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Marriage and the Bible. Based on the Living in Love Series by Richard L. Strauss, Biblical Studies Foundation - 1998. Right Moves, Wrong Motives. Chapter 4: Jacob and Rachel. Ground Rules. Accurately simulate your spouse’s reaction to what you say before you say it.
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Marriage and the Bible Based on the Living in Love Series by Richard L. Strauss, Biblical Studies Foundation - 1998
Right Moves, Wrong Motives Chapter 4: Jacob and Rachel
Ground Rules • Accurately simulate your spouse’s reaction to what you say before you say it. • Use this series as an opportunity for self-evaluation first. This is not an inventory of everything your spouse is doing wrong. • Be prepared to talk through the functioning of your marriage with God, your spouse, and godly counsel if needed.
Recap So Far… • Adam and Eve had a perfect marriage in the garden, marred by sin, regained by us through Jesus Christ. • The Bible is clear about the functional structure of a godly marriage. • Your spouse is your highest earthly relational priority.
One Player = Always Faithful • Genesis 28:10-20 • God repeats the covenant promise to Jacob • Jacob will be the father of a great nation • God will provide Jacob with everything he needs • Jacob Reciprocates • “then The LORD will be my God” (v.21) • Is it possible for Jacob to have a strong relationship with God, but not his (future) wife?
Lust…er…Love at First Sight • Genesis 29:1-13 • Jacob finds the land and family of his mother’s brother • A well is apparently a popular place to find a spouse • What do you discern about Jacob’s opinion of Rachel’s looks based on his actions?
Superficial Appreciation • Genesis 29:17 • What attributes are we given of Leah and Rachel? • How long did Jacob know Rachel before he declared his love for her and agreed to work seven years of unpaid labor to get her? • What is your evaluation of Jacob’s appreciation for Rachel before and after his years of service? • Genesis 29:21 – Probably not Hallmark material.
The ‘Ol Switcharoo • Laban “unloads” his eldest daughter on Jacob, probably greedy for more free labor. • Jacob = Not Happy • Where do you think Leah’s heart is in all this? • In comparison to his father, what is ironic about what just happened to Jacob?
All is Made Right, Right? • By Genesis 29:28-30, everything is a-okay, right? • What do you see of Leah’s marital experience in verses 31-34? • What is significant about verse 35? • Jacob’s preferences aside, God’s promise clearly seems to rest on his marriage to Leah.
Rachel’s Chance to Shine… • Not an idyllic marriage (Genesis 30) • Rachel is barren. • Rachel is jealous. • Rachel gives an ultimatum. • Jacob becomes angry with Rachel. • Rachel repeats Jacob’s grandmother’s mistakes. • What appears to be Rachel’s motivation as she names her sons?
Monogamy Affirmed! • God’s Plan = 1 man + 1 woman • Competition in childbirth spirals both Rachel and Leah into a destructive and “short-circuited” pursuit to furnish Jacob with sons. • Jacob seems plenty willing to go along with the plan’s twists and turns.
How to Tell You’ve Hit Bottom • Genesis 30:14-22 • Rachel continues to show superficial qualities • We’re fighting over “love apples?” • Jacob steps in and straightens…what? Never mind. He’s “hired out” … for love apples! • Although mandrakes were thought to open the womb, God is THE provider. • “God listened.” “God remembered.” What do you make of God’s blessing in the midst of all this?
A Little More Dysfunction • Laban deals shrewdly with Jacob, but Jacob ends up with abundant, strong livestock. • Rachel steals her father’s idols, presumably to secure a greater inheritance for her family. • Jacob lies to Laban about running away. • Rachel lies to her father about stealing his idols.
A Discontent’s End • Genesis 31:32 • Jacob pronounces death to anyone possessing Laban’s gods. • Genesis 35 • Rachel names her prior child Joseph “May The LORD add to me another son.” • 30:1 “Give me children, or I’ll die!” • Indeed, Rachel dies in childbirth delivering Benjamin.
A Discontent’s End • Rachel is buried along the side of the road, alone. • Jacob mourns for her, through genuine love, but is ultimately buried with his family and wife Leah. (Genesis 49:29-31)
Application • Do you get a Ferrari by combining the engine of an Edsel and the body of a Pinto? • Marriages do not necessarily make husbands and wives great. Not understanding or dealing with each other’s strengths and weaknesses adds to the burden of a successful relationship.
Application • Discontentment and dissatisfaction are sins and the root of still more sins. • Are either prevalent or evident in your life? • Do you harbor discontentment toward your spouse? • Do you show contentment toward your spouse?
Application • Contentment is an INPUT, not an OUTPUT • 1 Timothy 6:6-9 • Philippians 4:11 • How do you do that? • Psalm 107:8-9
Challenge • Make a choice today to seek prayerful time with God to reveal areas of discontentment in your life. (Many of them are going to be hiding in plain sight!) • Make a choice to cast your discontentment at Jesus’ feet, repenting of your sin and thanking Him for what you DO have. • Show your spouse the fruits of CONTENTMENT