Why You’re Stuck – With Derek Doepker

1. DEREK DOEPKER

2. Derek is the author of multiple number one bestselling books, including Why You're Stuck and 50 Fitness Tips You Wish You Knew. In 2012, he founded the blog, Excuse Proof Fitness to help people who are busy, broke, or unmotivated, find simple solutions to any of their challenges. Derek is passionate about empowering people to discover solutions to their own challenges by using simple tricks to unlock the brain's creative problem-solving ability. He spent years studying the world's top psychologists and personal development experts to piece together the most powerful and practical tools for transforming anyone's life.

4. So, he thinks one of the big accomplishments that he had early on was he’s actually a musician and a guitar player. So when he was twelve years old, he got into playing guitar and that was one of the early winds that he had, was he got really good at it and it taught him that he could put his mind into something, practice, be horrible at it when he first get into it, but actually really develop his skills and that taught him a lot about the growth mindset. And so he got his degree in music, graduated with honors from Belmont University and that was one of his big accomplishments was getting his music degree and a lot of the experiences he got there.

5. Another big accomplishment that he had that he's really proud of would be publishing books and some books that have become number one best-sellers at this point. And that's not something he would have ever expected himself to do or pull off. If you would of asked him five years ago, if he could of even done something like that, he doesn't think that was even possible. So going through that journey and doing that.

7. And then through that, he thinks one thing now that he wakes up each day and he's so grateful for as he thinks about it is that he basically has a lifestyle where he's managed to achieve a certain degree of financial freedom where he can wake up and he can do what he loves for a living. Because he knows just thinking back to the times in his life where he was working at a job and not that he had the worst jobs in the world, but there's just something that's kind of unfulfilling when he knew that he had more potential and talent.

8. He had something to offer the world and he wasn't really able to share that with people because he was kind of stuck in these jobs. So now that he gets to wake up and have the freedom to do what he wants and really hopefully help people and help transform their lives in the way that his life has been transformed from some of the coaches and the mentors that he had. That's he thinks really the ultimate highlight for him and his life right now.

10. One of the things he guess, another point of accomplishment is with his health and fitness. Back when he was 18 years old, probably about 17, 18 obviously still in high school, and up to that point actually with his health habits, he was eating fast food every single night. He can still remember his Mom trying to like make him a healthy meal and used to have to go to McDonald's or something.

11. He wasn't overweight necessarily, but he just, terrible shape and in terms of his performance at gym class and stuff like that so it happened where he read a book that opened his mind, expanded his awareness about the consequences that the different foods and his lifestyle choice was having on him. It was through that kind of started me on this journey of health and fitness which would later tie in to a lot of the other things he learned about psychology and motivation and personal development. And so at the age of 18, he went and he got into the gym, he was working out, multiple times a week, completely transformed his diet and got in, great shape and he kept that up for the past ten years of his life.

12. So what that showed him was that he wasn't really stuck with this identity that he had or with his habits. He could go from hating something, hating exercise, hating healthy food, and he learned that there's simple things that he could do and reframing things and working with his psychology to actually embrace those things and love them and make it a part of his lifestyle. And when he saw that was possible just in that one area of life, health and fitness, then it started getting him to think, can he do this with other areas of his life, with his social skills, with just developing the habit of being happier, or all these other things.

13. As well as if he can transform herself like that, would it be possible to teach other people how to do the same? So that's been kind of the journey. He's 28 years old now, so it's been about ten years of really digging deep into understanding how that transformation took place in myself. So that he could duplicate it in other areas in his life and being able to share those insights with other people, so they can have their own break through transformations.

15. The book is called The Wrinkle Cure by Nicholas Perricone. So kind of an interesting book to read at 18 years old. And he doesn't remember exactly how he first heard about it, but it gave a lot of the science behind it. And he guess he's a little bit more of an objective scientific person. So reading about that really opened his mind to this idea and this is an important concept that it's not about the consequences that are going to happen to him when he's 80 years old, if he eats a poor diet.

16. It's realizing that his lack of energy, the fatigue that he was feeling, a lot of things that he was going through at that moment in time were a direct consequence of his diet. It made him realize that he didn't necessarily have 30 years that he could just keep eating how he was eating before it would catch up with him. He was doing damage to his body, right at that moment. Every time he chose to just indulge in terribly unhealthy foods. So that was the book and that's one of the big shifts that took place for me.

19. So in terms of social skills, he thinks, if there's one book he can recommend it would be “How to Win Friends and Influence People”. So he think the first keyword there is even skill. And skill is something that can be developed. So before anything, any change took place in hsi life or if it was with his diet or his social skills, it took having a growth mindset. The realization that he's not stuck at his current level. He can always practice these things. He can always learn new skills, work on it and get better.

20. Because if a person doesn't believe they can get better, if they believe, "Well, I'm just I'm the way I am, nothing I could do about it," then, no change can take place from that mindset. So first of all, realizing, "Okay I can read this book, it's going to share tips and advice with me."

23. And one of the things that helped him, let's say with that book is because he is very much an introvert. He embraces it. He loves that quality about him. But he's not one to necessarily talk about trivial things and he didn't appreciate it. And so reading that book taught him to appreciate, things like, taking an interest in other people, being more interested in them versus trying to get other people interested in him, the value of small talk and why we engage in small talk and how you can use that to lead to something else.

24. So he had to understand it. He had to appreciate it and then in terms of the practical application, it was really just a matter of shooting for really small targets when it comes to developing these things.

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