African American Faith Based Bereavement Initiative

1. African American Faith Based Bereavement Initiative

2. Lack of knowledge about the grief process—age old wisdom Psalm 34:18 The Lord is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; .

3. Reflections on Personal Experiences with Grief • What have been your own personal experiences with death, loss and grief? • Whom did you lose? • How old were you? • What were the circumstances? • Did your reaction differ based on whom you lost? • Did your reaction differ based on how old you were and what stage of life?

4. Reflections on Personal Experiences with Grief • Thinking about these reactions: • How long did you experience severe distress? • How long have you felt upset or depressed about the loss? • How often do you think about the loss now and how do you feel about it? • What helped you cope with losses in your life? • When you hear about another person’s loss, does it remind you of your losses? In what ways?

5. Reflections on Personal Experiences with Grief • When you were grieving, what kinds of things that other people did made it easier or more bearable for you? What things were not helpful? • Now think about how you react to others when they have had a loss. How does your experience affect what you say and do? Do you assume that their experience is the same as yours? Do you wish that they did not keep sharing their pain with you, because it reawakens your own pain?

6. What is grief? • Grief is the emotional response to one's loss. • Grief is a natural response to a felt loss; our way of repairing emotional damage. • Grief is individual. • Grief consists of a variety of normal responses that seem to fluctuate like an emotional roller coaster ride. • Grief is very often expressed differently by men and women. • Emotional response is expressed differently for various cultural & ethnic groups as well.

7. What do we mean when we talk about the grief process? • Models of tasks of that families have to face • Ideas about the journey of feelings they experience

8. Accepting the reality of the loss. Experiencing the pain of grief. Adjusting to an environment without the baby. Moving on, withdrawing emotional energy and reinvesting. William Worden (2001) Grief: The Major Stages/Tasks Source: Health Care Professionals’ Guide to Bereavement Support; NSIDSPSC

9. A Journey of Feelings John Bowlby’s Ebb and Flow Grief Model

10. Failure to accept reality Time confusion Impaired functioning Disbelief Short attention span Lack of concentration Difficulty with decisions Shock and Numbness—The beginning Source: Health Care Professionals’ Guide to Bereavement Support; NSIDSPSC

11. Restlessness Impatience and irritability Resentment and bitterness Anger and guilt Sleep difficulties/nightmares Preoccupation with deceased Lack of energy/fatigue Searching and Yearning Source: Health Care Professionals’ Guide to Bereavement Support; NSIDSPSC

12. Disorganized and forgetful Sadness and depression Social withdrawal Fatigue and exhaustion Poor concentration Insomnia Feelings of failure Fears of shaky grasp on reality Disorientation Source: Health Care Professionals’ Guide to Bereavement Support; NSIDSPSC

13. Normalized eating/sleeping habits Fuller spectrum of emotions Increased self-esteem Sparks of energy Able to make decisions Interest in future Reorganization Source: Health Care Professionals’ Guide to Bereavement Support; NSIDSPSC

14. Model: Phases Of Grief Shock / Numbness Searching/ yearning Disorientation Acceptance

15. Death causation Role guilt “If Only” Guilt Moral Guilt Survival Guilt Recovery Guilt Types of Guilt Source: Health Care Professionals’ Guide to Bereavement Support; NSIDSPSC

16. Anxiety/fear, who will be next? Anger at parents, god, baby and in general Death causation/survival guilt Regression Children’s Grief Source: Health Care Professionals’ Guide to Bereavement Support; NSIDSPSC

17. Review of the “quiz” • Now let’s review the questions about grief that you answered at the beginning of this module and review the answers.