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Changing Negative Thoughts to Positive Ones. Working on changing negative thoughts to positive ones can help you to feel much better. You can do it along with any other treatment.
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Changing Negative Thoughts to Positive Ones Working on changing negative thoughts to positive ones can help you to feel much better. You can do it along with any other treatment. Developed by Mary Ellen Copeland PO Box 301, West Dummerston, VT 05357-0301 www.mentalhealthrecovery.com
Focus on this work may be more intense at some times and informal at other times, depending on your need and what feels right to you. You may need a break from this work from time to time. If you work too hard at it you may get “burned out” or lose interest. Developed by Mary Ellen Copeland PO Box 301, West Dummerston, VT 05357-0301 www.mentalhealthrecovery.com
While the direction and support of a counselor may help, you can do this work safely and effectively on your own, using books like: • The Depression Workbookby Mary Ellen Copeland • Thoughts and Feelingsby Matthew McKay, Ph.D., Martha Davis, Ph.D., and Patrick FanningThe Feeling Good Handbookby David Burns, M.D. • Feeling Goodby David Burns, M.D. • You can use a notebook or your journal for the exercises and to keep records of progress. You could also use a tape recorder to do this work. Developed by Mary Ellen Copeland PO Box 301, West Dummerston, VT 05357-0301 www.mentalhealthrecovery.com
What are Negative Thoughts? Negative thoughts are unkind things we tell ourselves about ourselves. They may be shortcuts for trying to say something else like saying “I am a jerk” instead of “I have trouble with math.” You tend to believe them even if they don’t make any sense. You may say them quickly to yourself without really thinking about what you are saying. They may include words like should, ought, or must. They tend to see the worst in everything. Negative thoughts differ from person to person. It takes effort to stop yourself from having these thoughts. Developed by Mary Ellen Copeland PO Box 301, West Dummerston, VT 05357-0301 www.mentalhealthrecovery.com
Examples of common negative thoughts include: • “I will never have a job” • “I could never further my education” • “No one would ever hire me” • “I will never feel well again” • “I will never meet my life goals” • “I am stupid” • “I can't do anything right” • “I am a complete failure” • “I mess up everything” • “No one would ever love (or like) me” • “I don't deserve to be alive” • “I will never accomplish anything worthwhile” • “I will never be good enough” • “I am a jerk” • “I am a loser” Developed by Mary Ellen Copeland PO Box 301, West Dummerston, VT 05357-0301 www.mentalhealthrecovery.com
Make a list of your negative thoughts. You can easily do this by yourself. Most people do. Keep a small notebook with you and whenever you notice you are having a negative thought, jot it down. Do this for several days. Especially try to notice your thoughts when you are in stressful situations, like when you are tired or in certain work situations. You could do this with your counselor or another supporter. Developed by Mary Ellen Copeland PO Box 301, West Dummerston, VT 05357-0301 www.mentalhealthrecovery.com
Often looking at the thought in a new way helps to get rid of it. • Asking yourself the following questions about each thought may help you to see things differently: • Is it really true? • Would a nice person say this to someone else? • Do the words really fit the situation? • What do you get out of saying this to yourself? • Ask someone who likes you if this thought is really true. • Are you really looking at the whole situation?Continued Developed by Mary Ellen Copeland PO Box 301, West Dummerston, VT 05357-0301 www.mentalhealthrecovery.com
Is there something else you could say to yourself that would help you feel better instead of worse? • Are you really seeing the whole picture or just the extremes? • Are you making assumptions about what others feel? • Do you really know enough about the situation to make this state- ment to yourself? • Are you expecting the worst to happen? • Do you always need to prove to others that you are right, even when you realize you are wrong? • Do you believe you have to be perfect and never make mistakes?Continued Developed by Mary Ellen Copeland PO Box 301, West Dummerston, VT 05357-0301 www.mentalhealthrecovery.com
Are you relating everything to yourself and always comparing yourself to others? • Do you feel that others are always in control and you don’t have any control? • Do you feel like you have to control everything? • Do you think that everything always has to be fair? • Do you believe that everything you feel is true? • Do you think that you would be really happy if only others would change? • Do you blame others for everything? • Do you have a lot of “shoulds” that you could let go of? Developed by Mary Ellen Copeland PO Box 301, West Dummerston, VT 05357-0301 www.mentalhealthrecovery.com
Develop positive things to say to yourself that refute your negative thoughts. When you are doing this: • Avoid negative words such asworried, frightened, upset, tired, bored, not, never, can't • Use only positive words likehappy, peaceful, loving, warm enthusiastic • Substitute “it would be nice if” for “should” • Always use the present tense, e.g., “I am healthy, I am well, I am happy, I have a good job,” as if the condition already exists • Use I, me or your own name Developed by Mary Ellen Copeland PO Box 301, West Dummerston, VT 05357-0301 www.mentalhealthrecovery.com
Examples of positive things you could say to yourself instead of the negative thought: • Negative Thought:I will never hold down a jobPositive Thought:I can hold down a job • Negative Thought:I will never be well Positive Thought: I am well • Negative Thought:I am not worth anything Positive Thought:I am a valuable person • Negative Thought:I have never accomplished anythingPositive Thought: I have accomplished many things • Negative Thought:It is not OK to make mistakesPositive Thought:It is OK to make mistakes • Negative Thought:I want to die Positive Thought:I choose life • Negative Thought: I will never be able to take care of myselfPositive Thought:I take care of myself ." Developed by Mary Ellen Copeland PO Box 301, West Dummerston, VT 05357-0301 www.mentalhealthrecovery.com
You can help change your negative thoughts to positive ones by: • Writing the positive rebuttals over and over • Repeatedly thinking them to yourself • Repeating them to yourself aloud • Repeating them: • When you are doing arelaxation exercise • Before you go to sleep • When doing the dishes and other chores, • When you are waiting in traffic, or for appointments Developed by Mary Ellen Copeland PO Box 301, West Dummerston, VT 05357-0301 www.mentalhealthrecovery.com
Use creative activities,like visualizations, lists, and signs hung around your home or in your workspace to remind yourself of positive thoughts. Negative thoughts have often become so familiar to us that change takes continuous work, and creativity. It often takes several weeks to several months to effectively change the negative thought to a positive one. Developed by Mary Ellen Copeland PO Box 301, West Dummerston, VT 05357-0301 www.mentalhealthrecovery.com