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Interface of relationships and personality. Relationships are one of most important aspects of our lives One of basic issues in psychology Cut across disciplines: clinical, social, developmental Will focus on interplay between personality and relationships How they form and dissolve
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Interface of relationships and personality • Relationships are one of most important aspects of our lives • One of basic issues in psychology • Cut across disciplines: clinical, social, developmental • Will focus on interplay between personality and relationships • How they form and dissolve • How they influence a person’s life • Interpersonal circumplex • Focus on personality characteristic: trust
Website of interest • http://www.yourpersonality.net • Has several “close relationships and personality” assessment measures; provides feedback
Overview of psychological literature on relationships Relationships are very relevant to personality Much of life and time is spent on/in relationships College students spend 75% of their waking time with other people Relationships relate to the same outcomes as personality Adjustment and mental health Marital status Relationships may be mediating variables
Definition of relationships Relationship refers to a state of mutual awareness and interdependence. Bond typically involves attraction, some degree of positive emotions, and commitment refers to intentions to be responsive and stay in the relationship. Many well-studied types of relationships Parent-child, peer, marriage, dating, teacher-student, and so on
Ways that personality and relationship interact Relationships and personality are deeply intertwined • Some theorists see early relationships as important contributors to later personality • Some see personality as relationship mechanisms • Some see relationships as manifestations of personality
Relationships Development and Processes Initiation phase Become aware of each other, meet, interact, become acquainted, and begin to affiliate Contributors to this phase include Characteristics of the person: shyness, sociability, trust Characteristics of the other: attractiveness, status Characteristics of the situation: proximity
Relationships Development and Processes Enhancement phase Get to know each other better through self-disclosure. Attraction and emotional bond develop Contributors to this phase include Many are same as for initiation Commonalities play role: mutual liking, shared interests, shared affiliations, and sexual intimacy Self-disclosure is important Self-disclosure varies according to type of relationship And to what is considered appropriate to situation
Relationships Development and Processes Maintenance phase How relationship develops after it is more or less established • Could be associated with greater closeness and interdependence • Could be marked by loss of interest or weakening of bond Contributors to this phase Are less well-studied Some are similar to previous phases Might be understood via exchange theory Ratio of what one gets to what one gives What this ratio would be in other possible relationships
Relationships Development and Processes Termination phase All relationships come to an end Interest has focused on two questions How and when relationships end How participants experience the ending Important contributors include Length and quality of relationship Circumstances of termination
Relationships Issues in studying relationships Multiple theories of stages Impact of factors may differ depending on stage Relationships do not develop in vacuums Relationships are highly subjective
Relationships and Personality Interpersonal circumplex Series of articles in 1950s (with Timothy Leary) Means of describing interpersonal behavior in a group therapy context Represents crossing of two dimensions Dominance--submission Affiliation--aggression More recently, personality psychologists have adapted it
Relationships and Personality Interpersonal behavior, can be organized graphically in a two-dimensional circumplex.
Relationships and Personality Interpersonal circumplex can be understood as rotation of the two interpersonal personality traits from the Big Five
Relationships and Personality- specific characteristic “trust” Interpersonal Trust: • Basic ingredient in development of relationships • Determines whether relationship will develop and how long it will last • May be the building block for society generally
Trust - Studied • General tendency (ie. Trait) vs. immediate experience (state) • People in general vs. specific person • Cause vs. consequence of relationship
Relationships and Personality Global trust – trait view Definition Generalized expectancy that an individual or group can be relied upon or belief that human beings are basically honest Suspicious, wary, and negative in their evaluations of others vs. accepting, inclined to take others at their word, and likely to make positive judgments of others Theories Erikson: basic trust vs. mistrust of specific others and world Bowlby: early attachment leads to working model of world Rotter: trust is expectancy that develops out of experience
Common view of trust from global trust perspective Common view trust is • a precursor to healthy adjustment • learned through experience with significant others • a developmental process • a general dimension of personality
Research on global trust • Those high in trust are perceived as attractive, trustworthy, having common sense, and are more liked than those low in global trust • High trust is related to high agreeableness • People higher in trust are happier and more well adjusted; low trust is related to emotional distress and anxiety • People high in trust are less likely to betray their own relationship • Also more likely to display love during times of threat to relationship
Relational Trust Relational trust Definition Sense of security in another person with whom one has an emotional bond Depends on experience within the relationship and is therefore dynamic Theories Component model: trust develops through phases—predictability, dependability, and faith Social exchange: trust builds gradually in response to increasing investments Appraisal model: relationships interpreted in line with trust level
Common view of trust from specific trust perspective trust develops • out of interpersonal exchanges • in a kind of positive feedback loop
Intimacy – a developmental viewpoint • Relationships NOT simply the sum of personal characteristics of each individual in the dyad • Relationships consist of unique dyadic interactions • Individuals and relationships are reciprocally related • Individuals are products of their relationships • Individuals are the architects of their relationships • Relationships are integral to achieving a positive outcome in life • Lead to healthy adaptations • Do not limit a person in future
Development of capacity for intimacy • Early relationships contribute to 3 components of interpersonal closeness and (eventually) intimacy: • Relationships with caregivers should lead to positive expectations about interactions with others • Learn reciprocity/empathic relating • Develop a sense of self-worth and efficacy
Attachment history and emerging closeness in peer relationships Minnesota Parent-Child Project 267 1st born children, low income • followed from 3rd trimester • Seen 7 times in first year • 2 times in years 2 – 5 • Once a year through 7th grade • Seen at ages 13, 16, and 19 • Neurological assessments, maternal personality, child temperament, personality development, intellectual capacity, stress points in life, observed at home, lab, and school
Development of capacity for intimacy continued • Intimacy: mutually perceived understanding, validation, and caring from each other • Primary measure of early relationship was Strange Situation • Secure attachment • Insecure – anxious attachment • Insecure – avoidant attachment • Links to peer relationships • Preschool: need to master challenges and problems using own resources. • Other people can be helpful. Effectiveness in relating to others, especially adults, is fundamental to competence. • Children with secure histories demonstrated greater competence by participating more actively with peer group, showing more positive affect and less negative affect than insecure children.
Links to peer relationships continued • Preschool children with secure attachment: • Displayed greater reciprocity • Dealt more effectively with conflict • Never involved as victim or victimizer in repetitive victimization dyads • Exploiter was a child with a avoidant attachment pattern in every case • Victim was either anxious or avoidant
Links to teacher relationships in preschool • Secure children: • Teachers were warm & straightforward • Had age-appropriate expectations • Expected compliance with rules • Insecure – avoidant • Teachers were controlling • Sometimes angry, had low expectations of compliance • Children were often hostile and defiant • Insecure – anxious • Teachers were unduly nurturant and caretaking • Had low expectations for compliance • Tolerant of minor infractions
Relationships in middle childhood • Increased capacity to form close, mutual friendships at this age helps with future intimacy • Friendships at this age: • Are more qualitatively unique than at earlier ages • Are strongly differentiated in terms of gender and in terms of depth of friendship • Often emotionally deep
Friendships in middle childhood continued • Children who had been securely attached at 12-18 months were more likely to have form a friendship than those were insecurely attached. • Securely attached children tended to form friendships with other securely attached children. • Secure-secure pairs were obvious in groups, but children were free to interact with others (no threat) • Avoidant-avoidant pairs exhibited exclusive relationships-not free to interact with others. Jealousy, often separate from others. Had difficulty interacting with others. • Resistant-resistant pairs showed little loyalty to each other; were unreliable.
Adolescent intimacy and romantic relationships Part of the development of romantic relationships includes: • Dating • Being involved in a romantic relationship that has some longer-term potential • Becoming sexually active
Dating • Stems from involvement with social crowds • By college, people emphasize intimacy, companionship, and socialization as reasons for dating. • Often related to social skills and acceptance by peers rather than capacity for intimacy • 16 year olds with secure histories more likely to have dated • 16 year olds with anxious histories less likely to have dated
Romantic relationships • Marked by a higher level of commitment • Early adolescent self-reports of love are similar to adults: satisfaction is positively correlated with passion, giving and getting communication, commitment, and emotional support. • Have more extreme positive emotions: exhilaration, feelings of specialness. • Satisfaction less related to negative affect, perceived trouble, or conflict (in contrast to adults). Consistent with “young love” stereotype.
Loss of intimacy • Good predictor of divorce • Review of literature suggested that best predictors of divorce were interactive problems (e.g. antagonism, lack of respect, conflict) • Thought that people generally started marriage in romantic bliss • Romance gradually faded, and couple had trouble negotiating differences and dealing appropriately with conflict • This research was done with already married couples, many of whom were already on way to divorce. Makes sense that hostility would then predict divorce. Wanted to look at couples in earlier stages to find early signs of distress
Study related to marriage/divorce • 168 couples followed from wedding day through next 13 years • Many newlyweds start out being unhappy (contrary to popular belief) • Marriages based on high romance and passion are particularly divorce-prone because this passion is so hard to maintain. • Spouses in lackluster marriages are not divorce prone—they seem to continue as is. • Loss of love, affection, and emotional intimacy (rather than increase in conflict) that leads to divorce.
Robins, Caspi, & Moffit (2002) JPSPpersonality traits • 30 year longitudinal study • repeatedly assessed a representative birth cohort since age 3 • A woman’s relationship happiness is predicated by her partner’s low Negative Emotionality, high Positive Emotionality, and high Constraint • Man’s relationship happiness is predicted only by his partner’s low Negative Emotionality
Link between personality and physical abuse in relationships • Perpetrator’s characteristics (specifically negative emotionality) predict their abusive behavior • Victim’s characteristics (specifically negative emotionality) predict their victimization • Most important ingredient of a happy and non-abusive relationship is that both partners are low in tendency to experience negative emotions. Tendency to experience positive emotions is also important but is less influential.