosis: • Premature judgment; Searching for the single answer; Assumption of fixed pie; Thinking that “Solving their problem is their problem” • Prescription: • Separate inventing from deciding; Broaden your options; Look for mutual gain; Make their decision easy

22. Dealing With People Problems • Perception • Conflict lies in people’s heads • Self-selective perceptions – reinforcing what you think • Put yourself in their shoes – discuss perspectives openly • Get them involved: process is product • Consider face-saving • Emotion • Understand their emotions, make yours explicit • Allow the other side to let off steam • Communication • Show you understand, then be understood • Don’t persuade third parties; two judges over case (not adversarial); two shipwrecked sailors

23. Insist on Using Objective Criteria • Deciding on the basis of will is costly • Objective criteria, independent of each side’s will • Criteria should apply reciprocally • Developing objective criteria • Fair standards • Fair procedures • Joint search • Reason and be open to reason • Never yield to pressure, only principle

24. BATNA • Bottom line vs. BATNA • Too rigid; More than one variable; Too high • BATNA is an alternative course of action • The reason you negotiate to produce something better than the results you can obtain without negotiating. • Have a trip wire • The better your BATNA, the greater your power • Pot seller vs. wealth tourist

25. Developing Your BATNA • Three steps: • List of actions if no agreement • Improving promising ones, converting into alternatives • Selecting best option • Disclosing your BATNA • Consider their BATNA • Lower overestimations • Change their BATNA

26. Dirty Tactics: Deliberate Deception Recognize tactic; voice it; question legitimacy • Deliberate Deception • Phony facts • Ambiguous authority • Dubious intentions • Refusal to negotiate • Extreme demands • Escalating demands • Lock-in tactics • Hardheaded partner • A calculated delay • Take it or leave it

27. Negotiation Jujitsu • Don’t attack position; look behind it • What are the interests? • What principles underlie it? • Don’t defend your ideas; invite criticism and advice • Examine negative judgments • Turn situation around • Recast an attack on you as an attack on the problem • Ask questions and pause • Statements generate resistance, whereas questions generate answers. • Use silence

28. Practice…

29. Thank You Tatevik Khachatryan AUNA Head of Youth Division