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Resilience: What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. Mary Markowski Scarborough High School. What is Resilience?. The capacity to respond and recover when life hits you upside the head Ability to handle stress and setbacks in life
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Resilience:What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger Mary Markowski Scarborough High School
What is Resilience? • The capacity to respond and recover when life hits you upside the head • Ability to handle stress and setbacks in life • There are 5 steps that each of us can learn to be resilient! • First, let’s see how resilient you already are!
How Resilient Are You? True or False Quiz • If I have a disagreement with a close family or friend, it leaves me upset for hours. • If another drivers cuts me off in traffic, I can’t stop fuming about it. • If I make a mistake at school or work, I have trouble skaing it off. • If I was not accepted for a job I really wanted or I school I really wanted to get into, it would make me feel down about my whole future. • At a party, if I’m talking with a new person that I’m really interested in and then I get tongue-tied, I replay the moment over and over in my head for a days afterward.
Count up the number of times you said “true” • More than 3 “true”s: • You may have a hard time snapping back from setbacks….you could use some of these pointers on the next few slides • 2 or less “true”s: • Nice work! You have excellent coping skills.
5 secrets to Resilience • Choose to be a survivor • View setbacks and temporary • Think out of the “Oh-No!” box • Take care of Yourself • Don’t go it alone
1. Choose to be a survivor • It’s easy to freak out but resilient people don’t let themselves • Avoid catastrophic thinking and avoid “negative self talk” • Be your own hero and remember that YOU control your life and can take action • TAKE the INITIATIVE for your life! • We can’t always control what happens to us, but we ALWAYS control our attitude and reactions
2. View Setbacks as Temporary • The Most resilient people believe that they actions they take can and do affect change. • They do not take losses personally • They realize a setback can be a challenge and an opportunity • When things go wrong, look to people, books, past experiences, to help you take action • Remember that you have control over your emotions and things will get better
3. Think out of the oh-no box • An unexpected crisis causes most of us to freeze with fear but flexibility is a key characteristic of resilience • Train yourself to ask these questions: • What other things might have contributed to the problem? • If I shared this issue with my friend, what would s/he see as having caused it? • What parts of the problem can I directly control? • What solutions have I not tried? • These questions help you form “insight” to problems
4. Take care ofyourself • Physical health is necessary for resilience! • Eat well and exercise • Avoid mood changers like alcohol and marijuana • Practice relaxation breathing to calm yourself down during tough times
5. Don’t go it alone • The more you hide your problem, the more power it has over you • Reach out to those you love • Build your connections to different groups: school, family, work friends, neighbors, etc • Being interconnected gives us the strength to handle challenges by helping us develop a sense of belonging and purpose!
Final thoughts on resiliency • Remember how strong you are to have gotten this far in life • Keep calm and “carry on” • Remember “this too, shall pass!” • Take care of yourself • Reach out to others
Self Reflection • Think of a time that you have shown resilience in your life • Think of the 5 secrets of resilience • Choose to be a survivor • View setbacks and temporary • Think out of the “Oh-No!” box • Take care of Yourself • Don’t go it alone • Journal briefly about when in your life you have done some/all of these 5 things