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1. Webinar Middle leadership skills – managing difficult conversations Helen Morgan Download this presentation from oego.co/webinaoego-diffconvers

2. Managing difficult conversations In this webinar, you will develop your understanding of: • what makes some conversations difficult and why it is essential to have them • the practicalities of having a challenging conversation • strategies and approaches to managing difficult conversations • how to manage your own feelings and those of others.

3. Reflections Think about any difficult conversations you have had. • What were they about? • What made them difficult? • What did you learn?

4. Why are some conversations difficult?

5. Framing the conversation

6. Practicalities: when and where? • Arrange the meeting sooner rather than later; if there is a problem, it is better to deal with it quickly and efficiently. • Try to arrange the meeting in a place that is private and where you and your colleague won’t be interrupted. Book a meeting room if possible as it is neutral. • Avoid sitting behind a desk and creating an automatic barrier and an immediate sense of hierarchy. • Arrange the meeting at the end of the day or after school so that your colleague can leave the meeting and reflect on the conversation. • Let your colleague know what the meeting is about beforehand so that they don’t arrive ‘cold.’

7. How to open the conversation • Use the KISS technique to open the meeting (Keep It Short and Simple). It is important that your colleague understands the reason for the meeting. • Keep the introduction short (e.g. 2/3 minutes). • Thank your colleague for meeting with you; it is essential to show respect and remain professional at all times. • Briefly explain: • why you are meeting now • what has led to the current situation • the impact of the situation • Use clear and straightforward language so that there is no ambiguity e.g. ‘We are here to discuss the frequency and quality of your marking.’

8. Truman Capote ‘A conversation is a dialogue not a monologue.’

9. How to invite discussion • After you have explained why the meeting is taking place and described the issues, it is important to invite discussion with your colleague. • Avoid ‘why’ questions as they can be confrontational and close the discussion down. It is crucial to focus on the future and moving forward. Potential questions • Tell me how you see the current situation. • Have I got the full picture? • Are there any other reasons for this? • What are the ways forward? • Is there anything that would prevent this? • What do you want to happen? • Is it realistic? • How can I help or support you?

10. Closing the conversation • Close the conversation by: • thanking your colleague for listening and their contribution • summarising clearly what has been agreed and the way forward.

11. Dealing with difficulty?

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