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Writing concisely:

Writing concisely:. Trim the fat!. In this workshop, we’ll look at ways to get to the point and cut the clutter. Benefits of concise writing:. It’s clearer; It gets straight to the point; It’s easier to read; and It’s less pompous. Drawbacks of wordy writing. Slows down the pace;

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Writing concisely:

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  1. Writing concisely: Trim the fat!

  2. In this workshop, we’ll look at ways to get to the point and cut the clutter.

  3. Benefits of concise writing: • It’s clearer; • It gets straight to the point; • It’s easier to read; and • It’s less pompous.

  4. Drawbacks of wordy writing • Slows down the pace; • Wastes readers’ time; • Clouds your message with verbal clutter, and • Subtly erodes credibility.

  5. Why do we get so wordy? • We have to meet a certain length requirement; • We believe wordy writing sounds more academic; or • We may be trying to evade the truth.

  6. For example:“An inoperative statement was made” replaces “I lied.”

  7. A few categories of wordy writing:* Empty phrases* Redundancies* Passive construction* Using nouns and adjectives instead of verbs* “There is” or “there are” constructions

  8. Empty phrases: “At this point in time”“Due to the fact that”“In the event that”

  9. More examples: “An increasing proportion of” “The vast majority of” “The question as to whether”

  10. One simple word may be enough.

  11. For example: “At this point in time” = “now” “Due to the fact that” = “because” “In the event that” = “if”

  12. More examples: “An increasing proportion of” = “more” “A vast majority of” = “most” “The question as to whether” – “whether”

  13. Redundancies “In actual fact” “Each and every” “Modern world of today” “Completely finished”

  14. More redundancies“Over exaggerate”“Personal friend”“Uniquely original”

  15. And more… “Visible to the eye” “Fatally slain” “Free gift”

  16. Isn’t every gift free? “Happy Mother’s Day, Mom. That’ll be $50.00.”

  17. Passive voice Although passive construction is sometimes okay, you can really slow down your writing if you use it too often.

  18. Examples: Passive: “Class was attended by Mary.” Active: “Mary attended class.”

  19. More examples: Passive: “Sam was hired by the CEO.” Active: “The CEO hired Sam.”

  20. Using more action words Sometimes you can tighten up your writing by changing a noun or an adjective into a verb. Example: “Rosa Parks was resistant to giving up her seat on the bus” vs. “Rosa Parks resisted giving up her seat on the bus.

  21. Action words, contd. “We were responsible for the funding of the new school.” vs. “We funded the new school.”

  22. “There is” and “there are” How often do you really need to use “there is” or “there are” constructions?

  23. Less than you may think… “There are 20 students who signed up for this class” vs. “Twenty students signed up for this class.”

  24. “There are several reasons you need to revise your essay”vs.“You need to revise your essay for several reasons.” More examples:

  25. Other wordy sentences “In this book, it says that pigs can fly.” vs. “This book says that pigs can fly.”

  26. Another example: “It is the president who has veto power.” vs. “The president has veto power.”

  27. And another: “It is possible that nothing will come of all your effort” vs. “Nothing may come of all your efforts.”

  28. One more: “She has the ability to influence the outcome” vs. “She can influence the outcome.”

  29. Axe filler words and phrases • Kind of • Sort of • Type of • Really • Basically • For all intents and purposes • Definitely

  30. More filler words and phrases: • Actually • Generally

  31. Good writing is… …clear and to the point. That’s why direct phrases are better than wordy and confusing phrases.

  32. Rewrite the following: “During that time period, many car buyers preferred cars that were pink in color and shiny in appearance.”

  33. The S&S (short and sweet) version:“During that period, many car buyers preferred pink, shiny cars.”

  34. Shorten this: “Baseball, one of our oldest and most popular outdoor summer sports in terms of total attendance at ball parks and viewing on television, has the kind of rhythm of play on the field that alternates between times when players passively wait with no action taking place between the pitches to the batter and then times when they explode into action as the batter hits a pitched ball to one of the players and the player fields it.”

  35. S&S version: “Baseball has a rhythm that alternates between waiting and explosive action.”

  36. Consider your readers • They want to get your message, and • They don’t want to waste their time.

  37. SO GET TO THE POINT! And get rid of the clutter.

  38. Remember: Come to the Writing Center at ANY stage of the writing process: ● brain-storming, ● planning, ● developing, or ● finishing. Our professionally trained tutors will be happy to help!

  39. WorkshopsMadonna’s Writing Center offers the following workshops:● APA● MLA● CMS● Using Sources Correctly● Introductions and Conclusions● Getting Started● Developing Ideas● Revision● Writing Concisely● Evaluation ● Test-taking

  40. Work Cited • owl.english.purdue.edu

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