The Top 10 Things to Know About Your Self-Talk

1. The Top 10 Things to Know About Your Self-Talk How to get started exploring the art of effective self-talk

2. We spend more time with our “selves” than any other person • We are listening to our internal dialogue

3. 1. Our Self Talk is Constant • What you say in your head goes on 24/7 • You have infinitely more input into your life than any other person

4. 2. Our Self-Talk Takes Place in Real Time • There is a running commentary in your head • If it’s good—you have a great friend • If it’s negative you are stuck with: • Crazy, negative, self-defeating statements that go on all day • Such statements tend to be self fulfilling

5. 3. Our Bodies Treat our Self-Talk as Real • What we say to ourselves in our head has physiological outcomes • Sweaty palms • Cloudy thinking • Physiological • STRESS

6. 4. Our Self-Talk is Influenced by Our Locus-of-Control • This is how we rationalize the cause of what happens • Everything is my fault • Everything is someone else’s fault • It happened because of chance or luck

7. 5. It Is Fascist • It is so powerful that it overwhelms other input—including reality • Your self talk may tell you that no member of the opposite sex wants to date you • You then fail to notice the opportunities that are present

8. 6. Negative Self-Talk Gets Loudest When You Need it Least • When the pressure is on—revert to default mode • Feeling stressed we often hype up the negative self talk—self defeating • Doing something new, risking self, etc.

9. 7. Self-talk Can Be A Major Life Force • Self-talk is relentless and ever-present • Tapes of negative self talk are most common • Negative is most easily acquired. Positive takes some work • Most of us do not reach adulthood with lots of positive self talk tapes

10. 8. You Talk to Yourself Like You Would Never Talk to Others • If you called others what you call yourself sometimes, they would be horrified and offended • This type of degrading self talk will not solve anything • It is terribly unkind and possibly untrue

11. 9. Ultimately, Negative self-talk creates a very toxic internal environment • You create a closed-loop toxic waste dump in your head • Every time you dip in you pull up something negative or self-defeating • You defeat yourself once again and throw that into the pile • It is very, very self defeating

12. 10. Listen to Your Body—It Really Listens to You! • The toxic environment creates: • Physical problems • Mental problems • Self defeating behavior • Any degree of negativity from yourself to yourself is not what you need • Tension is created between your “real” self and the negative self talk