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Explore the definition and types of bullying, recognize bullying behaviors, and learn how to differentiate between conflict and bullying situations. Discover the impact of bullying on individuals and how to cope with and prevent bullying effectively.
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The Golden Rule In Matthew 7:12, it states: “So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you…” In other words: “Treat others the way you want to be treated”
Bullying Definition Behavior that is intentional (on purpose), hurtful and repeated by one or more persons. Bullied students are teased, harassed, and assaulted verbally or physically.
Did you know? The word “Bully” used to mean the total opposite of what it means now. Five hundred years ago, it meant friend, family member or sweetheart.
Two Types of Bullying Direct Indirect
Direct Physical – hitting, kicking, pushing, stealing, physically holding someone, hiding or ruining someone’s things. Making someone do something they don’t want to do. Verbal– name calling, teasing, insulting, threats.
Indirect Relationship Bullying– gossiping, spreading rumors and lies about someone. Making someone look foolish or unintelligent. Making someone feel left out or rejected.
Bullying can be... One person making fun of another. One person trying to beat up another. A group of people ganging up against others.
Bullying – You Decide? Tom asked Jim not to touch the blocks today because he wants to build a huge castle all by himself. Is this bullying? Tom told Jim that he would beat him up if he touched the blocks and then pushed Jim away. During story time Tom gave Jim a really mean look and sat on Jim’s hand. Is this bullying? Susan is calling mean names again, just like she did yesterday and the day before that. Is this bullying?
Bullying – You Decide? Susan and Sally are friends. Today they are having an argument. Susan called Sally a mean name and Sally called Susan a mean name. Is this bullying? Jonathan, Prita and Levi are arguing about who gets to play at the science centre. Is this bullying? One person keeps knocking over the towers that Sally and Sue have built at the construction centre. Last week she was wrecking their art projects. Is this bullying?
Bullying – You Decide When John walks in the hallway to his class, Chris repeatedly knocks his books out of his hand everyday. Is this bullying? Molly, Kim and Ann have formed a club and each day at lunch they play different games and won’t let anyone else in their group. Cindy asks quite often to join them and Molly says “NO” every time. The girls make up excuses, like it’s a secret, no one wants you here. Kim feels bad and doesn’t say anything. The girls laugh and whisper to each other and Cindy is always upset.
Bullying – You Decide Clothes are really important to Stacie and Marissa. They love to go shopping. Their parents are okay with them spending a great deal of money and time on clothing. Laurie doesn’t really care about clothing or shopping- she would rather play soccer or read. She wears whatever is easiest for her to grab in the morning. All three girls are in Girl Scouts together and often play together. Their parents are friends. Stacie and Marissa make fun of Laurie behind her back about her clothes and gossip about her. They have started teasing her about the way she dresses at school and when Laurie gets upset they tell her they are just kidding and to , “Lighten Up”. Laurie is starting to get stomach aches at school.
Bullying – You Decide Maria is having a birthday party and has invited a couple of girls from her class. Sarah is not invited and asks Maria if she can come. Maria says she was only allowed to invite a couple of friends and can’t ask anyone else. Ron and Dan are best friends. One day they have an argument about the rules of the tag game. They yell at each other. Is it bullying?
Some key differences between bullying and conflict: Normal Conflict • Occasional • Not pre-planned, in the heat of the moment • Genuine upset to both parties • Trying to work things out • Both parties admit some responsibility • Effort to solve the problem by both parties Bullying Behaviour • Is a repeated happening • Premeditated, on purpose, intentional and planned • Try to be the one in control • Want to take power or possessions from someone • Blame is laid on the person who is bullied • No effort to solve the problem by the person bullying
How does it make you feel? Hurt Sad Alone Low Self-Esteem (feel bad about himself) Anxious Scared
Characteristics of a Bully Excited by his/her bullying behavior Enjoys the feeling of power and control Enjoys causing pain Can be a below average, average or above average student. Can be anyone. Lacks compassion and empathy for his/her targets Can be all shapes and sizes
Reasons Doesn’t fit in Physically weak Minority Facial appearance Clothing Emotional Overweight Underweight Good grades
Ways to avoid future bullying Tell an adult, be confident and strong, stay calm, walk a way, say ‘stop it!’ ‘leave me alone!’ use ‘I messages’.
Ways to avoid future bullying Avoid bullies, act confident, look confident, be observant, tell a friend, tell an adult, be assertive, stay calm, keep a safe distance, walk a way, say ‘stop it!’ say ‘leave me alone!’ say ‘whatever!’ use humour, use ‘I messages’, travel in a group, join a group, if you are in danger, run away. “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent”. – Eleanor Roosevelt
Report, Report, Report Report it to a trusted adult immediately BE A HERO
Bystanders Part of the problem not the solution
Be a Hero Encourage other bystanders to help stop the bullying incident by being assertive. Make friends with someone who continually gets picked on. Report it or send someone to a trusted adult. You are a key player in stopping bullying.
Reporting vs Tattling Tattling– Is trying to get someone in trouble. Reporting – When you report bullying you are helping someone else.
Reasons The bully is someone others look up to and want to hang out with. They want to “side” with the bully because it makes them feel strong. They’re entertained by the bullying.
Reasons They don’t think speaking up will help. They’re afraid that if they say something, the bully will turn on them.
Some things you can say if someone is getting bullied. "That's Not Funny" "How would you like it if someone did that to you?" "Cut it out"
Ask Yourself These Questions Does it make you feel better to hurt other people or take their things? Do you sometimes use your size and strength to get your way?
Have you been bullied by someone in the past and feel like you have to make up for doing the same thing to others? Do you avoid thinking about how other people might feel if you say or do hurtful things to them? Ask Yourself These Questions
If you are a bully, here are some ways to stop Apologize to people that you have bullied, and follow it up by being friendly. They might not trust you right away, but eventually they will see that you have changed.
More ways to If you are having a hard time feeling good about yourself, explore ways to boost your self-esteem. Join a club or a team at school or outside of school. If you feel like you’re having trouble controlling your feelings, especially anger, talk to your teacher, your principal or your parents about it.
The Golden Rule In Matthew 7:12, it states: “So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you…” In other words: “Treat others the way you want to be treated.”
Credits PBSkids.org Youtube.com Stopbullyingnow.com Jaredstory.com
