Lesson 11 - Parenting

1. Lesson 11 - Parenting Robert Wonser

2. Parenting Parenting is the process of nurturing, caring for, socializing, and preparing one's children for their eventual adult roles.

3. Socialization Socialization is the process by which people learn characteristics of their group’s norms, values, attitudes, and behaviors. From the first moments of life, children begin a process of socialization wherein parents, family, and friends establish an infant’s social construction of reality which is what people define as real because of their background assumptions and life experiences with others.

4. An average U.S. child’s social construction of reality includes knowledge that he or she belongs, can depend on others to meet their needs, and has privileges and obligations that accompany membership in their family and community. Primary socialization includes all the ways the newborn is molded into a social being, capable oaf interacting in and meeting the expectations of society. Most primary socialization is facilitated by the family, friends, school, and various forms of media.

5. Social Class and Parenting • Annette Lareau’s ‘Unequal Childhoods’ • Concerted cultivation vsaccomplishment of natural growth • What are the different outcomes? • Notice how one’s position in society affects how one rears children.

6. Childhood Dependence Individuation is the process of separating oneself, one’s identity, and one’s dependence on others, especially on parents.

7. Children's Independence and Their Ability to Nurture Others Over Certain Life Course Stages

8. The trick is to find a balance between control and freedom The model on the next slide leads to an ideal outcome of having raised children who are independent co-adults.

9. An Ideal Parenting Approach for the First 20 Years of Life Enmeshment between parents and children occurs when they weave their identities so tightly around one another that it renders them both incapable of functioning independently.

10. Behaviorism and the Cognitive Model Behaviorism is a theory of learning that simply states that children will repeat behaviors that they perceive to bring a desired reward while ceasing behaviors that they perceive bring punishments. Cognitive model of parenting is an approach that applies reason and clarification to the child in a persuasive effort to get them to understand why they should behave a certain way.

11. Examples of Rewards and Punishments for Children

12. Types of Parenting Rescue parents are constantly interfering with their children’s activities Dominating Parents over control and coerce their children. Mentoring Parents tend to negotiate and share control with their children.

13. Co-Adulthood Co-adulthood is the status children attain when they are independent, capable of fulfilling responsibilities and roles, and confident in their own identities as emerging adults.

14. Infant Mortality (IM) and Life Expectancy (LE), 2007

15. How active is your young child? 18 month old Alyssa 24 hours 4,652 separate activities 221 behavioral categories Watches/looks at something 643 Manipulates an object 96 Cries 62 Screams 17 Sings 22 Falls down 9 Walks 299

16. Preschoolers Practice gross and fine motor skills move and investigate their world pour milk age-appropriate Limits Chores Trash Clean room Change sheets Sweep Vacuum Dishwasher Fold laundry Feed pets Yard work Clean bathrooms 16

17. Parents Parent Differently Most mothers spend more time in childcare and housework activities than fathers In less than 15% of married-couple families do the father and mother share equally in HW and CC Mothers take care Fathers play In less than 2% of married-couple families are the fathers the full-time homemaker 17

18. Parenting Styles Authoritative/Democratic Style Authoritarian Style Permissive Style Rejecting Style Uninvolved Style 18

19. Parental Alliance Respect each others’ differences Parents are a parenting alliance -- present united front to children Marital conflict can affect parenting alliance 19

20. Effects of Life Stress Stress decreases ability to: Be patient or relax Meet children’s needs Be emotionally responsive Show affection Give praise 20

21. Effects of Life Stress Stress increases tendency to: Be strict and criticize Punish and spank Sources of stress? Coping strategies? 21

22. Children Affect Parenting Some children’s needs are more difficult to meet What works for one child may not work for another Some children have special needs 22

23. Effective Discipline Purpose of discipline learn self-control develop conscience Children respond best in the context of loving, trusting relationship 23

24. Effective Discipline Consistent Positive (rewards) rather than negative (punishments) Catch them being good Behavioral expectations clear Developmentally appropriate Severe punishment is counterproductive 24

25. Conscious Parenting How children are socialized if often not thought about consciously. What types of things are we likely to reproduce in our children if we don’t actively focus on what we do? Examples Cinderella ate my daughter! Troublesome aspects of masculinity

26. Looking for quality childcare Do the kids look happy? Is there a “good feeling” there? Licensed Adequate space for indoor and outdoor play Is food appetizing? Staff training and adequate number TV/video games Activity plan 26

27. 27 Your neighbor has a child with special needs, what theory could you use to help understand the challenges of this family?