The TOEFL Independent Essay: Steps to Writing Developmental Paragraphs

1. The TOEFL Independent Essay: Steps to Writing Developmental Paragraphs Wendy M. Gough St. Mary College/Nunoike Gaigo Senmon Gakko

2. What are Developmental Paragraphs? Developmental paragraphs form the body of your essay and give support to your controlling idea or thesis statement by presenting ideas, details, and examples to develop the controlling idea.

3. Writing Strong Developmental Paragraphs Follow these steps for writing good developmental paragraphs • Use your notes and outline to help • focus your ideas • Write a topic sentence for each paragraph that • relates to your controlling idea and tells the • reader what the paragraph will be about • Write sentences that support and add • details or examples to explain your topic • sentences.

4. Example Developmental paragraphs Read the following sample developmental paragraphs from Cambridge Preparation for the TOEFL Test (4th ed)

5. Hobbies are important for many reasons. First, a hobby can be educational. For example, if the hobby is stamp collecting, the person can learn about the countries of the world and even some of their history. Second, engaging in a hobby can lead to meeting other people with the same interests. A person can also meet other people by going to parties. Third, a person’s free time is being used in a positive way. The person has no time to be bored or get into mischief while engaged in the hobby. Finally, some hobbies can lead to a future job. A person who enjoys a hobby-related job is more satisfied with life (397).

6. Let’s look at this paragraph Topic sentence Hobbiesare importantfor many reasons. Topic Controlling idea The topic tells us the paragraph is about hobbies. The controlling idea tells us that the writer thinks hobbies are good or important. This is a pretty good topic sentence.

7. The following sentences should be about reasons for the importance of hobbies but this sentence A person can also meet other people by going to parties. Is not related to the importance of hobbies. This sentence weakens the paragraph because it is off the topic and should not be included in the paragraph.

8. Let’s look at another example The Smithsonian Institution is worth visiting for a number of reasons. The Smithsonian Institution comprises various museums that offer something to everyone. These museums include the National Museum of History and Technology, the National Aeronautics and Space Museum, The National Collection of Fine Arts, the National Museum of Natural History, and several others. A person can do more than just look at the exhibits. For example, in the insect zoo at the National Museum of Natural History, anyone who so desires can handle some of the exhibits. The museums provide unforgettable experiences. In climbing through the Skylab exhibit at the National Aeronautics and Space Museum, I was able to imagine what it would be like to be an astronaut in space. Movies shown at regular intervals aid in building an appreciation of our world. In the National Aeronautics and Space Museum, there is a theater that has a large screen. When the movie is shown, it gives the viewer the feeling that he or she is in the movie itself, either floating above the Earth in a hot air balloon or hang gliding over cliffs (398).

9. Topic sentence: Topic Controlling idea The Smithsonian Institutionis worth visitingfor a number of reasons. The topic tells us the paragraph is about The Smithsonian Institution. The controlling idea tells us that the writer thinks is a good place to visit. The writer only gives us a general statement. There are no details about the Smithsonian Institution.

10. Supporting idea 1 The Smithsonian Institution comprises various museumsthat offer something for everyone. This sentence tells us the writer will focus the paragraph on details related to the museums that make up the Smithsonian Institution. We still only have a only a general idea about the topic.

11. Details These museums include the National Museum of History and Technology, the National Aeronautics and Space Museum, the National Collection of Fine Arts, the National Museum of Natural History, and several others. The first detail sentence tells us the writer will give examples or other information only about these museums. The writer doesn’t give us details but we can expect the rest of the paragraph to focus on these museums.

12. Supporting idea 2 A person can do more than just look at the exhibits. The second supporting idea sentence tells us the writer will give examples about what we can do at the exhibits. This sentence introduces the details that will be given in the rest of the paragraph but we still don’t see examples.

13. Details - Examples For example, in the insect zoo at the National Museum of Natural History, anyone who so desires can handle some of the exhibits. This is a specific example of something we can do besides just look at the exhibits.

14. Supporting idea 3 The museums provide unforgettable experiences. This sentence introduces another example but gives no details about the example.

15. Details- Personal Experience In climbing through the Skylab exhibit at the National Aeronautics and Space Museum, I was able to imagine what it would be like to be an astronaut in space. This detail sentence uses a personal experience as an example to explain an unforgettable experience at the museum.

16. Supporting idea 4 Movies shown at regular intervals aid in building an appreciation of our world. This sentences introduces the next detail-building an appreciation of our world- but gives no specific information about the example.

17. Details- Description In the National Aeronautics and Space Museum, there is a theater that has a large screen. The first sentence gives us a detail about the museum. When a movie is shown, it gives the viewer the feeling that he or she is in the movie itself, either floating above the Earth in a hot-air balloon or hang gliding over cliffs. The second sentence gives an example to explain the detail in the first sentence.

18. References Gear, Jolene, & Gear, Robert. Cambridge Preparation for the TOEFL Test. 4th ed. New York, USA: Cambridge University Press, 2006.