Girl Space & Guy Space AASSA 2013 Emily Greenberg

1. Girl Space & Guy SpaceAASSA 2013 Emily Greenberg Creatinga safespace, mentorshipprogram in yourschool.

2. PresentationOverview • Introduction • Game of cards • Rationale • GroupGoals • SupportingResearch • Setting up yourownGirland/orGuySpace

3. King, Queenorlowly 3? • Youwill be given a cardtoholdoveryourforehead (don’t look at it) • Minglearoundtheroom and introduce yourself • Thisis a popularitygame… treatthosewhohavehigh status as youfeeltheymight be treated in yourschool and viceversa. • Try to determine where YOU fallonthescale.

4. How popular are you? Howdidyoufeelbeingtreatedthewayyouwere? Whatmadeyouknowwhereyoustoodon the social pyramid?

5. Why do we need girl’s and boy’sgroups in ourschools? • Isolation, bullying, puberty, relationships, identity, sexual orientation, self-esteem, body image, etc. Academic, social and emotional struggles • A safe space and a caring mentor = SUCCESS • The Kind Campaign • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-RooDSW5gfI&feature=relmfu

6. Purpose of Girl and Guy Space

7. Why are theseGroupsEssential? • According to statistics from Family First Aid, about 30 percent of teenagers in the U.S. have been involved in bullying, either as a bully or as a victim of teenage bullying. • 4% of women around the world consider themselves beautiful, and that anxiety about looks begins at an early age. In a study of over 1,200 10-to-17-year-olds, a majority of girls, 72%, said they felt tremendous pressure to be beautiful. The study also found that only 11% of girls around the world feel comfortable using the word beautiful to describe their looks. (Dove campaign)

8. South American Data • 8 out of 10 children in Bolivia may be affected by bullying • 20% of 1000 respondents to a survey of students in Bogota had been victims of daily bullying. • In another survey in El Salvador with apx 1000 participants, 20% said they felt the need to find a means to protect themselves from bullies http://plan-international.org/learnwithoutfear.org/files/bullying-position-paper

9. Acrosstheglobe… • Almost a quarter of seven million students questioned in Spain and a third of those surveyed in Australia reported being bullied by classmates. • A study of bullying in Korea found that 40% of respondents were involved in bullying either as a victim (14%), a bully (17%) or both (9%).

10. Cyberbullying • Adolescent girls are significantly more likely to have experienced cyberbullying in their lifetimes. • Cyberbullying Research Center Survey reported that 20.8% of the kids surveyed had been cyberbullied in their lifetime • One in ten parents online around the world say their child has experienced cyberbullying

11. BeyondBullying… • Students are tryingtofind a wayto be accepted in a peer group • Theymustexact a series of “strategicmanoeuvresdesignedtoachieve, manage and maintaincollective peer group status in theconflict-riddenenvironment of theco-educationalclassroom.” (Smith, J. 2007) • Our students are struggling to form their identities in a HOSTILE environment

12. Potential Results • Alienation • Social anxiety • Anguishing process of allying one’s self with a group • Negative construction of self image • Being labeled • Pressure to conform to gender stereotypes • Suicide • Depression • Mental illness • Failure and potential withdrawal from school

13. Where do thesestudentsgo? • We need to provide them with a safe space to be and explore who they are.

14. Safe Space Research tells us that when students • have a caring adult • have a place where they feel connected to school • have a “space” where they can talk about their world and personal lives • are engaged in relevant social action activities …They are more successful in school.

15. WhyGirlsGroups? • Girl Space Video Testimony • Mentorship of girls has shown a greatincrease in their socio-emotionalhealth and confidence • In a recent study, it was found that “these girls’ relationships with their mentors offered both emotional support and opportunities to develop skills and confidence through collaborations with their mentors in shared activities, such as doing homework together or learning to sing.” • Girlsneed positive female role modelsfromallwalks of life. • “For many of these girls, their mentors had the luxury of being able to spend lengthy amounts of time alone with them, something their stretched parents were often less able to offer. • Dove Video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IHqzlxGGJFo

16. WhyBoysGroups? • A largerpercentage of girlsexcel at standardizedtests and more girlsseekouthighereducation • Boys are generallylimitedtostrictdefinitions of masculinitywithintheir peer groups • Boysconstructtheirmasculinitiesbyimitating and evaluatingthemselvesagainstotherboys and men • Boysaccountfor a muchlargerproportion of behaviouralproblemsin schools • Boysaccountformost of thestudents in specialeducation • Schoolsoftenpaytoolittleattentiontoboys’issuesassumingthattheydon’tneedemotionalsupport. • BullyTrailer http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eUy2ZWoStr0

17. Establishing Girls’ and Boys’ Groups • Join the network of girls’ and boys’ groups across the globe • Step-by-step: how to create this king of group • Rationale • Vision • Structure • Possible activities and initiatives

18. Goals of Girl and Guy Space • Build self-esteem and self-efficacy • Discuss pertinent issues facing students • Provide a forum for students to discuss issues in a safe environment • Help build healthy and respectful bonds among students • Promote self-advocacy and advocating for others in the community • Provide students with the opportunities and support needed to achieve social/emotional well-being and academic success • Build caring and nurturing relationships with a caring adult

19. Goals continued • Build responsible and critical citizens who demonstrate courage in challenging inequities that exist in society • Where possible, provide long-term mentorship to support students from elementary schooling through to post-secondary educational options • Build succession and leadership opportunities for students to provide positive and critical mentorship for other students • Help students to challenge limiting notions of masculinity and femininity • Create opportunities for students that would not otherwise exist • Celebrate the successes of student, however small

20. Getting Started: Choosing a Mentor • Being a mentor means investing in and building a healthy relationship with your mentee. An atmosphere of trust and mutual respect must be the foundation. • Building relationships cannot be rushed and requires consistency. • Establish how often you will meet with your mentee and keep your word. Make the students believe they can count on YOU. • Find the RIGHT leader for your school population. (language, ethnicity, age, etc.)

21. A Critical Mass of Teachers • Mentorship is not an easy task. It requires time, effort, patience, and critical thought. • Consider having a few teachers, who have the ability to connect with children, to establish a meaningful mentorship program. • Inform your staff about your group and get them on board. A mentorship programs require "buy-in" from staff to be highly effective. • Share the structure of the program, the intention, and which students are involved. • By articulating the purpose of the program, stereotypes about what you are doing and why, can be reduced.

22. Involving Parents and Guardians • Mentorship is more likely to succeed when parents are well informed and involved (at appropriate times). • Parents should receive a letter, explaining the goals of the program, once your mentees have been selected. • Depending on your group and goals, you may want to give parents regular updates and include them as volunteers. However, always keep in mind that your number one priority is your relationship with the mentee and maintaining a level of trust and confidentiality.

23. Group Dynamics • Mentorship groups need a balance to be most effective. It is important to create heterogeneous groups with high achievers, low achievers, introverts, extroverts, various economic backgrounds etc. • Group numbers and dynamics  15 or less • Selection process: nomination by staff, counselors and admin, peers and self-nomination. • Stigma

24. Choosing and Gettingtoknowyourstudents • Meetwithcoaches, counselors, principals AHEAD of time toget a sense of whateachstudentsisbringingtothetable • Play gettoknowgamesthat are genuine and be onthe look outforyourstudents in the halls. • Check in withstudents • Box Tox • Firstdayquestionaire • Establish a confidential, consistentcomunicationsystem

25. Create a Presence in yourschool • Informteachersaboutgroup and membership • They can thenturntoyouifthey are havingdifficultywith a student • Create T-Shirts, buttons, scarves, etc, thatrepresentyourgroup. • Be thecaringadultforyourstudents. Check in onthemwhenpossible.

26. Structure and Unstructured Time • Mentorship groups need to provide an opportunity for multiple forms of interaction ie: sports, cooking, homework club, movie night, speakers, listening to music and critical discussions. • Balance between structured and unstructured time is important. Potential Activities: Yoga Paint-ball Healthy Cooking Class Guest speakers Homework help Thought-provoking films Identity Games Role-model visits Girls/Guys Without Walls

27. Social Service Component • Research suggests that school driven, socially conscious activities result in student success. • Mentorship programs CAN have a social action component where mentees can engage in personally meaningful and relevant social action projects. • Projects that are gender specific are ideal (ex. Juan Felipe Gomez Escobar Foundation health care to tens of thousands of children in Cartagena and provided more than 2,000 teenage mothers with counseling, education and job training.)

28. The Unlikely Leader • Aspire to position your mentor group as leaders within the school setting. • Opportunities for students to participate in fundraisers, assemblies are invaluable experiences • Have your older students mentor younger students

29. Questions about setting up a mentorship Group

30. Resources • Wiki • Will include all of the templates necessary to start a group • Possible activities to do with group for various issues • Useful links • Inspirational speaker ideas • Current research • Powerpoint from AASSA • My contact info

31. Conclusion: Creating a Balance Finding the balance between honoring our high achievers, extroverts and athletes AND Providing a fun and safe space for the students who haven’t found a place in our school communities Celebrate success, no matter how small!

32. Question Period

33. Thankyou • Thank you for your time and feedback