Tuttleman Counseling Services 1810 Liacouras Walk (Main Campus ) Office Hours Monday – Friday 8:30 a.m. – 5:00 p.m.

1. Tuttleman Counseling Services 1810 Liacouras Walk (Main Campus) Office Hours Monday – Friday 8:30 a.m. – 5:00 p.m. Walk-In Clinic Mon., Tues, Thurs. & Fri. 10 a.m. to 1:30 p.m. Wednesday – 9 a.m. to 12 noon 215 204-7276 www.temple.edu/counseling Free and Confidential

2. Congratulations!

3. Student Transitions • Making new friends • Moving away from home • Making their own schedule • Making their own decisions • Starting new romantic relationships • Academic decisions • Managing money • Coping with STRESS

4. Homesickness • Common during their initial adjustment period. • Phone calls home usually help students adjust. • Encourage students to get involved! • Usually passes in three or four weeks. • The “cold turkey” approach is not usually helpful.

5. Parent Transitions • Should we rent their room out? • Can we really vacation alone? • What were those things we wanted to do? • Less laundry & less cleaning up. • More time for socializing. • Getting your car back.

6. Challenges and Expectations • Expectations about… • Communication • Academic performance • Vacations and visits home • Finances • Concerns about … • Drugs and alcohol • Sex & STIs • Adjustment issues • Academic failure

7. Communication • Talk to your student in advance about what your expectations are about when and how often they should call or e-mail. • Ask your son or daughter to give you the cell phone number of a college friend and/or roommate in case of emergency. • Try to be open and empathetic about their challenges and encourage them to find solutions on their own. • Talk to your students about expectations when school is not in session.

8. Listen for the underlying message… • If they are calling to discuss a problem, they want your help. • Convey caring and confidence in their ability to manage the situation. • If you are able to help them see the potential consequences of their actions, they may decide to change their behavior. • Asking about what your student thinks might help solve their problem and often can be productive.

9. Mistakes Happen! • Some students will experiment with drugs and/or alcohol, though less than half will. (not mine!) • Some students will begin or continue to be sexually active. (not mine!) • Some students will fail a class. (not mine!) • Some students will decide to change their major from pre-med to art history. (I can deal with that…)

10. Encourage your student to seek counseling services if …. • You notice a change in mood. • Their academic performance is poor. • They are not adjusting well. • You suspect drug or alcohol problems. • They are not solving problems. • You have any other concerns or suspicions that something is wrong.

11. Counseling…. • Involves helping students to learn to make healthy decisions, explore options, look at themselves and an honest and open way and make positive changes in their behavior. • Does not involve the counselor telling students what to do.

12. Common Problems • Relationship conflict • Anxiety • Depression • Loss issues • Adjustment issues • Sexuality related concerns • Drug and alcohol problems • Eating disorders • Self-esteem issues • Gambling and other financial concerns • Suicidal thoughts • Self injury • Marijuana abuse • Concern about someone else • Stress

13. Who usesTuttleman Counseling Services? • Last year approximately 2500 students came in for counseling services last year. • Students also attended a variety of workshops and other events throughout the year. • 350 students used psychiatric services. (If you live nearby, please continue to have your student’s physician manage their psychiatric medications and reserve TCS for emergencies.)

14. Some things to consider….. • Flexibility is good. • Listening does not mean agreeing. • Guide rather than pressure. • Physical distance is not the same as healthy separation. • Don’t over burden your student with your emotional issues. • Stay connected; be interested but not intrusive.

15. A Few More…….. • Explore and clarify boundaries. • Give advice, but only when requested. • Encourage greater independence. • Encourage use of campus resources. • Don’t be surprised if you don’t see much of them the first time they come home.

16. A Few More…….. • When your son or daughter calls home with a problem, they are not asking you to solve it; practice being a good listener. • Growth requires making mistakes. • Limit changes that make it seem as if you are continuing your family life without them. • Be a consistent, non-intrusive presence during the freshman year with letters, goodies, little gifts, money, and a few phone calls.

17. Final thoughts…… • Be willing to listen, slow to react. • Be supportive, listening, non-judgmental. • Be a consistent, non-intrusive presence during the freshman year with letters, goodies, little gifts, money, and a few phone calls. • Trust that your son or daughter is well prepared and that you did a good job.

18. Questions?

19. Tuttleman Counseling and Prevention Services 1810 Liacouras Walk (Main Campus) Monday – Friday Office Hours 8:30 a.m. – 5:00 p.m. Walk-In Clinic 10 a.m. to 2 p.m.215 204-7276 www.temple.edu/counseling Free and Confidential