The SysOp's guide to running a really cool BBS.

The SysOp's guide to running a really cool BBS.

Electrik Kool Aid

SysOps are a slightly eccentric breed. Often they provide an outlet for

countless computer hobbyists that is free to everyone but the SysOp. In

return they tolerate abuse of their system, receive 3:00am phone calls

from users who have forgotten their password, incur substantial expenses,

and get very little, if any, acknowledgment that they exist as anything

more than the person who writes the logon announcements.

The low cost of the required hardware, the plethora of BBS software and

the relative ease with which a BBS can be run allows many people to enter

this somewhat bizarre profession in increasingly larger numbers. Though

often SysOps come and go as the passing fancy is crushed by the first

month's phone bill, there are those who enter and stay for the long-haul.

Telecommunications activity tends to snowball. Once a critical mass is

reached, more people are using BBSes and hence more want to run one. In

any area of notable size there may be several or several hundred systems

all competing for the finite pool of users and their limited spare time.

For a humble novice-SysOp to enter the ranks of the truly-exalted old

timers of the realm, s/he must make efforts and choose options that will

make his/her BBS "really cool" and hence a place everyone wants to call.

* DESIGNING A REALLY COOL BBS

Naming your BBS is very important. Select a name that simply drips with

the uniqueness of your board. Preferred examples include Pirate's Cove,

[YOUR NAME HERE]'s Corner, Electronic Connection, The Dungeon, Satan's

Lair, The Asylum, USS Enterprise, or anything dealing with "The Hitchhiker's

Guide to the Universe" books.

The first impression a user has of your system is the intro screen. While

geeks may choose something modest that gives the BBS name and baud rates

in one or two colors, it is essential to spend 40-50 hours using THE DRAW

to make an awesome screen that contains all the ANSI colors and several

references to all the k00l people who are your co-sysops. Long-distance

callers especially appreciate screens that take 45 to 120 seconds to draw,

and no system is complete without a crude drawing of a PC with flashing

disk-access and modem lights.

Adepts of the art will also make every effort to ignore computers that do

not handle ANSI commands properly. Certain programs for the Amiga and the

Mac will lock-up tight when subjected to obscure ANSI commands - especially

those that remap the keyboard. If you, by chance, happen to have a 1200 baud

modem it is critical that you animate your intro screen showing daggers

flying through the air, and people vomiting, urinating or ejaculating.

More action is better and will demonstrate to everyone that you have no life.

Some anal-compulsives tend to feel spelling is important. It is in your

best interest to ignore these idiots and use phonetics rather than the

dictionary for your opening screen.

* LOGON

Truly great BBSes need to have SysOp announcements. These should be long-

winded, obscure, and non-abortable. Special consideration should be made

towards keeping the same one for 9 or 10 months. Requesting money in

exchange for special access is also highly recommended - really absurd

figures (E.G. $200) can be justified by phrases that promise to spend the

The SysOp's guide to running a really cool BBS.