“Defeminizing the Church; Will this Encourage more Men to Attend?”

1. “Defeminizing the Church; Will this Encourage more Men to Attend?” By: Mr. Reginald Williamson

2. How and why is the church considered feminine? • Consider the demographics of church during slavery and later during segregation • The black community struggle together (men and women) for freedom and equality. This bought the sexes together to celebrate and worship our God. The commitment of family and God was much stronger because of the Universal Treatment of all blacks. • After segregation, the world chose a sex to accept, the woman. The black woman made it possible to kill two birds with one stone: She is a female (minority) and she is black (minority). The black woman became more acceptable to society than the black man. This advantage took its toll in the black family driving many men away from the challenge of an employed working woman, where in most cases he was unemployed. The 1980’s ushered in an era of increased single family homes ran by women who needed strength. What better source of strength than church. The church is a source of community and strength and spiritual growth all in one. • Consider the ethics of the church and Church leaders: Men seem to recognize “the game”. • Purse and pastors chasing the wrong thing are a reason for men shying away from the church. • Submission to another man… Pride is another.

3. These are two reasons church femininity began to spread among the African American Churches. There is no balance of power or representation in the church. Most decisions are made by a board largely made up of women. Because women are the major benefactors of ministry, there is often a sense of entitlement by women to make certain decisions or to set the tone and atmosphere for worship and service. Clearly, men and women are different in expression of emotions and communication. But, when most of the churches are led by one man and hundreds of women, the overall tone of the church is going to reflect a feminine nature. Spread of femininity in the church

4. Men Absent in Church • Once upon a time, when a woman decided that she was ready to settle down and get married, she could begin her quest for a husband in the church. But if she tried today she would confront limitation.

5. Reasons for the absence of men in church • While the number of Black men incarcerated and killed in Black-on-black crime incidents continues to top the Bureau of Justice charts each year, the number of Black men in African-American churches has dropped to approximately 25 percent • According to studies African-American males who attend church regularly are either younger than 14 years old or over 60. • “Boys come because their mothers make them attend and older men often establish church membership when their health begins to fail,” according to studies. Consequently, the main group of men represented in the church are ages 20 to 40. • Some people believe there is a domino effect at hand: the black church is failing black men, black men are failing the black community, and the black community is failing the black family. • The church let’s everybody run free, it no longer holds people to any level of accountability. That’s why people think that the church is hypocritical. It’s become okay to go to the club on Saturday night and to church on Sunday morning. Children do as the please. • Some feel that the problem with the church is that it has become too accustomed to the world. They feel that the church could be more effective if more males not only attended services, but also became active in ministries in the church that seek to positively impact the community. • While many African-American churches salute the immeasurable influence that black women have had on the church throughout countless generations, more and more black churches are also seeking ways to bring more black men into their congregations, and several have already found success.

6. The next time you go to church… • Ask yourself, why do churches today look more like the women’s department of a store than a battalion of men poised to kick demons away? • Count the members of ladies to men in the pews, the result probably won’t shock you. • Churches today have become very dainty. Hanging out in church for most men seems immasculine. • The lack of strong men within the church, both in numeric and leadership sense, has crippled our churches.

7. How do we regain the masculine spirit in our houses of worship? • Men in the pulpit draws men. • Have the worship and the music leader use weighty worship music. • Address your décor, artwork, etc. • Address men leaving “mommy’s safe haven” and beware of parents and pastors who want to “mother” you. • Let the young men accept the masculine task of the patriarch. “go burn for your dream.”